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Top Michael Jackson Jokes

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According to Web Usage Associates (and Public Notary), the following ten Michael Jackson Jokes are the most popular with Americans.

Q: What’s the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
A: One is white, made out of plastic, and dangerous for kids to play with and the other you carry your groceries in.

Q: How can you tell if Michael Jackson has a hot date?
A: There’s a big wheel parked outside his house.

Q: Why does Michael Jackson like twenty eight year olds?
A: Because there are twenty of them.

Q: Who does Michael Jackson consider a Perfect “10”?
A: Two 5 year olds.

Q: How does Michael Jackson pick his nose?
A: From a catalogue.

Q: Why did Michael Jackson place a phone call to Boyz-2-Men??
A: He thought it was a delivery service.

Q: What has 18 balls and 3 pubic hairs?
A: A Michael Jackson slumber party.

Q: Did you know they’re putting out a Michael Jackson stamp?
A: Fans get to vote for the white or black Michael Jackson.

Q: What’s brown and often found in a baby’s diaper?
A: Michael Jackson’s hand.

Prince Michael Jackson, Jr. – you know in a few years they’ll probably change his name to: The Child Formerly Known as Michael Jackson’s Baby.

UPDATE 7/1/2009 – Michael Jackson passed away last week and we’ve been getting alot of comments about his death. Please be sure to read this post prior to making any further comments. That’d be swell. ~F&J

UPDATE 8/25/2009 – We’ve gotten over 4,000 comments (hundreds have been rejected) on this post. I mean really, we’ve got to close it. That’s just crazy.

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Comments

  3. OMG wats wrong wit yuu all?? You are accusing someone of something he has been found not guilty of! You all need to get over yourselves

  4. calm down we all know he did it. besides there jokes nobody cares who u are in a joke its suposed to be mean.

  6. Hey them jokes are hilarious alright but guys, give Michael a break he’s human just like the rest of us and deserves to be treated with some respect. Bottom line, he’s awsome and his music rocks!!!!!!!!!!!!

  7. I wonder how many of you guys who are accusing Michael of molesting kids are parents or have any relation to any one of those kids!!!!!!!! My guess is there’s non!!!!! So maybe next time you might wanna create some joke, do it but about yourselves. Oh I know one, GO TO HELLLLLL!!!! Michael is one of the coolest guys alive, and are you guys blind? His charities are 2nd largest after Oprah’s. And I don’t think they’re charities for dogs or cats. They’re for children so pliz put a sock in it!!!!!!!!!

  12. YOU GUYS HAVE KNOW IDEA WHAT YOUR TALKING ABOUT, LITTLE KIDS DONT TURN ME ON, THEY JUST MAKE ME FEEL WORTH WHILE

  14. whats tha difference between Michael Jackson and an x-box? nothing! they are both made of plastic and it takes a 14 yr old to turn them on! (and M.J is NOT human hes made of plastic!)

  16. Hey, I’m so like against this but i gotta go with the flo!!! I got 1 joke hope you’ll find it hilariuous coz I did. Instead of getting a new nose, Michael would have gotten an Adams apple coz wssp with his voice? did he ever break it???????

  17. Just stop messing with my husband. He’s so pure and simple. He did nothing to hurt anyone (including children).Once he said,”Instead of
    hurting children,I’ll cut my wrist”. Why can’t people understand him? He’s so beautiful inside and out. Please have some empathy.
    “JUST STOP PRESSURING HIM!!”

  18. Q: What did the woman at the beach say to Michael Jackson?
    A: Get out of my son

    Q: When is it bedtime at the neverland ranch?
    A: When the big hand touches the little hand

    Q: Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a catholic priest?
    A: Nothing

  21. lol
    Q- whats the simularence beteween michael jackson and mc donalds.

    A- they both stick there meat between two 10 year old buns

  25. Did you hear McDonalds is releasing a new burger The Michael Jackson Burger Thats 45 year old meat between 8 year old buns

  26. wow melissa first its a joke and second him doing that and him singing good hav nothing to do with each other and the bigest donation everyh was bill gates he donated 6 billion one time

  27. Pplz
    If you come on here to diss people about looking at michael jackson jokes then why did u come on here?????
    o.O
    So b4 u critisize other people for thinking michael jackson is weird then dont search up ‘michael jackson jokes’ or watever u searched up.

  30. In all these jokes all you could talk about was michael and kids. And he was found to be not guilty and your still talking about him, ya’ll so damn dummmmmmmmmmm!!! But i wouldnt mind some sex right now WINK WINK.

  32. haha lol i tell you a michael jackson joke Q:why didn’t michael jackson know how to play chess? A:because he didn’t know if he was black or white lol jokes

  33. if u dont like us joking mj then stay off this site because u r a dumb a** pu**y that should die by being a** fu***d in the A** by mj and a gang of molesters

  34. hey i like that jokes and everything cause there really funny and my friends think so too and i’m not trying to defend him or anything but i think we should respect him more…….but i still think these jokes are awsom!!!!!!

  35. whats the diiference between michael jackson and pimples?

    Pimples wait till your at least 14 till they come all over your face.

  36. What do Micheal Jackson and a playstation 2 have in common? They’re both plastic and can be turned on by children ;-0

  37. Why is no one making any jokes about me. I’m funny to make fun of… and why do you have to be making fun of my bestest friend Mikey, he’s a good guy once you get to no him and most of the time he always gives me a “Pain in the Ass”.

  38. I don’t think he was necessarily guilty, but I can still laugh at those jokes because they are so immature

  39. what did micael jackson do in the toilet?
    he dropped his billy jeans, pulled out his thriller, and just beat it!

    😉

  41. if you listen to thriller backwards m.j admits the names of all the kids he molested, thats why it’s 14 minutes long

  42. what are they going to do to michael jackson when he dies? they are going to melt him and then turn him into little plastic doles so kids can play with him for a change

  43. im innocent i swear on your son’s life if you don’t believe me just ask your son

  44. what does michael jackson and a ps2 have in common ?

    both made of plastic and turned on by children

  45. Q: Whats the difference between micheal jackson and ACNE?
    A: Acne doesnt come on your face until your 13!

  46. Y da majority uv yal foolz tryna crakk on m.j & can’t spell his name correctly??? Go 2 skool… && luv sum uv those jokez … yal craziii!!!!

  47. i think all you lot are just sad people, if you think this is funny you really need to get a life……. you can only find this funny if your a peodophile that only thinks of little kids and grown men, you need to be ashamed of yourselvs. really have u ever seen MJ touch a little kid the wrong way its only the press that make u think like this…. and if you believe everything they say on the news then you are just a bunch of dumbasses.

    looooosssers

  50. this site is great. i love reading jokes about him, hes a nasty perve. who sure dont deserve to be wandering around the streets there are alot of little boyz that dont need an old douch like him touchin them. i mean seriously just because the newz people said he was inoccent dont mean he really is. he could have had paid people to stick up fo him. hes nasty and no one likes him. and if you just came on this site to tell people off then you really have problems cause these people dont like him either. GET IT THREW YOUR HEAD NO ONE LIKES MICHAEL JACKSON. his music i suppose is iight. but him no. never.

  51. yal retards if yall talkin bout the fine michael jackson none of the jokes is funny and i bet none of yall seen michael touch a little kid in a bad way thats why he made that song “leave me alone”if he touched a kid then why does he have kids and im his second biggest fan and my 18 year old cousin is his first biggest fan.so if he did touch kids why does macauly cunkins mom let him hang out with michael and janet but mostly michael oh and michael is black he just has a skin disease called ventiligo if he was white then why is his parents black and no they didn’t adopt him so shut up

  52. michaels a good man i have him all over my bebo site and who ever is trying to act as him they better stop i’m his bigest fan and im part of a fan club live the king of rock im RYAN LAVELLE and dont blame him if you blame anyone well dony blame just get over it he didnt do all the things people say he done ye are just stupid!!!

  53. I just had to add a few jokes about Whakko-Jakko. Hope you like them.

    Q: How do you know when it’s bedtime at Michael Jackson’s house?
    A: When the big hand touches the little hand.

    Q: What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?
    A: GET OUT OF MY SUN!!!

    Q: What is Michael Jackson’s favorite nursery rhyme?
    A: Little Boy Blew

    Q: What does Michael Jackson reminisce about when he gets nostalgic?
    A: Blowing his first nose.

    Q: He asked his wife’s doctor how soon after the birth could he have sex.
    A: The doctor told him he should wait until the kid is at least 12 or 13 years old.

    Q: What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?
    A: Got two fives for a ten?

    Q: What’s the difference between Mr. Potato Head and Michael Jackson?
    A: Michael Jackson has had more noses.

    Q: What’s the difference between Michael Jackson and a Plastic bag?
    A: One is made out of plastic and is dangerous for kids to play with and one is used to carry groceries.

    Q: Did you hear about Michael Jackson’s latest record?
    A: “Feel the World.”

    Q: Did you hear about Michael Jackson’s latest song?
    A: “Don’t let your son go down on me.”

    Q: What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?
    A: “The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!”

    Q: What did Michael Jackson say when a boy in a car mooned him going down the road?
    A: “I’ll be there!”

    If you play thriller backwards, you can hear Michael confessing all the names of the boys he touched. That’s why it is 14 minutes long.

    Q: What is Michael Jackson’s favorite gospel song?
    A: “And then he touched me”

    Q: Why does Michael Jackson want to move to Ohio?
    A: He heard there’s a Youngstown there.

    Q: What’s Micheal Jackson’s Chinese name?
    A: Melikeemyoung.

    Q: Did you hear that Michael Jackson was taken to the Emergency Room?
    A: He was choking on a small bone!

    I got tons more……but this should do for a while. Take care all, and enjoy the jokes!!

  55. Ok i have 1 joke it’s:

    Q. What Does Michael Jackson And Xbox 360s Have In Common?
    A. Little Boy Turn Them On, They’re Plastic and They’re Both White Now.

  56. Nice jokes boiz all of them are good some funnyer than others, but i have one more to add…

    Q.what dose michael jackson and santa claws got in commen?
    A.they both kreep into little kids rooms at night and empty there sacks.

  57. Ya’ll are just sad! Michael is totally innocent! Do you honestly think that he abused those kids? Hello, he’s Mr. World Peace and Heal The World! WHY would he abuse those kids? He LOVES kids! But the ‘How does MJ pick his nose’-‘from a catalogue’, was very funny! But not so nice to poor old Michael.

  59. this is really funny i can’t think in a million years that a big time pop star would be come a raper omg=0 and this crap is funny but i love michael jacskon i even scream his name i all of my classes i get in trouble a lot so:0

  60. how do u think that michael jackson would not touch kids umm plus just to trow in he LOVES KIDS now what big pop star really likes kids really come on think about this :0 oh yeah i no im smart i got ya’ll there .

  61. haha here’s a good one:

    Q: what do Wal-mart and Michael Jackson have in common?
    A: they both have little boys pants half off!!! lol

  62. Q: whats do michael jackson and santa clause have in common?
    A: they both leave childrens rooms with empty sacks!

    anyway i think MJ is awesome nobodys even got real proof of him raping kids hes just being acused!

  63. I don’t know what to beleive about Micheal Jackson,but just in case I’ll just stick to liking his music.

  65. Hahah, these fucking jokes are priceless.
    and Yeah, all of you people defending Michael Jackson, why would you be on a site reading Michael Jackson jokes? Makes no sense at all.
    Nobody knows if he’s innocent or guilty, so anyone can say what they want. It’s called freedom of speech. So If you all are so worried about it, make a site defending him. And we who enjoy these jokes will stay off of it.
    Oh, and you people saying he’s innocent, because he loves kids, yep that’s REAL convincing, clearly he LOVES kids. You might want to read what you write before posting it 🙂

    Here’s another joke for you 🙂
    —
    Q: Why did Michael Jackson place a call to Boyz-2-Men?
    A: He thought it was a delivery service.

  66. Michael Jackson has only been good and kind to kids and our world and this is how yee repay him.Michaels a nice person and so what if he likes little kids what is so bad about having sex with kids as long as they want it as well .So just leave him alone ok.Its just his way of showing geinuine love ok.Its hardly life threathing is it if he fancys kids.

  67. I dont care if his music is good or not i hate him if wants to be a women have surgery like dat 1 guy on tv…And defind him all u want childmelesters dont want peace(aparently)…I if ur a fan u r must be on roids or somtin…
    Suck on dat…U must b really sick if u like him…

  68. Yall are really immature they never proved anything and these are the lamest jokes ever .Yall must have no life to make fun of him i love this guy.He is my INSPERATION.
    ♥Gabbi

  69. Haha! Those are hilarious jokes.

    What does Michael Jackson and McDonald’s have in common?

    50 year old meat between 12 year old buns.

  71. Michael Jakson must have a twin because (Brooke leann torres) likes rapeing little boys too. (At brentwood middle school)

  73. Lets all hop aboard the bandwagon and rage against Michael Jackson!!!!!
    Don’t you love ignorance?!?!?!?!?!?!?

  75. JUST LEAVE HIM ALONE!!!! Who are we to judge him.. God knows the truth.. everybody makes mistakes, so, if he really did the mistakes please forgive him for God sake.. feel the humanity and what the use to hurt him uttering those stupid words..he did so many good things for us and why you guys dont want talk about his kindness..pitty him and he’s getting old too..please, please forgive him..i dont have any relationship with him but its really pain to see him as a victim of shame and hate..we know that he’s keep smillling at us eventhough his heart is aching..so please just give him a life…a new life..

  78. Sky news misunderstood, they said Jackson had woke up on a childrens ward and said he thought he’d died and gone to heaven..

  79. micheal jackson did manage to whisper something to the paramedics on the way to hospital, he said ” put me on the childrens ward ” then he sadly died

  80. All I can say is…

    Don’t blame it on sunshine
    Don’t blame it on moonlight
    Don’t blame it on good times
    Blame it on the dodgy ticker.

  81. michael jackson is to be cremeated and turned into lego so children can play with him for a change

  82. Micheal Jackson’s funeral may be delayed while his family decide how to dispose of the body – they cant decide weather to burn him bury him or recycle him

  83. what is the point of coming onto a JOKE website and not expecting to see jokes about michael jackson! a JOKE website is a website where people tell JOKES, so if you don’t want to hear any JOKES about the precious Michael Jackson then don’t come onto a JOKE website. Use the one brain cell you have and work it out!

  85. WHY DID MICHEAL JACKSON BUY A HOUSE IN JASPER INDIANA?

    BECAUSE THE COUNTY IS CALLED DUBOIS. ( DO BOYS)

  86. Hey Gaz, lets hope they don’t cremate him the ozone is screwed enough as it is…

  88. Mcdonalds is dedicating a burger to michael jackson called the mcjackson…….its a 50 year old piece of meat in a 8 year old bun. Its going to come as a happy meal.

  90. It wasnt a heart attack apparently he had an allergic reaction to eating 12 year old nuts

  91. McDonald’s has a special MJ Tribute Burger: 50 year old meat on 8 year old buns. Best song by MJ: 1.2.3. R.I.P. MJ go to heaven and was spotted by Elvis. Elvis whispered something in St. Peter’s ear. St. Pete went to the Pearly Gates and told MJ to “Beat it, just beat it.”

  92. I THINK ALLL YALL WHO MADE JOKES ABOUT MICHAEL JACKSON SHOULD SHUT THE H.E.L.L UP…. HE JUST DIED TODAY.. AND YEAH I BET YOU GUYS ARE WONDERING YEAH U MADE JOKES ABOUT HIMTHE OTHER DAY AND THEN THE NEXT HIS GONE LIKE THAT. WATCH WHO YOU TALK ABOUT CUSS THEY MAY GO… OR EVEN WORST YOU MAY GO

  94. Walmart has just announced the “Michael Jackson” sale this weekend: “Boys pants, 1/2 off”

  96. I hope you people are happy now i don’t think he was guilty of any of that he gave more money to charities then any other singer this world has ever known he had a good heart and if he didn’t and he was guilty of that why did he write heal the world and then he openned up his house for the children he was put under that much stress no wonder why he died of a cardiac arrest why couldn’t people have just left him alone he might have still been here today if people were not so jeolous of his success and why were parents letting there children go to never land ranch there was more then one occasion of molestation charges laid and if he was that bad why wasn’t his children removed from his care because he was found not guilty and rightly so more poeple should be morally outraged by people now thinking they can feel free to make fun of his death when he was some ones son, brother, nephew, friend and idol every one loved him except a handful of very jeolous of people who were just interested in making his life hell and not leaving him alone R.I.P. MICHAEL hopefully now people will leave you alone

  98. It was misreported that Micheal Jackson was admitted to hospital for a heart attack. He was actually in the children’s ward having a stroke.

  101. NO ITS NOT SAD. HE MOLESTED CHILDREN! IM GLAD TO SEE HIM DEAD. I WANNA BANG HIS SISTER(JANET). I HOPE HE BURNS IN HELL!!

    FREE T.I.!

  102. By Michael, You will be remembered. Also don’t forget back in the 80’s: Q Why does Brooke Shield prefer Lionel Richie over Mike Jackson? A: Because Mike beats it while Lionel does it all night ong! HAHAHAHAHA

  103. Why cant people let Michael rest in peace – no need for racist comments – he reached and touched the world

  105. did you hear michael jackson now likes girls more than boys?

    he’s pushing up daisys instead of pushing up david

  107. there’s been reports of Michael Jackson died of a heart attack this is untrue he was just found in the children’s wourd having a stroke .

  108. Funny jokes, This happens to every celebrity that dies unfortunatly. I believe Jacko was innocent and was a great man. RIP Jacko!

  109. i can’t believe it.
    you are all just low lifes who do nothing in life.
    this really justr sad.
    why would he be a melestura if he was famous.
    you all make me sick.
    he just died, i bet you feel guilty now.

  110. To Be Honest Guys This is out of Order,, In 2005 They Found The Body Of The Real Michael Jackson Burried Under The Train Tracks At Neverland, They know it was the real Michael Jackson due to dental tests and bone structure. They say the man running around doing all the molesturing is not the real Michael Jackson !!

    So come on guys and girls show some Bloody respect.

  111. funral director have just stated that they will melt michal jackson and turn im in2 a toy so that the children at is funral can play wiv im 4 once

  113. Im glad to see that plastic thing die
    he touched up my little brother ass hole
    I LUV ANAL BEADS

  116. Suck: you are quite retarded, that’s one of the stupidest things I’ve ever heard anyone say. You need to go back to school and learn basic communication skills!

  117. At this moment in time
    im makin love to michael jacksons dead body
    haha
    unlucky gypsy
    ryan hinwood is a bigger bum chum

  118. Michael Jackson passed away this morning from a massive heart attack. Authorities have released a statement saying that they will melt down his body and make plastics toys so children can play with him for a change.

    They have started auctioning Michael Jackson’s belongings, Gary Glitter has just bid a million pounds for his PC.

  119. I bumed a hommo then shot him wid a spunkinator then he got up and sowed himself together wacko jacko come and then said hewllo
    then i chucked him over the river side haha ryan hinwod likes big sucks big willy

  125. The saddest part of this Michael Jackson scandal is that all of this could have been avoided if he just stuck to grabbing his own crotch.”

    What is odd about Micheal Jackson dangling a baby over a balcony?
    A: He normally tosses them off

  127. 1. Rumor has it Jacko wants to be buried at sea and strapped to a couple of buoys…

    2. Los Angeles police have raided Michael Jackson’s Neverland ranch this afternoon. It is being reported that they found Class A drugs in his kitchen, Class B drugs in his bathroom… and Class 4C in his bedroom.

    3. After Michael Jackson’s death this morning, LA county hospital staff are unsure what to do with his remains as plastic recycling day isn’t until next Tuesday.

    4. Michael Jacksons tour promoters have announced the cancellation of his UK dates: Johnny, 7, Tim, 6 and Chris, 3.

  129. undertakers are recycling micheals body to make toys for children, so they can still play with him

  137. Atleast one good thing has come out of michael jacksons death
    they say his body is 80 percent plastic and 20 percent wax
    this means they can just send his corpse straight to madam tussauds

  138. Dude are u like 3 yrs old ? Stick to the subject of MJ!!!!!

    japseye says:
    June 26, 2009 at 3:30 am
    yer ur well small

    down below
    plus u have hairy eyebrows

  139. It is sad when someone who has done so much dies, I just hope in my heart the child abuse claims where unfounded – if they were not he is currrently trying to explain himself to the big red guy.

  143. hahahahahaa poostain legendary jokes,
    michael jackson as asked to be cremated and his ashes put in an etch and sketch so that kids can still play with his knob

  144. aparantly michael jackson hasnt been this stiff since mcauly culkin stayed over

  146. Apparently Michael Jackson told his closest allies he didn’t want to be buried or cremated when he died. It was decided he should be melted down and turned into toys so the kids can play with him for one last time

  147. lol these jokes crack me upp, yeh im sorry about his death and all, but i mainly feel bad for his kids and family, we all know he liked to “play woth kids” and that was sick!

  148. Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and George Best?
    Nothing they’re both dead.

    Whats the similarity between Michael Jackson and George Best?
    Neither of them will decompose.

  149. Q. When is it bedtime at the Neverland Ranch?
    A. When the big hand touches the little hand.

  152. Michael Jackson is going to be melted down and turned into a Playstation so children can finger him for a change.

  153. apparently all the jockeys at the horse racing this weekend will be wearing black armbands in homage to Michael Jackson …

    He has successfully ridden more 3yrs olds than any of them

  155. Rumours that michael jackson had a heart attack are not quite true. the fact is that he was found having a stroke……in the local childrens ward

  156. Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and George Best?
    Nothing they’re both dead.

    Whats the similarity between Michael Jackson and George Best?
    Neither of them will decompose.

  157. on his plastic sugery dd they also change his gender? coz he lukd like so feminine…

    n i wanda wat he’s gna say2the lord, coz he left heaven black, now he went back white

    sadly missed though by da whol world

  158. Q: What was michael jacksons last song?
    A: Don’t blame it on sunshine, don’t blame it on moonlight, don’t blame it on good times blame it on the paramedics

  161. what has michael jackson an an xbox got in common? there both turned on by children

  162. Mcdonalds are to give him a comemorative burger, the mcjackson, 50 yr old meat between 10 yr old buns

    Micheal jacksons last wish was 4 him 2 b melted down and made into plastic party cups so kids can get they’re lips round his rim

    michael jackson has left instructions for his body to be recycled into lego bricks..so that young children can still play with him

    i can go on all day

  163. When Farrah Fawsett arrived at heaven, god granted her 1 wish. She wished all the children to be safe. So god killed Micheal.

  164. As of tonight Michael Jackson Died in a coma. Sky news has released a statement that despite what the medical officials say Michael is not dead… He just turned White again!!!!

  165. Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and Sir Alex Fergusson?

    Sir Alex will be playing Giggs in August.

  168. Bad news for Jacko’s family, apparently the funeral home don’t take plastic!

  170. Michael Jackson went to church and confessed “Forgive me father, for I have sinned with young boys”. The priest replied “It’s OK, I have done it also.”

  171. Farah Fawcett passed away, upon arrival at the pearly gates she was granted one wish, she said “I wish there was away to protect all the children of the world no matter if they are black or white”

  172. Apparently Michael Jackson is not going to be buried or cremated. In his will he said he wants to be made into curry and fed to a bunch of his favourite 10 year olds.
    He just wanted to slip out of their asses one last time.

  173. MY OWN JOKES! 😀

    Famous Last Words; Sha’mon!

    His death is under great speculation. My theory; Hes been hit by. Hes been struck by a smooth criminal.

    Michael Jackson is rumoured to be cremated. They had better wear face masks. Plastic fumes can be lethal.

    Michael Jackson dead!? Thriller…

  174. you racist CRACKERS(becuz i know yall r white) disgust me. This great man is dead and all u people can do is crack jokes? I HOPE EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU BURN IN HELL(bcuz we all know u will). Quit hatin u untalented jealous crackers bcuz this man made more money in a week then u could make in 2 LIFETIMES! you people are filthy scum who dont deserve to live. How could u make fun of sumone because he died. FILTHY SWINE!!!!!!!!!!!!

  175. nonyadamnbusiness says:
    June 26, 2009 at 6:50 am

    you racist CRACKERS(becuz i know yall r white) disgust me. This great man is dead and all u people can do is crack jokes? I HOPE EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU BURN IN HELL(bcuz we all know u will). Quit hatin u untalented jealous crackers bcuz this man made more money in a week then u could make in 2 LIFETIMES! you people are filthy scum who dont deserve to live. How could u make fun of sumone because he died. FILTHY SWINE!!!!!!!!!!!!

    And here’s me think MJ was a white female

  176. the real reason michael jackson died was food poisoning he had 12 year old nuts in his stomach

  177. F*cking grow up! these arn’t even funny! so when he died, you all just decided to jump onto your computers and write jokes that arn’t funny! a legend in music has died and all you can do is just sit on your F*cking @ss’s and write jokes about a great person? honestly i know alot will say “oh he done this””oh he done that” he is still a great man and you people need to grow up!

  178. In response to: nonyadamnbusiness:

    Let’s see, where shall I begin. Crackers? Oh, that’s not a racist comment. Not at all. You know what, you disgust me. What do you think of that? The man blew all of his money and lived beyond his means, just like that ridiculous Michael Vick and let me see, oh yeah, M.C. Hammer. Jackson was a nut, and there is not doubt about it. Get over it. Go on and whine a little more and maybe it will make you feel better.

  179. nonyadamnbusiness, If you dont like it then piss off to another forum. Clearling coming to a Michael Jackson joke thread is exactly what your going to get . Your obviously thick as shit

    nonyadamnbusiness says:
    June 26, 2009 at 6:50 am
    you racist CRACKERS(becuz i know yall r white) disgust me. This great man is dead and all u people can do is crack jokes? I HOPE EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU BURN IN HELL(bcuz we all know u will). Quit hatin u untalented jealous crackers bcuz this man made more money in a week then u could make in 2 LIFETIMES! you people are filthy scum who dont deserve to live. How could u make fun of sumone because he died. FILTHY SWINE!!!!!!!!!!!!

  180. its not all bad jacko is dead. hes goin 2 be melted dwn and made into a slide. that way kids will actually enjoy goin dnw on him.

  181. Courteous? Please.

    I halfway considered cancelling my Internet after seeing the sick jokes about Michael written after his death. It seems the world is filled with hateful, evil people.

    How tragic and sad.

  183. Latest news: Apparently Michael Jackson is not death! Searching Teams are trying to find Neverland!

    “Your music will live forever!”

  184. Glad he is dead he was guilty so the only sad thing is he died at home and not in a jail cell. all u people mourning him and crying need to get a life. He was a pervert and was not a great man.

  185. Seriously i think he will born again! This is the best marketing strategy ever!!! He will come back next week and he will start a World tour with a new album. Im telling you people! 😉

  187. mj was a changling black,white,male,female,alive,dead but i remeber him best when he was on fire…

  189. Breaking news they have just anounced that michael jackson did not die of a heart attack the have found out he died of food poisoning!

    Guess thats what you get for sucking on 8 year old nuts!

  190. MJ was different but dats wat made him great he will live on 4ever in de hearts of his fans nd his music is unpresidented so shut de f*ck up

  191. haha at all these stupid idiots praising the great “king of pop”. all of you clowns forget that this SICK, TWISTED individual forcibly had sexual encounters with children, some of which more than a DECADE below the age of legal consent. yeah yeah yeah, he had no childhood. i couldnt care less. if someone calls you a smackhead for 15-20 years, chances are, you’re taking heroin. if someone calls you a peadophile for 15-20 years, the chances are you’re a rich white piece of plastic who’s able to squirm his way out of legal ramifcations. im glad the sick fker is dead, good riddance.

    RIP, as easy as 1,2,3…

  192. there are rumours stating that michael jackson died of sun cancer , these are false allegations – so don’t blame it on the sunshine.

  193. hay dont get me wrong he was one of the worlds greatest entertainers.
    Freddy mercury being the best in my opinion but its all a laugh we will all remember his great music but yes he was strange and deserves to be laughed at.

  194. How did you know if it was bedtime in the jackson house. when the bug hand touched the little hand

  195. To all you people whinging about the jokes, yes, he’s dead – and so will we all be. So what, human beings need to laugh and if it is death they laugh at, that is all good. Besides Jackson was a weirdo pervert.

  196. OMFG, U R ALL OUT OF ORDER THE PEOPLE WHO TAKE THE PISS OUT OF HIM!
    I MEAN ,HE MANS A LEDGEND!
    DANCE MOVES, SINGING AND EVEN PERFORMING ON LIVE T.V AT THE AGE OF 5 AND HAVING HIS NO.1 HIT SINGLE AT THE AGE OF 11.
    SO SHUT UP!

    X

  197. HERES TO HIM XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

  198. Jasmine says:
    June 26, 2009 at 7:48 am
    OMFG, U R ALL OUT OF ORDER THE PEOPLE WHO TAKE THE PISS OUT OF HIM!
    I MEAN ,HE MANS A LEDGEND!
    DANCE MOVES, SINGING AND EVEN PERFORMING ON LIVE T.V AT THE AGE OF 5 AND HAVING HIS NO.1 HIT SINGLE AT THE AGE OF 11.
    SO SHUT UP!

    X

    ^^ So if Adolf Hitler released a successful pop song prior to WWII; for instance as a child, the subsequent genocide would have been acceptable in your eyes then, yes? Stupid, stupid person. HE. WAS. A. PEADOPHILE.

  199. Michael’s Jackson’s gunna be melted down and turned into Lego bricks so kids can play with him even after he’s dead…

  200. the michael we all loved died a long time ago the one who just died was a whack job going through a midlife crisis and sh*t…some are defending him like they knew him.just coz someone can sing about love and saving the world and what not doesnt make them good so stop the pretence…his music was awsm and all but whos to say he was good.dwell on what you know,his music.
    if you have watched terminator three probably he is going to come back as a robot,watch this space

  202. haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

    Q:What’s the difference between Michael Jackson and Disney films?
    A: Disney films can still touch kids.

    mizzaayyyyy rote thatttt.. lol G.P
    my total commitment! x

  203. to all the faggs out there who miss jacko, i think your all perverts as well. he was a pedo and a fuckin wierd 1 as well. plastic face, skin made white and you people think hes a legend, well fuck you, people cracking the jokes are getting the last laugh, jackos dead……..ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, have moan if you like, ill be laughing at that as well, ha ha ha ha . KEEP THE JACKO JOKES COMING PEOPLE

  206. Whilst trying to revive Jackons heart, the paramedics assistant suggested to his collegue to “Just beat it”.

    lololol!

    When asked what colour coffin they’d like Michael to be placed in, his brothers said “It don’t matter if it’s black or white”

    loloolol!!

  208. …Says the person openly supporting the peadophile. Kinda like the pot calling the kettle black isn’t it? Assuming you don’t understand that metaphor i’ll make it simple for you; you’re dillusional, and no amount of hit songs erases the hurt caused by MJ’s molestation over the course of his life. The world is a better place without him, and that is not even debatable.

  209. whats the diffrence between alex fergoson and micheal jackson alex will be playing giggs next year lol

  211. I have just heard that Childline are cutting their staff…
    The remaining staff are shitting themselves in case something happens to Gary Glitter

    But Gary Glitter’s announced that’s is in good health… in fact he’s just put in an offer for Michael Jackson’s laptop

  212. EVERYONE HERE IS A BOLDY FUDGE PAKER IM GLAD HE DIED SO HE CAN FINGER LITTLE GIRLS AND BOYS IN HEAVEN

  213. in response to nonyadamnbusiness –

    You’re right – he made more money than I ever will. Which of course makes it OK to molest kids. And thank God he made all that money, or he would have actually been punished for it like us lowly “filthy swine” would have. You support him – you support his behavior. Sorry dude, the jokes I’ve heard are about him molesting kids, not being black. YOU brought that into it. Bravo!!

  214. he wasnt a pedo a hipnotist proved that!
    the jokes are funnny but there wasnt anything wrong with him

  215. Cracker Jackson – you couldn’t be any more correct. MJ’s endless pot of money got him out of trouble more often than I imagine anyone will ever know. Beyond the legal fees and the options available to him, I would feel very confident in stating that MJ most likely paid off numerous families in order for their cooperation (silence, regarding the molestation of their children). That stupid fk, “nonyadamnbusiness” is clearly like the majority of the black community in supporting MJ regardless of his actions, simply because when he popped out he was a n*gger. Something he subsequently forgot about, and began his new life as a white peadophile. Do they honestly think MJ would defend them were the situations reversed? Ahhh, the stupidity of it all.

  216. Micheal Jackson’s ghost has already been spotted in his local childrens hospital, typical, hasnt been dead 12 hours and he’s already putting the willies up the kids

  218. Cracker Jacksons right; nonyadamnbusiness pulls the race card like a fool.

    Aint nothing going on but good quality sick humour going down here at a dead pedo’s expense, if you don’t like it stop reading posts titled (in case you missed it – Dumb ass) “Top Michael Jackson Jokes” – Jezz what the hell do u all expect people ?. let the jokes flow and quit hatin’ the fun makers; thats why 90% of us are reading this ;P

    If your not hear for tha jokes then y’all should go blow bubbles. . .

  224. Micheal Jackson Died At 3.15 What A Coinserdance The Big Hand Was Touching The Little Hand

  225. ita bit of a coincident that jake binding is on the same page as another ped0file haha lol
    eat dog poo pringles

  233. u all suck michale jackson was a big hero of mine and a legand nd he will cum back and fiddle with all of ya

  237. its ok all you people that love michael

    Michael Jackson is going to be re-cycled into carrier bags….
    So he can remain, white, plastic… and dangerous to kids!

  238. all is good

    Madonna has said she’d be happy to adopt MJ’s kids… “it doesn’t matter if they’re Black or White!”

  239. Reports that he was having a heart attack in the ambulance are incorrect; he was actually in the children’s ward, having a stroke!

  240. The spelling these days is just not upto scratch, earllier Jacko was refered to as being a nonse – my god he would be turning in his grave if they could have dug a hole quick enough.

    Anyway, the correct term is “nonce” which to the uninitiated is an acronym for label associated with pedo’s in the English judicial system and stands for (Not Of Normal Criminal Element) ie dirty child molesting git who only got away with it cos he was rich. . . eat shit you jacko lovers he was a sexual predator of the lowest order.

  241. The spelling these days is just not upto scratch, earllier Jacko was refered to as being a nonse – my god he would be turning in his grave if they could have dug a hole quick enough.

    Anyway, the correct term is “nonce” which to the uninitiated is an acronym for label associated with pedo’s in the English judicial system and stands for (Not Of Normal Criminal Element) ie dirty child molesting git who only got away with it cos he was rich. . . eat sh!t you jacko lovers he was a sexual predator of the lowest order.

  242. Because his body is already 99% plastic, instead of cremating him, they are going to melt him down, and use him to make lego bricks. That way, the younger generation can enjoy playing with him for a change.

  243. After Michael Jaskson’s death police inspected his house and found class A drugs in his bathroom, class B drugs in his kitchen and Class 5C in his bedroom

  245. What’s the difference between Michael Jackson and Alex Ferguson ?

    Ferguson will be playing Giggs in august

  246. I calculated it takes a plastig bag 42 years to decompose on those findings Michael Jackson will be with us for another 4.2 million years

  247. McDonalds will unveil the McJackson Burger today – a 50 year old piece of albino meat between two 8 year old buns!!!

  250. Im not saying the guy is a saint or anything but, the guy just died! however he turned out later in his life you should still give the man a little respect for atleast a DAY before you start crackin all the jokes. And to honest with you if he was such a pedo why didnt he do a Gary glitter and travel to Thailand for some by lovin??? it would be alot easier for him and he had the money to remain out of the public eye. Think about it abit!

    RIP M.Jackson I hope you find some peace in the next life.

  251. As we all know we lost a great hero today,Farrah Fawcett.
    Well when Farrah Fawcett went to heaven because she was sooo beautiful god said to her “Farrah, we will allow you one wish.” Farrah Thought long and hard about this untill she finally exclaimed, “I wish that all the children in the world would be safe!” so god killed Michael Jackson.

  252. Did you hear that due to the fact the Michael Jackson was 99% plastic…he will be melted down into legos so little boys can play with him for a change.

  253. he wud b a melestorer cause its how he felt i wud chris benoit kill him and his family wen he is famous but he did it still. and luv sum of the jokes

  254. The doctors were working all day to find how michael died and finally, they blamed it on the boogie

    Whats 8 inches and completely useless…. a ticket to michael jacksons comeback tour

  255. Laura Davidson: “he wasnt a pedo a hipnotist proved that!” Are you out of your mind!! That’s too funny! That’s hypnotist by the way, hYpnotist.

  256. Thankfully he finally died. This freak show is rich and famous so the loser gets a free pass on being a total sicko and still has fans. Unbelievable. I thought it was good to see some jokes.

    Did you know JC Pennys is having a sale in memory of Michael Jackson? 1/2 off all boys underwear.

  257. it has been announced that following the death of micheal jackson, the charity, save the children, are funding his funeral

  260. I was never a fan of Micheal Jackson. When I was young, I did like his music, but I’ve always thought he was SOOOOO weird!!!! And a person would have to be a total fool not to believe he molested children and paid the parents off. The guy just reeked of CREEPY.

    Still, he is the type of person who it is hard to imagine being dead. It is hard for me to wrap my mind around that.

    I bet right about now, he is learning just how important those children are to God.

  265. fukkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu you dam child molester

  268. If Jesus raped Michael Jackson, would that not make him qeer? Hmm. He will live in death as he lived his life.

  270. i hate sites like these. even though as he got older, he did some things that were weird and strange but he is the king of pop. clearly the ppl who made these jokes dont understand what he did for the music world. he was a legend and hid death will probbaly over shadow elvis’s death bc he changed the music world. i know he isnt like a miricle worker but he also just died. i think this is terrible.

    R.I.P Michael Jackson

  272. Q. What have Latoya Jackson and Australia have in common?
    A. They will both be taking the Ashes home this summer!

    NEWSFLASH: Jacko to be cremated and sprinkled into a curry, so those kids can feel him go through there arse one more time, who’s bad?

    Reports from Michael Jacksons coroner confirms that he hasn’t been this stiff since Macaulay Culkin stayed over.

    They are going to recycle Michael Jackson into a space-hopper because he was made of so much plastic… Its the kids turn to ride him

    Michael Jackson has just been refused entry into heaven… Don’t blame it on the sunshine…….Don’t blame it on the moonlight…….Dont’ blame it on the good times……….Blame it on the buggery

  273. MolleyBabay you hate sites like this your crazy he molested little kids that piece oh crap touched boys king of pop yes and the king of touching little kids and getting away with it…r.ip hahahah more like rest in s**t

  274. King of pop? ‘Pop Culture’… isn’t that an oxymoron? Michael Jackson had some good music in the late 70’ and early 80’s and then he went off the deep end. All this BS about pop icon etc etc — shows how absolutely screwed up our culture is.

  275. Weather or not you believe it was a shakedown for his money many years ago. This grown man had children, not his own, children sleeping in his bed.
    The parents should be charged to for putting them into that “position”. Excuse the pun.

  276. “MolleyBabay you hate sites like this your crazy he molested little kids that piece oh crap touched boys king of pop yes and the king of touching little kids and getting away with it…r.ip hahahah more like rest in s**t”

    Haven’t you ever heard of punctuation? Things like commas and full stops? I guess not….

  277. NOTE: Inappropriate commments will be removed. Please be courteous to others.

    done.

  281. Michael Jackson is a B***h,
    You a trip brother. Michael is more appropriate to give MJ his just deserts. Crackin up.

  282. m.j’s body will be melted down and sprinkled on childrens currys so that the children wont miss m.j going through their arse!! WTF connor this is s**t!!

    its bad hes dead but seriously why search m.j jokes if you dont like them. Its just like eating a nut when your elergic. common sence people!!

  291. Dude … why would you like to see Jesus raping Michael Jackson??? Maybe God’ll kill you next, Michael Jackson is Son, not because you said so many stupid things … just because you’re obnoxious …

    and for the record, Michael touched little boys.

  292. thats mess he dead u guys are races and immurture who ever wrote this can go to…………….. you guys are so mean.
    Q:What has 18 balls and 3 pubic hairs?
    A: A Michael Jackson slumber party.

    Q: Did you know they’re putting out a Michael Jackson stamp?
    A: Fans get to vote for the white or black Michael Jackson.

    Q: What’s brown and often found in a baby’s diaper?
    A: Michael Jackson’s hand.

    R.I.P MJ WE LOVE YOU

  293. thats mess he dead u guys are races and immurture who ever wrote this can go to…………….. you guys are so mean.

    R.I.P MJ WE LOVE YOU

  294. Molly and RicHARD Wilkins might just top themselves to be with him . Out of something good comes something better

  296. idont know much about mj but i think its kinda creepy he
    went from black to white

  297. hey cathy

    “Rest in peace michael I love you no matter what you do.”

    no matter what you do ? do you love gary glitter aswell ?

  298. hey maya, races is spelled racist. I loved MJ music and color was NEVER an issue for me. When you start doing inappropriate things with a child in your bedroom, thats NOT being racist, its being a moral human being. He may never have had his day is court because he paid out the money. Just read the court documents. His OWN WORDS, “I SLEPT IN THE BED WITH CHILDREN”.
    There is nothing wrong with some humor at his weirdness.

  300. The person hu is michael jackson is a b***h
    go ffuk urslef u ffukin little pprick
    go ffuk ur nan u lil ccunt
    and u shove bananas up ur ass
    u ffukin monkey lovin wwanker

  301. what does michael jackson and maxwell house have in common? they’re both good to the last drop

  303. he wasn’t weird , strawberries and mash potato is weird , he was a freak and he KNEW exactly what he was doing. !!

    pay ouy $20 million when you are innocent ??? yeah right !!

    MJ RIP Rest In Piss

  308. Give The Guy A Break I Dnt Beleve He Was A Pedo I Just Think He Wanted To Give Children The Childhood He Never Had And Yeah These Jokes Might Be Funni But He Wud Be Turnin In His Grave Hes Been Dead For 24 Hours Give It A Rest

  310. the internet, which the majority of us didnt have growing up is FULL of information. You need to decide which information is important to you. Your still too young to understand the way the world works. Educate yourself.
    If your lucky, you will learn more then what the current school system provide today.

    ****************************************************************

    Why is Michael Jackson like Kmart?
    Both have boys’ underwear half off.

  312. Tara get real !!

    he was a pedo , paid $20 million dollars too a kid to keep him quiet !!

    innocent ? yeah right he knew what he was up to

  314. YEah KARMA…

    What kind of Karma does Michael Jackson get? What kind of Karma does the doctor that gave Michael the Demerol shot yesterday. This coctor has skipped town. Any surprise?

  315. i cant believe people can be sooo mean and enjoy these jokes. they’re so disrespectful. he has given us soo much and all u do is leave him horrible jokes. he is the greatest singer of all time, in history, hes a legand. he always be remembered. sooo what if he was a suspected child molestorer, we have all done things we reget and that were wrong. he is an angel now in peace, away from all this evil. we will always love u MJ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXxxxxxxxxxxxx

  318. Michael Jackson’s at heavens gate and St Peter come up to him, tells him heaven ready for him because of all the great things he has done in life & all the people he’s touched. Then Michael says don’t forget the kids.

  320. I guess it is okay for you to take YOUR children to his house for sleepovers HUH????

    Amazing, just simply amazing. Jello with cat food for brains.

  322. this jokes arent even funny. theyre just mean. give it a rest and show some respect for him and his family. dont yu think theyre going through enough. if u lyk these jokes, your sick !!!!!!!!!!!!

  323. what’s 6″ long and of no use whatsoever ?

    My sisters Michael Jackson comeback tour ticket !!

  327. According to Web Usage Associates (and Public Notary), the following ten Michael Jackson Jokes are the most popular with Americans.

    This would INCLUDE his family. Even Joe the Fist Jackson

  329. Q: what’s the diffrence between Disney films and
    A: Disney films can still touch little kids haha

    I hope ur in hell gettin raped by the devil.

  330. Get Real Please Yhur On Here Makin Jokes Up About Him When Hes Been Dead Not Even 24 Hrs So If Yhur Gunna Think Yhu Know Everything Get It Right Brush Up On Yhur Knowledege About That Case Yhull Find That The Dada Was Lying And Give It A While Itll All Come Out Because They Must Feel Guilty For Giving Him A Bad Name Now That Hes Dead

    R.I.P Micheal Jackson

  333. Whats the difference in now and at 315PST today? Jokes are jokes and opinions are opinions. Everyone has one.

  334. God has provided a special place in Heaven for Michael Jackson; far away from the little boys.

  338. Ok, for those of you who are saying these jokes are mean, why the heck are you on this website? Karma will take affect on ou for even being here.

    I’m just here because I think humor is the best cure for sadness.
    And trust meh, I WOULD KNOW.

  340. I’m just here because I think humor is the best cure for sadness.
    **********************************************************
    HEAR HEAR!!! It had to be said.

  342. Farrah got to the pearly gates and could here MJ screaming , whats that she asked st peter , oh thats just michael getting holes drilled for his halo , screaming again , my god said farrah why is he screaming now , st peter replied oh he;s just having holes drilled for his wings , buggger this said farrah i’m off to hell, not a good idea said peter you will be raped and bugggered , yeah said farrah but at least i already have the holes for that

  344. peeps you’ll like this one!
    So, michael jackson is dead…. do you think Madeline Mcann will finally stop hiding from him? x

  346. omg give him a break he had sex with little boys he should have stayed in his brother’s band he sounded way better =)

  349. When Farrah Fawcett died yesterday and went to heaven, God told her that she could have one wish. Farrah said she wanted all the little children to be safe. So God killed Michael Jackson.

  350. Q: what does micheal jackson have in commen with a playststion
    A:there both made of pastic and get turned on by kids

  351. they said michael had so much plastic surgery they were going to melt him down and mold him into legos, that way the kids could play with him for a change..

  352. I think mj was a good singer no matter what happened with that boy and i think its even worst the parents took the money your kids should come first not sticking up for mj about that but hes only just died RIP god bless great bloke or my love and respect for his children and family x x x

  353. tbh, i know we shouldn’t joke about death
    but c’mon, it happens don’t it
    people have their different tastes
    yeah, the jokes are cleverly thought of
    but we shouldnt be moaning at the people who made them
    its only a bit of fun
    half the time its just because they want to make people laugh
    not to degrade him

  354. im not been funny or enything but
    i am only 13 but i have a opinion and
    its harsh whaat you are doing ?
    michael jackson event pop music ,
    you may think he got what he deserved
    but the press and newws , chat crab
    they twist everything .
    i love michael jackson .
    his musics amazng , hee works the moon walk
    bye .x

  357. fuckin sick cunt he is im glad hes dead fuckin hope he chokes on his own cock he wont of had bad luck if he wernt a kiddy fifler

  358. he was a pedo raping littel boys…… they said michael had so much plastic surgery they were going to melt him down and mold him into legos, that way the kids could play with him for a change..

  359. these jokes are hilarious.
    yes he might b gone but oh well, people die, he was going to soon anyway.
    live with it!

  360. Farrah got to the pearly gates and could here MJ screaming , whats that she asked st peter , oh thats just michael getting holes drilled for his halo , screaming again , my god said farrah why is he screaming now , st peter replied oh he;s just having holes drilled for his wings , fuck this said farrah i’m off to hell, not a good idea said st peter you will be raped and sodomized, yeah said farrah but at least i already have the holes for that

  361. `Did you hear about Michael Jackson’s toaster?
    ~The bread goes in brown, and comes out white.

  362. he kept having plastic surgery in the hope jordi and his mates mums wouldn’t recognize him

  363. I never ever met such a colourful character as mj
    hes a great singer and will be saddly missed
    R.I.P all my love and respect its hard to loose someone so close
    form mj biggest fan x x god bless x x

  364. oh and i have the best joke ever:

    Q: what did michael jackson say when he was rushed to hospital?
    A: can i b in the childrens ward please?

    u must admit, that one is hilarious!

  368. im 13 u r sutch a bastard excuse my language.. how dare you say something about a man whos been threw sutch a rough time family problems , done for child abuse (wasnt true) , court cases. all he wanted was world peace. he proberblygot plastic surgery because of racist people like you who use to bully him you ever heard his songs even though im 13 ive realised all of his songs had a kind of message. black and whites about the races , there was that 1 about the world what its turning into. he was lonely and i really feel sorry for him he was also stressed also give a lil respect for the dead (but your proberbly happy). evil people these days n ohhhhhhhh yeah remember this he used to let poor kids into never land and sed they could stay as long as they want that is not child abuse he was the man who neva wanted to grow up. LET HIM REST IN PEACE

  369. `What’s the difference between Mr. Potato Head and Michael Jackson?
    ~Michael Jackson has had more noses

  370. oh shut up chunk he was so lonely had a bad life and was not found guilty for child abuse in the end hes dead if u die tomoro would you like people talkin bout you

  372. OHHHHHHHHHHHH rrrrrrrrrr i hope he hauntz u real bad leave the guy alone he doesnt even no u

  375. micheal died cause of people like u im 13 but im sooo upset he was a legand and this will neva be forgotten

  376. micheal jackson had to cancel his upcoming dates,
    supposed to be with david (age 8) and thomas (age 10)

  377. A confused nine year old boy goes up to his mother and asks, “Is God male or female?” After thinking for a moment, his mother responds, “Well, God is both male and female.”This confuses the little boy so he asks, “Is God blackor white?””Well, God is both black and white.”This further confuses the boy so he asks, “Is God gay or straight?”At this the mother is getting concerned, but answers none the less, “Honey, God is both gay and straight.”At this, the boy’s face lights up with understanding and he triumphantly asks, “Is God Michael Jackson?”

  378. Breaking news, Michael Jackson did NOT die of a heart attack. He died of food poisoning. They found 12 year old NUTS in his stomach.

  379. yea yea yea, micahel jackson had a bad life. so has most of the people in this world. deal with it yea. he’s dead now! no point greeving you fools! it’s a joke page TWATS! if you wanna cry & argue over him, fancy going to his grave to do it? (: NAAAAAAA!!

  380. hahah this page is brill hes a pure pedo y did he give some1 $20 million dollars outa court settlement if he wasnt guilty ? uz need tae get a grip man hes a pedo non stop and hes ugly man am glad hes died 😀 bubbiii xxx

  381. wtf all of yuh quys r fckn ridiculous omq the man is dead would yuh b sittinq here crackinqqjoke if it was ur mom that died? ya didnt think so wth did m.j do 2 any of yuh nd in case yuh didnt no hes not quilty ok he slept with as fckn lil kid im pretty sure theres millions of boys whop have 2 sleep 2qether yuh quys dnt even kno who the boy was the culdve been rel8de ior sumthinq so all of yuh jerokffs need 2 qo check ur facts u assholes ns any tht has sumthinq 2 say speak up

  382. if the nonce had gone to jail he would probbly still be alive, good job he was found not guilty. makes the world safer for all our children. dead peado always a reason to celebrate

  383. farrah fawcett went to heaven and god granted her one wish. she wanted all the children of the world to be safe so god killed michael jackson

  384. all the jockeys are wearing black arm bands at tomorrows race meetings, in tribute to jacko who rode more 3 year olds than all the rest of them

  385. He was originally rushed to a childrens hospital where he had a little stroke.

    Tomorrow all the riders in the local horse race will wear black in tribute to somebody who rode more three year olds than anybody else.

    At the end he will be melted into PS3 controllers so kids can still play.

  386. I wish that everyone would just leave Michael Jackson alone. Even if he did do anything to that boy, he should be remembered for the good things he did, and not the bad! RIP MICHAEL!!!

  387. Wow, I see literacy skills are not needed on this site!

    Following his death I guess that only leaves Santa unloading his sack around kids. He always loved kids, the big hand on the little hand was bed time at the ranch!

  388. Tell us all about the good thing Tori! Hope you do not need too much space…

    The freak is gone, get over it.

  389. Since he’s 99% percent plastic, his remains will go to the Lego factory so little kids can still play with him.

  391. ‘lf2001’ your a dick, sorry it had to be said.

    i love sick jokes! but micheal jackson Wasent a pedo! if he was surely he would have been convicted?

    any way apparently he dident die of a heart attack he just had a little stroke in the childrens ward!

  395. He was a tool for media, “built” to be a whore for the media from a very early age. So whatever, crack away and make jokes. That was his life

  398. why was michael jackson crying ?

    because someone nicked his chewits and his polo’s

  399. where did all the racists go i mean i havent heard a black guy calling all whites crackers and racists since this morning because if you say something about a pedo you must be a racist cause he was black

  400. what does michael jackson have in common with a clown-

    they both wear makeup and attract little boys

  401. investigators are drawing closer to the actual cause of Michael Jackson’s death. They’ve ruled out the sunshine, the moonlight and even the good times. It appears they’re blaming it on the boogie…

  403. Why were Michael Jackson’s pants so small?
    They belonged to the last kid in line else.

  404. Whats the difference between sir alex ferguson and michael jackson?

    Sir alex ferguson will be playing giggs next year

    Some people though that michael jackson died of cardiac arrest others believe that he had a stroke walking down the childrens ward in hospital

  405. Why did Michael Jackson run to K Mart?
    Because he heard little boys pants were half off!

  406. Whats the difference between michael jackson and alex fergurson?
    Fergie will be playing gigs in august

  407. whats the difference between michael jackson and sir alex ferguson

    one will be playing giggs this summer

  409. Jacko’s last wishes were to be cremated and put in an etcha sketck, that way little kiddies can still fiddle with his knob!

  410. f all yuh ppl yuh hav no hearts @ all I bet yuh if ur mothers were dead yuh wouldn’t b makinq fun them so lv m.j alone!!!

  411. Every one who says these michael jackson jokes are little imature arseholes.Thats what Michael would of wanted!!

  412. My joke is the best not about the fact he dead tho i got three first two are shit though:

    Why did micheal jackson want his ashes to be put in a sand pit….. So then he can always touch little kids.

    Unfortunately micheal jack has got to be recycled by law because he is over 80 percent plastic.
    and now for the good one:…. What is the same about micheal jackson and an xbox 360? …There both plastic and it is mostly kids who turn them on.

  415. lozza you dumb fukwit . he wasn’t convicted cos he settled outa court you muppet,, $20 million and he was innocent ? fuk off you knob

  416. When Farrah Fawcet got to heaven god granted her one wish… she wished that all the children would be safe, so god killed Michael Jackson

  418. The recession is really hitting everyone hard, even the Jackson 5 had to let one go…

  419. Reports said that Jacko was killed by a pushchair but police say it’s too early to blame it on the buggy.

  420. i think its dumd how ppl get all workd up over him dieing…yeah its sad…but it wasnt like the presdent dieing….get over it!!

  422. People are wanting MJ’s coffin to be left open before they bury him, so that kids can see him stiff for one last time.

  423. It’s Gary glitter, that’s gained the most out of Jacko’s death.

    Michael left him his photo album….

  428. yea yea these jokes are good but i think people are making a to big of fuss out of it. its all over newspapers yes fare enough he wasfamous but more people loved my grandad who died and i dont see any mention on him on the tv or out. i think people are going krakers over a kiddy fidler, should of been put down a long time ago, and he pleads non guilty. haha
    i have 1 last thing to say to you; evidence mate xx
    RIP jakko

  431. thank god for morphine, pity it wasn’t used on him years ago good ridance to bad rubbish

  432. whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a playstation?…
    They’re both plastic and kids turn them on.

  434. apparently its all a big misunderstanding, he didnt suffer a heart failure, hes fine
    he just went to the childrens ward for a little stroke

  435. what is the difference between michael jacksin and acne? acne waits till you 13 to cum on your face…….

  439. Your a Nastyy people,
    michael jacksonn was a wonderful singer and dancerr,
    so talented but it doesnt matter about his personal life, true or falsee!
    Leavee him alonee ,
    you are being so disrespectful,

    R.I.P jACKOO

    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  440. You’ve gotta hand it to the guy who successfully lived the life of a Scooby-Doo villain. Hanging around an abandoned theme park wearing a plastic face…. And he did it well too, he actually managed to catch “those pesky kids”! 😀

  441. The music at his funeral/memorial should be “I’m forever blowing bubbles” hahaha

    Oh btw “princess” you wouldn’t be defending him so much if it was your brown-eye he had his fingers in!

  445. wats wrong wiv michael jackson leave him alone u bullys it wud be diffrent if it was u lot who died i hope he comes nd haunts u or somert any way i talked 2 his family and his mum say we will jus have 2 beat it

  446. learn how 2 spell people!! And get over the death!! And aint nobody bulling him..how can u bully someone when they r dead?? MJ was a werid person!

  447. theses jokes aint even funny its sick hes just died and all you lot can think about is making fun of him its sad he werent even a pedofile he was just trying to help the kids live their life as kids coz he didnt get a chance! you lot just grow up isi x

  448. fletch says:
    June 26, 2009 at 5:04 pm
    wats wrong wiv michael jackson leave him alone u bullys it wud be diffrent if it was u lot who died i hope he comes nd haunts u or somert any way i talked 2 his family and his mum say we will jus have 2 beat it

    WOW, you talked to his family?

    on a seperate note the word gullible was removed from the dictionary today

    if he didnt have the money he would have been beaten a long time ago, in prison

  449. Ok you retards the title of this page is “michael jackson jokes” therefore this page contains…. You guessed it! Jokes about michael jackson! So all you self-righteous paedo loving fucknuggets can go fuck right off. I’m gonna take the piss outta him and, evidently, so are a lot of other people. You’re completely wasting your time by trying to defend him on this page so, to the next person thinking of telling us all to lay off him, hit the “back” button in your browser now and go and find a site that actually gives a shit.

  450. Kelly says:
    June 26, 2009 at 5:13 pm
    theses jokes aint even funny its sick hes just died and all you lot can think about is making fun of him its sad he werent even a pedofile he was just trying to help the kids live their life as kids coz he didnt get a chance! you lot just grow up isi x

    kids dont live their lives drinking “jesus juice” watching porn and being groped

  451. Dan says:
    June 26, 2009 at 4:40 pm
    The music at his funeral/memorial should be “I’m forever blowing bubbles” hahaha

    Oh btw “princess” you wouldn’t be defending him so much if it was your brown-eye he had his fingers in!

    Nice one Dan 🙂

  452. you lot wouldnt like it if us lot were making jokes about your mum or someone you knew who had died so just grow up isit

  453. One man goes to another and says did you know micheal jackson is dead?? the other replies Yes, they should melt him, and then turn him into a toy, that way kids can play with him for a change

    Its just a joke i heard

    R.I.P Micheal Jackson

  454. Kelly says:
    June 26, 2009 at 5:23 pm
    you lot wouldnt like it if us lot were making jokes about your mum or someone you knew who had died so just grow up isit

    LOL “so just grow up isit”

  456. tbh people the jokes are good right just sum F**kers are takin it to far with MJ like ana he was a good dancer and singer just had a f**ked up life with kids haha

  458. all of those jokes make me sick. And if any of you found any of them funny you are sick and need help.

  460. a large group of children have gathered at the gates of neverland. Police say they’ll let them out just as soon as the find a locksmith

  461. When Farrah Fawcett arrived at the Pearly Gates, God commended her for leading such an honest life and asked what He could do for her in return.

    Farrah asked God to simply make sure the children of the world were safe.

    Five minutes later, Michael Jackson dropped dead.

  462. They r jus jokes..get over it!! if u dont like it dont read it!!!
    and kelly u say that we wouldnt like it if ppl was makein jokes if our mom died…well if one of our moms died i dont think it would be all over the news!!

  463. McDonalds have bought out a new Jacko burger to commemorate Michael Jackson’s life. It consists of a 50 year old piece of meat between two 7 year old buns.

  464. whats the difference between micael jackson and farrah fawcett?
    about 3 hours

  466. tht gyal hu sed she was 13
    so am i
    i fink the jokes am gr8 yano laffin soo much
    he was a gr8 singa n danc sure
    but wot he did 2 lil kidz
    surely yuh wudn’t want him cumin n doin wot he did 2 yuh wot he did 2 them
    i hope his family r alryt
    but c’mon it ent sad its jst a bit of fun
    but people am makin 2 much fuss
    wendy richards dent ge this much fuss now did she???

  467. The story that michael jackson was taken to the UCLA medical centres cardiac ward for heart attack is a total fabrication. The New York times have just released a story that he was actually seen at the peadiatric ward having a stroke.

  468. The autopsy report came out today, and they annouced the cause of Michael Jacksons death. It was food poisioning…. He ate a 9 year old wenner!

  469. Notorious McG if u ever say the “N” word again…i will make sure it’s the last word u make. u got that!!!!!!!!

  470. wow, if you read back, the wiener joke has been said like 30 times already, come on people, lets get some fresh ones here!

  471. The coroner has dispelled the idea that michael jackson died as a result of a heart attack. He has concluded that michael jackson died as a result of choking on a small bone.

  473. wots the difference between frankie dettori and MJ? frankie will be riding 3 year olds this summer!

    Jacko goes to heaven and is met by St Peter who refuses him entry. MJ says why can’t i come in. St Peter replies don’t blame it on the sunshine, dont blame it on the moonlight, dont blame it on the good times, blame it on the buggery!!!

  474. Did you hear Wal-Mart had a sale today for Michael Jackson’s career? All little boys pants were 1/2 off…..Breaking News Michael Jackson’s cause of death…has been ruled accidental…Jon and Kate asked him to babysit and he overdosed on viagra. Why are we celebrating A MOLESTORS CAREER?

  476. Knock Knock
    Who’s there?
    Little Boy Blue
    Little Boy Blue Who?
    Michael Jackson

  479. Saw this one:
    Q:Why isn’t all the controversy bothering Michael?
    A:He doesn’t mind reaching bottom.
    Then I thought of this one
    Q:Why isn’t all the controversy bothering Michael?
    A:He’s DEAD!!!!
    ROFLMAO

  480. I just like to say that all of u who take the piss death of michael Jackson are twats And I’m gunna piss on ur face and laugh wen u die…. Wud u like that? X

  481. did you hear what they planned on doing with michael jackson’s ashes? tthey are going to scatter them all over a 10 yr old boys face.

  483. The Pope has issued a proclamation on Michael Jackson. If he hears any more allegations about little boys, the Pope says he’ll have no choice but to make him a priest.

  484. all of us who take the piss death of michael jackson??? WTF?? That doesnt even make sense retard!

    I understand that Micheal decided to have a boy of his own because it was too expensive to rent them at $2 Million a pop.

  485. Saw this one:
    Why doesn’t Michael sleep with boys anymore?
    He’s tired of all the cracks.
    Thought of this one:
    Why doesn’t Michael sleep with boys anymore?
    He’s DEAD!
    Still ROFLMAO

  486. all of us who take the piss death of michael jackson??? WTF?? That doesnt even make sense retard!

    I understand that Micheal decided to have a boy of his own because it was too expensive to rent them at $2 Million a pop. I AGREE 100 percent to that…

  487. good one OJ! I havent laughed this hard in years, i swear! MJ dying is the funniest thing thats happened to the world in a long time. Everyone should be celebrating the death of a child molestor celebrity scumbag!

  488. bwahahaha.. michael jackson jokes are apt.. another freak child molestor gets his.

  490. `What’s the difference between Mr. Potato Head and Michael Jackson?
    ~Michael Jackson has had more noses.

  492. Why did Michael invite MacCauly Caulkin to the house?
    ~He’s like the little boy he never had.

  493. `WHAT DID MICHAEL JACKSON SAY WHEN HE GOT BACK TO NEVERLAND RANCHFROM DRUG REHAB?
    ~ YOU KNOW, I FEEL LIKE A NEW BOY!

  494. What are Michael Jackson’s favorite sayings?
    1) There’s a sucker born every minute.
    2) Kids do the darndest things.
    3) Tricks are for kids.
    ROFLMAO

  495. A confused nine year old boy goes up to his mother and asks, “Is God male or female?” After thinking for a moment, his mother responds, “Well, God is both male and female.”This confuses the little boy so he asks, “Is God blackor white?””Well, God is both black and white.”This further confuses the boy so he asks, “Is God gay or straight?”At this the mother is getting concerned, but answers none the less, “Honey, God is both gay and straight.”At this, the boy’s face lights up with understanding and he triumphantly asks, “Is God Michael Jackson?”
    ROTFFSLMAO

  497. Ok children grow up already!!! I stumbled on this chat and it appears that you guys have nothing better to do than use the death of MJ to come out of your holes in your pathetic bedrooms and bash him.

    He’ll be the one smiling when you get up (or don’t get up there)!!

  498. Two paramedics arrive at Michael Jackson’s to answer the 911 call,
    the first asks the second what they should try first.
    To which the second replies, “well I don’t know about you but I reckon the ferris wheel”.

  499. Actually, you’re right. I have nothing better to do than bash Michael Jackson all day. This is the most entertaining thing to do right now. Besides, if you believe in heaven or hell or those sorts of ghost stories, wouldnt he go to HELL considering he was a child molestor? Im not a cristian or anything, but im pretty sure the rules are if you rape small children you go to hell, right? Correct me if im wrong…

  501. You guys are so gay your so mean to someone whos just died. i mean wtf im gonna make jokes about you twats when you die.

  502. hey stupid who posted this comment….Ok children grow up already!!! I stumbled on this chat and it appears that you guys have nothing better to do than use the death of MJ to come out of your holes in your pathetic bedrooms and bash him.

    He’ll be the one smiling when you get up….got that wrong…he smiled when he got it up for A 10 YEAR OLD… (or don’t get up there I WOULDN’T GET IT UP FOR A TEN YR OLD)!! REMEMBER ONE THING I DIDNT HAVE SEXUAL RELATIONS WITH YOUNG CHILDREN LIKE YOUR BOY MICHAEL…

  503. You guys are so gay your so mean to someone whos just died. i mean wtf im gonna make jokes about you twats when you die……YOUR BOY MICHAEL DIDN’T LIKE TWATS….HE LIKE WIENER 15 YEARS AND YOUNGER

  505. Look, a child molestor just died, BE HAPPY! And besides, if you support him so much, why are you on a site for michael jackson jokes. I know you’re all laughing deep down inside. I understand, you all have to pretend to be good people and mourn the death of another human cause death makes you uncomfortable and you’re still scared of it. Thats ok, a scumbag child molestor just died, be HAPPY!

  506. Hey Funny Man or Mr Funny Man or Funny Name … what proof do YOU have that he is a child molester? because the media said so? They paint him as mysterious and weird, and now they’re making millions off his death … that is how STINKY the media is and all those who have no SOUL but to bash another HUMAN BEING!!. You’re sick and need help badly. Being jealous of MJ …. that’s too late … GET A LIFE!!

  507. besides, make jokes about me, i didnt molest children, wont have enough media coverage for it for you to know when i die, plus, I’LL BE DEAD. I WONT KNOW THE GODDAMNED DIFFERENCE!

  508. I hear he is 95% plastic so they are going to be melting him down into lego blocks so kids will be able to play with him.

  509. im definately not jealous. i have no interest in little boys. If he wasnt guilty, then why did he pay??? Innocent people dont hand out money and apologies. I dont think he was human anyways, more like some crazy plastic sculpture that got possesed, or some AI put into it…

  510. Alrigh, for all of you complainers…You know whats going on here, so instead of reading it, getting all pissy and writing your comments to try to act like you are better than everyone else, just leave. Exit the site. Then don’t return. Not everybody loved MJ. If you did…or still do…this is not the place for you. I personally think they should put a plastic mold of him up in the rock n roll hall of fame. Shouldn’t be that hard to do…

  511. (AP) It has been revealed that Michael Jackson’s final wish was to be cremated, and his ashes put into Etch-A-Sketches…..so children could continue playing with him for years to come

  512. yeah, and I was sleeping on a chair and had this dream to check out this blog. MJ told me to speak with you … you think thriller is scary … watch how you sleep tonight …. hmmm … you talk so much about little boys, you must be a molester. And yes he paid off to protect his career and at the advise of his legal team, your moron!! Don’t be a sucker to everything you hear. Now go back into your hole and cry all night!!

  513. exactly what i said earlier, if you support him so much, why go on a website that has jokes about him??? you already know what the context is gonna be. stop trying to ruin everyones fun and go mourn with CNN

  514. Hey Mike, this is a free country … oops free international blog … don’t tell anyone to leave or exit … are you a FOOL! I’m having fun watching you boys play with each other … LOL!!

  515. MISS LISA RESPONSE.. what proof do YOU have that he is a child molester?A) I WOULD OF FOUGHT TO MY LAST TOOTH AND NAIL TO PROVE MY INNOCENCE AND NOT PAY MILLIONS OF DOLLARS TO SETTLE…MONEY TALKS IN AMERICA….EXHIBIT A1) OJ SIMPSON…A2) DONTE STALLWORTH….MONEY TALKS… because the media said so? ACTUALLY MICHAELS B/F MACULLY STATED HE SLEPT IN MICHAELS BED… They paint him as mysterious and weird, and now they’re making millions off his death …WHAT SICK F*CK HANGS A NEWBORN OFF A BALCONY..GET THE FACT STARIGHT YOU FAT HOSSA…HE WAS A MOLESTOR…HE LOVED LITTLE WEINERS..

  516. how does paying $20 million protect your career? Explain that to me. I mustve missed the class, “Pay alot of money when your in trouble to prove your innocent.” It makes you look guilty as hell, you’re just in denial.

  518. I HEAR THE JACKSONS ARE GOING TO HELP PAY OFF MICAHELS DEBT…BY MAKING A COMPANY IN HIS NAME….”TINY WEENIES” JUST LIKE THE ONES MICHAEL LIKED…

  520. OHHHHH, that explains alot about B***H Lisa, no wonder she’s so touchy about the jokes!!!

  521. Hey Funny Man … you should be on Comedy Central, but you won’t make the grade … look at the video carefully .. the glass is either half full or half empty .. he was lifting the baby’s feet from getting caught … wouldn’t you do the same if it was your child …. oh yes, I came here because of the dream I had and curious to see the nit wits who would joke at this time. You missed the whole point when he had his say, so get your mind out of the gutter. Sleeping with children is OK, if your mind is OK. If you’re a perv, then it’s not … you get it now?

  524. True story, (U.K. time). Heard “the news” just before I went to bed. Middle of the night my wife woke me up with a cat related problem. I told her MJ had died but she said I was dreaming. In the morning she woke up and said she’d dreamed that MJ had died. Then she wouldn’t believe it was true.

  525. THIS JUST IN: Michael Jackson asked for his ashes to but put inside an Etch-a-Sketch so that little boys will play with him for all eternity…

    and in response to Lisa Jones, if your idea of heaven includes child molesting freaks, then have fun, i’ll pass…

  527. WHERE THE F*** ARE YOU FROM LADY!!?!?! SLEEPING WITH CHILDREN THAT AREN’T YOURS IS NEVER OK!!!! WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU??? I PITY YOUR CHILDREN!!! I WOULDNT “DO THE sAME” FOR MY CHILD, CAUSE I WOULD NEVER PUT A NEWBORN THAT CLOSE TO A F****N BALCONY!!!!! YOU’RE PROBABLY THE BIGGEST MORON ON THE INTERNET RIGHT NOW.

  529. if i was my kid i would dandle it over on the tenth floor of my hotel room just like you r boy michael…why cheer for a child f*cker…lady your a sick puppy….ITS NOT OK…for a 50 year old…single man…to sleep with neighbor kids…etc….mr. jackson was a couple bricks short of a ton.

  531. WHERE THE F*** ARE YOU FROM LADY!!?!?! SLEEPING WITH CHILDREN THAT AREN’T YOURS IS NEVER OK!!!! WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU??? I PITY YOUR CHILDREN!!! I WOULDNT “DO THE sAME” FOR MY CHILD, CAUSE I WOULD NEVER PUT A NEWBORN THAT CLOSE TO A F****N BALCONY!!!!! YOU’RE PROBABLY THE BIGGEST MORON ON THE INTERNET RIGHT NOW. AGREE….

  533. SCENARIO MISS LISA……A new neighbor moves next door….a single 50 year old man….and was acquited of child molestation charges…i take it you would pack up your kids clothes and pj and let them spend the night over there?

  535. SCENARIO MISS LISA……A new neighbor moves next door….a single 50 year old man….and was acquited of child molestation charges…i take it you would pack up your kids clothes and pj and let them spend the night over there? no man in his right state of mind would sleep with his neighbors kids….your boy michael did sleep with the neighbors kids…

  537. a couple of months ago michael touched me in places no kid should be touched he touched my spintor and rectum i think his nose is still in there and it is not comfortable so could one of michaels brothers come and get it out

  538. Marshall & Funny Man, there are no child molesters in Heaven, only on earth. So how did MJ get there? HE WASN’T ONE. Not many people have an impact on the rest who are left here, unless they have a one-way ticket to Heaven … Princess Diana, JFK, MLK, MJ and the list goes on. To cry when they leave or when they are in your presence is a spiritual thing!!! I hope your molesters are there when you kick the bucket, and those you molested too!!

  539. 🙁 come bak to life ppppppppppppllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz wwwwwwwwweeeeeeeeeeeeee allll want u bak :(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(

  540. ding dong michaels gone…happy 26th too the world…michaels jacksons..gone…now the children are free….today is 26th…so lets drink our beer and show our breats…celebrate the molestors gone..

  547. Funny man – get your head out of the gutter you psycho perv!!! The words “to sleep with” does not always mean to have relations with, you SOB!!! It can mean reading bedtime stories and honestly just sleeping in the same bed as you will do with a parent, with someone who can be trusted. Now I know why I had that dream on the sofa and was sent here!

  551. I know he’s there because I’ve had out of body experiences. A response to his death like this and in his life meant he’s on his way there now, as we blog.

  552. Michael wasn’t a child molestor you say, yet he had to pay out close to 20 mil in settlements, i really dont think his name deserves to be uttered in the same sentence as true revolutionaries such as MLK, JFK so on and so forth and you yourself and an idiot for comparing that sick fuck to them…. Yes his music and entertainment aspects of life mayve had a positive impact on the world, but he was no better than the pedophile who kidnaps kids off school yards and his music videos are blinding naive people like you to that fact…

  554. Mr. Funny Man, stop changing your name … it’s like your talking to yourself!

  558. lmao at the satan post, and you need to put down the peyote lisa jones, you happened to have had an out of body experience within the last 24 hours and seen michael jackson in heaven, yeah okay…. i’m with funnyman i’m sure you would’ve encouraged your own children to spoon with MJ

  561. You remind me of some of my psycho patients … always looking to bring someone down, thinking you’ll look good!

  563. The dream was a dream you nut! The out of body experience was years ago, that’s what I know about the other side … GO READ A BOOK!

  564. Police are investigating Michael Jacksons death, they’re sure the sunlight, the moonlight and the good times are not involved, so they’re blaming it on the boogie

  567. lady your contradicting your self…you had a dream yesterday that michael was flying with all the children to heaven…then you change your story that it was years ago….make up your f’ing mind and stick to one story…

  568. LOL, OK LISA MUST BE JOKING. NOBODY CAN BE SERIOUS WITH SOME OF THE SHIT SHE SAYS. GOOD ONE LISA, I LIKE HOW YOU LISTED MJ WITH MLK AND JFK!!!! ROFLMAO

  570. yu are guys are AWFUL. how DARE yu disrespect the DEAD! its AWFUL!! i cnt stress it enuff. None of yu knew MichaeL personaLLy sooo NO ONE KNOWS what he did. MichaeL is a LEGEND, AN ICONIC FIGURE, THE KING OF POP! if yu dnt have anything good to say, dont say anything at aLL. i pray God has MERCY on yur souLs. yu let THAT marinate!!!

  573. NO, LISA IS JOKING. NOBODY CAN BE SERIOUS ABOUT SOME OF THE CRAP SHES SAYING, IM IN DISBELIEF WITH HER. PRETTY GOOD JOKE LISA, LISTING MJ WITH MLK AND JFK! ROFLMAO

  574. MICHAEL WAS THE KING OF TINY WEENIES…A PSYCHO…A MOLESTOR…it take it’s not ok to make fun of hitler and a lot of lifes dead f*ck ups?

  575. Mr Funny Man, did you take your meds today? I’m off this site so you can exchange banter with the other mindless bashers who have no life and nothing better to do. Enjoy your pathetic stupid jokes with each other … and be prepared for the midnight hour when the thriller movie will be playing in your bedroom ….. HA HA HA HA HA!!!!
    HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!

  576. HEY LISA, IF YOU THINK HES IN HEAVEN AND NOT IN HELL, HOW ABOUT YOU KILL YOURSELF AND GO CHECK. REPORT BACK IN ONCE YOU FIND OUT!

  578. FunnyNameHere says:
    June 26, 2009 at 7:50 pm

    HEY LISA, IF YOU THINK HES IN HEAVEN AND NOT IN HELL, HOW ABOUT YOU KILL YOURSELF AND GO CHECK. REPORT BACK IN ONCE YOU FIND OUT! LMAO

  579. ILOVEMICHAEL says:
    June 26, 2009 at 7:47 pm
    yu are guys are AWFUL. how DARE yu disrespect the DEAD! its AWFUL!! i cnt stress it enuff. None of yu knew MichaeL personaLLy sooo NO ONE KNOWS what he did. MichaeL is a LEGEND, AN ICONIC FIGURE, THE KING OF POP! if yu dnt have anything good to say, dont say anything at aLL. i pray God has MERCY on yur souLs. yu let THAT marinate!!!
    UMMM, OK, MARINATING. UMMMM I DONT BELIEVE IN GOD! HOWS THAT?

  585. lol, what a good christian you are J. mike Boyd, if that IS your real name!?! haha. isnt that against your religion to wish people to hell??? arent you being a hypocrite?

  588. he;s in denial…like lisa that your boy michael is melting in the hot flames of hell….like a GI JOE under a magnifying glass on a hot summer day…

  589. as “AWFUL” yu guys think Michael is, you’ve managed to spend yur time taLking bout my MICHAEL!!!!!! hahahahaha. soooo again i say dnt disrespect the DEAD. hitLer CLEARLY cared nuthing about ANYONE. how can yu compare MJ to him?? when the WORLD mourns over a loss (MICHAEL JACKSON) && they rejoice over another (HITLER) something has to be different btw the 2. sooo go to sLeep yu dumb ass!!!!!!!!!!!!! both of yaLL. dem jokes are LAME, yu are LAME && yu shud be HONORED to have lived with such an ICON in the era. aLL yu have on him is 1thing wrong (which isnt true), bt yu know, NO HUMAN BEING is BIGGER than MICHAELJACKSON or WILL BE!!

  590. i seriously cant believe that people would say they support mj, then come onto a joke site about him. im telling you, theyre lying to themselves

  591. bigger as in wieght? cause im sure all that plastic is heavy!!?!?! and yes, im talking about mj, cause its F*****G HILARIOUS!

  592. && how can yu say yu dnt beLieve in God but yu beLieve in heLL && satan?? Lucipher was an angeL in heaven with God. he rebeLed against God && was sent down to heLL by God. soooooooo reaLLY MARINATE on thT!

  593. michael did nothing…..MLK, princess diana, mother thresea,etc…did stuff for the world…all michael did was sing songs…bang kids…he shouldn’t be remembered like he is…

  594. SO YOU DONT THINK MJ MOLESTED CHILDREN? I BET YOU ALSO BELIEVE OBAMA WILL BRING YOU SUGAR DROPS AND CANDY CANES AND A NEW TOYOTA PRIUS!?!?! I BET YOU BELIEVE EVERYTHING THE MEDIA TELLS YOU!!!

  595. The court has considered all argument, and has come to this decision.

    Lisa is living in a fantasy land, likely similar to nevernever land.
    Im sorry miss thang, but your argument is getting more and more pathetic, please leave before making a COMPLETE ass of yourself……..damn, too late.

    We the jury hereby send you to the nevernever land ranch for treatment, its clear you need psychiatric care.
    We are sorry your mother never hugged you, and your father hugged you too much (another nasty kiddy fiddler it would appear).

    All said lisa, its a joke, its all a joke.
    I know you have no self control and will not be able to resist throwing the toys out the cot for my comment, proving how incapable you are of retaining any integrity you have left, which aint much.

    Have a nice day, you silly blubbering little girl

  596. God is the only one that knows if he touch the little boys….on earth…no person would pay off a family 15 million to keep them quite….i would fight to my last dollar to prove my innocence…

  597. NO!!! CLEARLY YU DO… bt im outtie. yu sit here && taLk about MICHAEL.. =]

  598. I DONT BELIEVE IN HELL OR SATAN YOU DUMBA**, WHEN DID I EVER SAY I BELIEVE IN HEAVEN OR HELL??? IF YOU THINK HES IN HEAVEN, WHY DONT YOU KILL YOURSELF AND CHECK! BE SURE TO COME BACK AND LET US KNOW….

  599. why does michael jackson like to shop at the gap? cause kids pants are half off

  601. I know what Lisa is saying to these fags here. She had a dream no doubt MJ directed her here to speak with them. When she talked about an out of body experience she had years ago, that is different from a dream. My mother had one, you can Google it – out of body experiences. Lisa is not contrading herself Mr. Funny Man. This thing is real. Only some people have been to the other side and come back.

  603. an outer body experience? are you serious!?!?! its called acid, then denial that you ever dropped acid…

  604. Fan of MJ says:
    June 26, 2009 at 8:06 pm
    I know what Lisa is saying to these fags here. She had a dream no doubt MJ directed her here to speak with them. When she talked about an out of body experience she had years ago, that is different from a dream. My mother had one, you can Google it – out of body experiences. Lisa is not contrading herself Mr. Funny Man. This thing is real. Only some people have been to the other side and come back.
    THIS HAS TO BE A JOKE TOO, JUST LIKE LISA, YOU MFers ARE FUNNY!

  607. she had a out of body epierence last night..but changed the story to a few years ago..while at woodstock..smoking the reefer…taking scrooms and dropping some lsd..

  609. I did not read it that way. She had a dream today and the out of body or near death experience, as my mom had was years ago. Can you read and understand, you twit?

  610. well im out, have fun with the jokes everyone, i’ll sleep better tonight knowing an acquitted child molestor is DEAD!

  611. hey fan of mj, you can kill youself too and go join mj and all the other out of body experience people. just had to add that b4 i go to bed, late

  616. yes, my dreams will be of mj getting a pineapple shoved up his a** backwards by satan. and also of a world free of a celebrity child molestor who thinks he can get away with anything cause hes famous

  620. it was bottom of the ninth….michaels heart up to bat…and swing and a miss ballgame…michaels heart strikes out…michales life over….heart attack 1…child molestor 0…

  621. did you hear they think its food poisining now, yep he ate 14 year old nuts and a thirteen year old weiner

  628. I heard the Michael Jackson had some much plastic surgery that they were going to melt his body and make Lego blocks so the kids could play with him for a change.

  630. Macdonalds are bringing out the mcjackson burger , 50 year old meat between 10 year old buns .

  631. Now that Michael Jackson is dead they found a new use for his body. Since Michael Jackson is over 99% plastic, he is to be melted down into lego blocks. Maybe now children can finally play with him.

  634. farrah fawcet died and went to heaven. God gave her one wish. She wished all the children in the world would be safe, so god killed micheal jackson. hahahahahaha

  635. the kids all said he had a heart attack cus he just beat it too much hahahahahahahaha

  636. after he died lisa presley asked can i please have my dildo back now? hahahahahahahaha

  639. When MJ woke up in the morning on the day he died, he said he was’nt feeling himself….. It was the little kid from next door

  640. I don’t believe the great king of pop actually slept with inocent young children, it was never proved in a court of law either.

    LONG LIVE MJ. (michael jordan) that is

    Anyway Jackson was awake at all times when he had them in his bed, dirty f***ing kiddy fidler

  641. when farrah fawcett went to heaven god granted her one wish ,, she wished for all the children on earth to be safe ,, so god killed michael jackson

    Q: whats the difference between michael jackson and farrah fawcett ,,?
    A: about 3 hours

  642. Q: what did the man on the beach sayy to michael jackson ?
    A: get out of my sun/son

  644. So MJ is dead! Or is he? Anyone seen the body? I think its all rubbish like is 80s old songs. He’s not dead and no stranger to plastic surgery. Come on jackson sing us a song!!!!

  645. You people who are defending Jackson and calling him a great man and crying in public are the sick ones. He may have been a great performer in the 80’s but he is far from a great man.
    Great people cure diseases and stop wars Jackson was a pedo pure and simple, the man was a child molester. And all those people saying he was the way he was because he didnt have a proper childhood that is no excuse for the things he done, the other Jacksons didnt molest children and behave they way he did and they had the same childhood.

  647. He is dead he was a child molester and you yanks who are outside the hospital and every other building associated with jackson crying and all that are f=cked in the head. He was a stranger so pull yourself together and get a life.

  648. LOL LOL LOL I HATE MICHAEL JACKSON WHAT A PLASTIC CHILD MOLESTER I HOPE HES BURNIN IN HELL 🙂

    whats the difference between sir alex ferguson and michael jackson?
    Sir alex will still be playing giggs in august

    lmao

  649. just because he was aquitted doesn’t mean he wasn’t guilty.It’s amazing what money can buy. in my opinion it is just another peadophile less to worry about.

  650. Q: What was the first thing Michael Jackson did when he got to heaven.

    A: Asked God if he could meet his son.

  651. i agree with Hee Hee if u dont wont to be defended by michael jackson jokes u should serch for them

  653. McDanalds made a burger in memory of Michale Jackson, a 50 year old peice of meat between two 8 year old buns

  655. 1.in heaven, just when baby p thought he was safe! 🙂

    2.as Michael jackson is 80% plasctic wene he dies he will b melted into a lego brick so that little kids can still play with him 🙂

  656. what the diffence between alex fugeson and micheal jackson ?

    alex fuegson will be playing giggs in august

  657. Did you hear what they were going to do with Michael Jackson’s body?

    Since he is made out of 95% of plastic, they’re going to melt him into legos so all the kids can play with him.

  658. Micheal Jacksons girlfriend is devestated about his sudden death. She only just got over her perents leaving her in portugal

  661. Farrah Fosset died and her last wish was for all the kids to be safe so they killed michael jackson

  662. I find all these people getting indignant about the jokes funnier than the jokes…..
    Yes obviously he was awesome talent… (well at least in Off the wall and Thriller the rest was pretty forgettable… I even saw him in the Thriller concert back in the day) But…..
    Hitler was an awesome economist in the 1930s…
    OJ was a good quarter back…
    When the abuse charges came out I thought “he’s just an easy target” then I realised he’s an easy target because he’s a drug addict who sleeps with children…. hummmmmm maybe like Hitler he is just a misunderstood genus lol….

  664. Sami says:
    June 26, 2009 at 8:41 am
    This is horrible, you’re all horrible, just let him rest in peace for gods sake!

    Some how I really doubt he’s gonna be resting in peace ….
    Unless his God is Allah …. in which case he might just get 20 virgins to play with in Heaven
    Although I’m not sure whether dying of a drugs overdose counts for becoming martyr

    Anyway Michael I’m glad you wanted to be in my gang!!

  665. J.C. Penny is planning a Michael Jackson Memorial Sale. Just like Michael, they too will have little boy’s pants & underwear half off.

  666. Q: What’s brown and often found in a baby’s diaper?
    A: Michael Jackson’s hand.

    Now should be…
    what is attracting flies, starting to smell, brown and sometimes found in baby’s diapers?
    Michael Jackson’s hand.
    Lol

  670. Michael Jackson’s death was definately assisted suicide. Michael Jackson knew that he wasn’t up to the comeback tour.

    He knew that if he had gone through with it he would have been always remembered as the star who was charged with molestation, who was well past his best, or worse.

    Suicide, assisted by his doctor, resulting in his death gave him a degree of pardon for his past and he will be remembered as a genius. And it means his children will become rich from his royalties and they will not have to live with the stigma that would have always been attached to them.

    The doctor’s claims about trying and wanting to revive him was well rehearsed.

    A not surprising end to his life..!

  672. Michael Jackson was a great singer. I think you lot take the mick out of him should be dead not him R.I.P Michael.

  673. People who joke about death deserving nothing less imagine if that was YOUR father, YOUR brother, YOUR son, or YOUR best friend. NOBODY knows whether he actually did sexually abuse anyone. I don’t think he did, but thats my opinon + im sure other people have others but it’s quite revolting that sick people are making jokes about his death espicially when he was aquited of these charges if you remember.
    Michael Jackson + all the jackson family members had a very tough and rough upbringing due to their father. Ever wondered why he changed his looks? why he did the things he did. How about do some research before you make jokes about something you know nothing about.

  674. shortly before dying, micheal jackson tripped over a babys pram..

    his family posted a comment on his grave saying ‘dont blame it on the buggy’

  676. 1.Michael Jacksons parents iformed the doctor that they did not want him to be buryed, only so that he could be made into lego pieces so the little children could play with him!

    2.Whats MJ’s favourate shop? Toys ‘r us.

    3.Michael J woke up at 2.44AM and noticed that his face was melting off, All fight against global warming, Dont Burn plastic!!

  677. One question: Do you guys hate MJ that much or do you actually think these lame ass jokes are funny?!?
    What goes around comes around in another shape and form so dont be to pissed off when your on the other end of this, and some c**t starts dancing on your grave.

  679. Idiots, you Google MJ jokes and get here. What do you expect? Last week you wouldve been LOLing. Hypocrites

  680. Q- What did M J tell the paramedics who arrived at his home?

    A – Take me to the “Childrens Hospital” immediately!!

  681. What do Michael Jackson and a silver medalist have in common? They both came in a little behind.

  682. i think all of you are so sick to joke about michales death think of his poor family. i think you all need to get a life

  684. someone tells you your next door neighbour is a peto and ud ban your children from going anywhere near his house, just because SOMEONE said it. michael jackson went to court, case after case, and because he made a few good songs its all good. he was a waste of space and a messed up freak. all you havta do is look at his face to no that. all you “MJ FANS” your the real disgusting ones. supporting someone who raped children and got let off the charges because his RICH! his nothing special, a disabled child could sing his songs, rot in hell you dirty old bastard.

  686. My favourite: How is Michael Jackson and sardines the same? They both come in little cans.

  687. Micheal Jackson may be RAPIST But think of the g@ys, lezzies, trannies and people who swing both ways just let him f**king rest in peace think of his family and think of micheal jackason number 2 RIP MICHEAL

    what the f**k what am i talking about micheal jackson in a good way for hes a f**king dirty rotting basterd and he should stay that way

    But EVERYONE deserves A LITTLE bit of respect Even Wako Jako His songs amzing his future live in hell but really RIP Wako Jako

  688. i rekon some ov these jokes r funny like but as someone sed up the page its sick like wa if it was 1 ov ur family who did like it really aint tha funny just let him rest in peace.

  689. Michael Jackson was found dead 2 days ago at UCLA Medical Hospital. He was in the nursery. Apparently, 8 year olds have learned to fight back.

  690. It’s definately true about them saying “If you get offended by these jokes then why are you at this site.” You obviously google searched these jokes just like the rest of us did, so aren’t you the sick one? Anyway, the jokes are great, keep them coming.

  691. Q. What’s the difference between Farrah Fawcet and Michael Jackson?

    A. Farrah like to play with Majors Michael liked to play with Minors

  692. I find it funny that “NOTE: Inappropriate commments will be removed. Please be courteous to others.” is listed right above this box.

    Anyway, did you hear that Michael Jackson died of food poisoning.

    He ate a bunch of six year-old weiners….

  693. the way i see it, it all went wrong when he turned white :L
    just wierd changing your physical features, you should stay the way you was born, no matter what, unless its a life saving operation 🙂

  694. Why wasn’t Micheal Jackson allowed to go to heaven??

    Because god was pissed that he messed up his paint job lmao lmao

  696. Q: What do raw oysters and Michael Jackson have in common?
    A: They both come on little crackers.

  697. j. whats the diffarence same between an xbox and mj ?

    A.kids turn them both on !!!!!!!!!

  701. well i do agree thtat its not nice 2 take the mick cause it would be upsettin if he was part of ur family or a friend
    but he did mess wiv kids he should be in jail
    and its only 4 a laugh and peeps who say that mj joke makers should be dead are wrong because no one deserves 2 die

  702. Q: What are Michael Jackson, Farrah and Ed MacMahon expecting for Christmas?

    A: Patrick Swayze.

  703. BTW i love chantelle edwards shes cool and funni so so funni her number is 07992854937

  704. Guys, who searched this and commented saying that it’s not nice and people who laugh are sick that sorta comment all i gotta say is if you dont wanna read it dont search it!! 🙂

  706. this is discusting and how can you say he messed with kids he was proven innocent the familys saw a rich man and took advantage of it just to get money.

  708. I never said he messed with kids it was AJOKE I said he played with minors how you take that is up to you but it was A JOKE

  709. I wasn’t havin ago miss sensitive and the fact your on ajokes page might give it away

  710. The LA county coroners office found that Michael Jackson died of food poisoning. He ate some 12 year old nuts.

  712. Q. whats the difference between Michael Jackson and Alex ferguson?
    A. Fergie will still be playing Gigs at the end of the year

  715. You know since he is dead because he is made of 99% plastic there goin to melt him do into lego so little kids can play with him

  717. What is the difference beteen michael jackson and sir alex furgueson?

    sir alex will be playing giggs in august

  718. mcdonalds have brought out a michael jackson memorial burger its got 50 year old meat inbetween 2 ten year old buns

  719. Thats wrong i dont care what Michael Jackon did hes still a human being and now he is gone Michael Jackson was a great singer and a talented dancer and i donnt think if he was still here he would appreciate yall making stupid and innsensitive jokes about him!!!! when you die do yall want people to be talking about yall i dont think so so dont talk about him ok!!! and yall obviously dont have a life if yall sit here coming up with jokes all day long to post on this website so i suggest you go out and find u one ok!!!!!!!!! or et some feelings

  720. i think they are funny but still wrong he may be dead but he still dont dersiver this you people should be asamned of your selves

  723. who ever wrote these jokes you make me sick you are horrible and dont disever to be alive i was never a big fan of michael jackson but i know he dont disever this and i think some one should make jokes about the people who wrote this when they are dead so dont say things like that you sick people

  724. What does Michael Jackson and a Bigmac have in common?

    ‘There both 30 year old meat between 10 year old buns!’

  726. How many Michael Jackson’s does it take to screw a lightbulb?

    ‘None. Michael jackson only screws 12 year old boys!’

  727. Ah lighten up people were makin jokes of him before he even died and if you don’t laugh you cry and I liked Michaels music still do he was a genius and if people make jokes about me when I die at least it shows I been remember and if you don’t like why did you come on Michael Jackson joke page

  730. *when farrah died she asked the lord to please protect the little children.
    **when the lord herd her prayer, he decided to respond….
    ***this just in michael jackson is dead at the age of 50***
    ~consider the children protected~

  732. You don’t half contradict yourself you should be ashamed of yourself for finding it funny and for even looking

  733. They can make all the jokes they want about that freak. What’s wrong with you people that feel bad for this guy? Have you not heard enough of his personal life to draw a fair enough conclusion that besides being a freak, he was a drug addicted pervert. My religion (Catholic) tells me I should pray for his soul, to which I will, however, my religion also says the sinner must repent and I doubt he much believed . Nobody should feel sorry for Michael Jackson.

  734. Kelly…..Its called a ‘joke’

    meaning nothing by it.
    Dont take these like its not a joke.
    Damn…..Grow up.

  735. Q: Is it true Michael Jackson died of food poisoning?
    A: Yes, he got hold of some 12-year-old meat

    Today the Boy Scouts announced that, to honor, Michael Jackson, every Boy Scout in the world will have their zippers at half-staff.

  737. I can also make jokes and feel bad That 50 year old has died and has left three children without a Father

  740. I was talking to someone else miss butt inn I was saying the same thing 2 sum one else get facts right first

    Michael Jackson died while falling over a childrens pram but don’t blame it on the boogie

  741. I think these jokes are extremely dissresspectful- even though i am only a 11 year old child. You put your self in his shoes, how would you feel? (dead)

    P.S I love the jokes here is one for you. Michael Jackson didn’t like being black. What did the people say? Dont blame it on the sunshine

  742. NEWSFLASH; jacko to be cremated and sprinkled into curry, so kids can feel him go through there arse one more time.

  743. Oi how is it being disrespectful? ( Coming from a big fan of Michael Jackson_)
    I bet if i was famous, i would get ripped the piss out of!
    Look at jade goody….& the jokes about her.
    They make jokes up for everybody; & just remeber a joke is a joke & nothing is meant truthly.

    Why get soo worked up about it?
    Just enjoy the jokes XD

  744. If I could have a billion dolars in life, people could poke as much fun as they like at me after I die: I’d object to any accusations of kiddyfiddling though, period. On this note, although proved innocent, anyone taking as much interest in boy children as MJ did is bound to have dubious questions asked about them and a ‘BAD’ reputation will always stay.

  746. URGENT RSPCA : Announcement….. wanted–goog home for abandoned monkey …..very friendly…..likes being wanked off with a white glove!!!!

  747. Rumor has it that Michael Jackson is in Switzerland undergoing cosmetic surgery on his pecker.
    Then the description the California Justice Dept got from the little boy won’t fit anymore.
    Another rumor has it that he’s finally going all the way and changing gender entirely.

  748. whats the hardest stain to get out of a little boys underpants? Michael jacksons make up

  749. MJ was always destined to entertain and it’s ironic that, he was/is so prolific he continues this role even after his passing….in the form of these jokes!

  752. yall are really rude…sure, nothing wrong with reading some jokes, but to say your glad he’s dead? thats f*cked up.. it was never proven that he did or didnt do things with little kids, really actually quite f*cked up someone would say those things about someone who made such an impact on the musical industry, inspired most of the people you yourselves worship in music today! People are so quick to put down and make petty jokes on something they’re unsure of, and forget about his HUGE possitive impact on the WORLD. I mean think about what if he really DIDNT do anything, imagine your life being torn apart for wanting to be a kid again, and people misunderstanding it a pedophile-ism. lol really sad i think…to even be insulted in death. not remembered for his accomplishments but rather his accusations(accusations made to gain money)

  753. i stronly disagree with your comment calista chill out people having a laugh and what they think dont effect you or MJ! the bloke admitted to showering with boys on live television!!! i do agree that people saying hes dead is a bit harsh but its only do-gooders like you that read these blogs and have got a problem with it. like you said ” it was never proven that he did or didnt do things with little kids” so after this you go on to say “(accusations made to gain money) which you state as a fact after earlier saying it wasnt proven! have you ever heard of freedom of speach it means that these people can say there happy hes dead without you sticking your nose in because you like the man’s music! notice i dont comment on my feelings for jacko at all!

  757. your sick B*****ds they ant even funny right your lot need to leave him alone yeah whats he ever done to you?

  758. Michaels Yacht is up for auction, Gary Glitter the well known english pedo has put in a bid for all the buoys!Calista? do yourself a favour pal and get a reality check. no good sitting up there on your high horse looking at all the rest of us down here, it won’t work.All the talking heads and all the so called experts who will come crawling out from underneath their various stones, will neither save or do anything to further tarnish MJ’s reputation.He did that himself, by becoming Wacko, and the other planned alter egos, that manifested themselves over the last 45 years.You really think that until his world came crashing down, to the tune of $20 million dollars, that he was not entirely aware of what he was doing? As for erecting statues of himself, well….Saddam, Stalin, and Adolph all did that before Mikey, and look what happened to them!! get a cola, a smile, and you have a lovely day now!

  759. after his funeral micheal jackson wants his ashes to be put into an etchasketch, so all the kids can still play with him . lol

  760. R.I.P to michael jackson loved his music funny jokes tho lol

    dont knw y people get upset of these jokes u probs didnt knw him

  763. It was never proven that OJ killed Nicole either, but everyone still thinks he did. Why is it different for Michael? Was it because he was a musician?

  764. Thats not very nice some people actually like Michael just casue he’s dead dosn’t mean to say you can make fun about him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    🙁 ;(

  765. since Michael has passed away, the family thought it would be best seeing that michael is about 90% plastic, to melt him down and turn him into legos so little boys can play with him for a change!

  766. I would be lying if I didn’t say that I have always enjoyed MJ’s music and feel that his death is a tagedy. I would also state that IF all the stories about his personal life are true – he will need to respond to a higher authority. Here is the real story that ALL you people are missing – there are 3 sick disgusting law firms that are now entering into a custody battle for the opportunity to get the residual earnings from MJ’s fame. None of them give a hoot about these children who haven’t even had time to mourn the LOSS of their FATHER; they are only concerned with getting a share of the millions that will be made from the world’s loss. This is the true crime. Moreover, who was MJ’s financial advisor? This person needs to lose his license to practice. Michael, you will be missed, however in the last segment of your personal home videos you stated that your children meant the world to you – if you did not execute the appropriate legal documents while you were in and out of surgery, you have demonstrated to the world that you were a fraud. Dear Reader, if you are a single parent who truely cares about their children, please find an attorney and make sure your children are cared for if you ever end up DEAD.

  767. those jocks aren’t funny! they’re sick! how can anybody even laugh at these! there was only 1 sue for molestation from MJ to a kid, and he was even found guilty! but once they got the money, they just acted as though it never happened! and people call him gay just because he revolutionized pop and dancing. you try singing and like like him and tell me how you do it. everybody is just jealous of him!

  768. Can guarantee the only people offended by these jokes are black, and they’re only offended because Jackson was once black, a long time ago. if he was white, none of them would say a thing. Michael Jackson was a perverted scumbag, and I am glad he is dead–I only wished he died in a more bloody manner, like most black people seem to.

    Ooohh, don’t be hatin’, y’all! Go back to your crack pipes, you ghetto trash.

  769. Michael Jackson dead at 50, while reports are coming in he was taking every drug the pharmacy made, there are rumors surfacing that he died from food poisoning. Having read on the internet that consuming out of date old food was the fountain of youth, it’s believed Michael ate one too many 9 year old wieners…

  770. McDonnell’s is coming out with the mcJackson burger 50 year old meat between 10 year old buns. bahhaa. i think its great.if your gonna hate then you can su*k it

  772. here’s a good 1:

    Due to the fact that Michael Jackson is 90% plastic, he will be melted down so little boys can play with him for a change

  774. * * Now that Michael is dead plans for funeral have been approved.
    Since he was mostly made up from plastic, it has beent agreed that he will be
    melted down and formed into lego blocks. Then the legos will be given to children so that for a change little kids can play with Michael, instead of him playing with them. * * *

  775. It was said that Michael used to spank his monkey a lot and now the poor monkey has to spank himself…. ha.

  776. We shouldn’t really laugh at Michael Jackson – just because he’ll have to be buried in a ‘Y’-shaped coffin – doesn’t mean we should make fun of him.

  777. Due to sheer plastic surgery michael jacksons death wish is that instead of him being cremated he will be recycled instead

  778. I think, um that it’s really um sad that my brother um micheal haz um died, because he err made such an important impact err on the world. I think um we should all get along and err ride ponies into the umm sunset, and not make jokes umm about my family.

  779. these r really not funny i dont care if i didnt know him i know some of his family and i cant be leave ppl can make fun of him he is died and u guys think this is funny its really not at all that is f***ed up

  780. Hey guys I wrote another one myself:
    “Michael Jackson is only pretending to be dead, after his funeral ceremony he will be put into a plastic figures museum where he will be put on the display.
    And one day when a small kid will be walking past he will grab it and run!”

    So how was that?

  781. guyz that’s wrong to pay michael out just because he is dead. do any of you guyz evam know if he done any of those things to those kids?and so what if he did its his life, yeeeh it may be wrong but if he did do it then he would have been charged or aressted. and how would youh guys like it if youz were payed out if you were dead I don’t think youh would like it.

    yeeeh didn’t think so:(

  782. Some people blame michael jacksons death on the cardiac arrest, but some people blame it on sunshine! blame it on moonlight… :L

  783. Whats the difference between michael jackson and sir alex furgason?
    Sir alex will be playing gigs this augustt.

  784. why does michael jackson want to be melted down into little toy soulders now he is dead????

    becuase the kids can play with him insted !!!

  787. Dear Readers:

    Mikey J. has arrived; he has returned to his point of origin.

    I am now strapping on my WHITE HOT POKER, cast in the form of
    a young boy (his favourite), in order to give him a laurel and hardy
    handshake, not to mention a severe eternal anal reaming, as his
    welcome home gift.

    Later, we will watch Blazing Saddles and cackle at the golliwogs.

    Be seeing you rabid, supportive fans, too!

    Sincerely, Beelzebub

    P.S. Anxious to see you, B. Obammy. Keeping the poker hot!

  789. don’t think too many kids were as thrilled as mj was. i’m saddened by his death , i would have preferred to see him stoned or hung so we could all watch and eat candy and drink at the fun were having

  790. the jokes are funny but i think some are harsh, hes a music ledgend
    will never be forgotten

  791. his weirdness will outlive his music he will always bee the singing plastic pedo who was good as a kid but then went wacko

  792. You People Are Sick i Thing you people need a life . how can you talk about him like that say it was you Would you like it I dont thing u would .

    I thing you people gotta thing about what you send because them nasty jokes aint funny at all you people are just sick in the head that need to grow up and act Your Age Not Your Shoe Size .

    And I Dont Thing Your Family And Friendz Would Like it if Some One Did a Nasty Joks About you .

    So I Guess You People Should Thing Twice Befor putting them on and joking about them .

  793. Hahaha I remember hearing these before he was dead…who cares! He was nothing but a low life creep!

  794. for you people who make fun of a great man like MJ get a life i bet most of the ppl who call him a peodo most likely are themselves as he was not found guilty yeah he paid off one child’s parents but if it was you the idol of millions and some year old’s dad said u raped them what would you do

  795. Micheal Jacksons dieing wish was to be buried at sea and the site to be marked by little buoys. LOL

  796. When Farrah Fawcett got to heaven God granted her 1 wish. She wished for all gods childern to be safe. God granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.

  797. Q: What did michael jackson say when he got his heart attack?

    A: Send me to the children’s hospital.

  798. haha how could u not b happy he is ded?? honestly there are white ppl who wanna b black… i reali don c y they would degrade them self tho… but we whites dont want blacks tryna b like us its sooo wrong nd insulting… plus yeh he lives nowhere near me but at least there is 1 less pedo in the world…

  801. what is too be done with Michael Jackson’s body??

    since he’s 99%plastic, MJ’s gonna be melted down into legos so that little boys can play with him for a change.

  802. What do the Australian cricket team and latoya jackson have in common ?

    They’ll both be taking the ashes home this summer.

  803. whats the difference between alex ferguson and michael jackson ? michael wont be playing gigs next year

  804. i hate these jokes guys i’m not even dead i’m just hibernating for the rest of my life…

  805. Micheal Jacksons Body is going to be thrown in the river soo…..

    he can be strapped top the boy!

  806. Latest news reports that MJ did not die of Heart Attack. It was confirmed that MJ died of “Food Poisoning”. Apparently he had just eaten some 12 year old nuts.

    BA Ha Ha

  808. what does michael jackson and a computer have in commen?

    they both get turned on by kids

  809. apparently there going to cremate micheal jackson and put his ashes in a etcher sketcher so kids can still play with him 😛

  810. Michael Jackson’s remains are to be burried In Pennsylvania.

    They are to be placed in the town of DuBois

  812. farrah fawcett arrived in heaven & was granted one wish.she says keep all the children of the world safe.five hours later michael jackson arrives

  814. Michael jacksons ashes are going to be put in to an ech-a-skech so kids can still play with his Knob

  815. WHEN THE EMT GUYS WENT TO MICHAEL JACKSONS HOUSE THERE WERE TWO LITTLE KIDS SITTING IN A BUCKET OF ICE. THE EMT GUY ASKED HIS BODYGUARD WHY THEY WERE THERE AND HE SAID MICHAEL ALWAYS LIKED A FEW COLD ONES IN THE AFTERNOON!

  816. Dont blame it on the sunshine
    Dont blame it on the Moonlight
    Dont blame it on the goodtimes
    Blame it on the cardiac arrest
    :L

  817. What does Michael Jackson and zits have in common?
    Zits wait untill ur 14 to cum on ur face

  818. Michael Jackson didn’t die of a heart attack in the hospital ward. He died in the children’s ward whilst having a stroke.

    Q: What are they going to do with Michael Jackson’s body ?
    A: Melt him down into plastic cups so the little kids can lick his rims

  820. jackson 5 is doing a cover of the spice girls 2 become 1 and calling it 5 becomes 4

  821. Michael Jackson Was Walking Through A Store When He Tripped Over A Buggy. The People Yelled At Him But Michael Said. ” Blame It On The Boogie!”

  823. Q: Did you hear McDonalds is coming out with a hamburger in memory of Michael Jackson?

    A: Yeah, it’s 50 year old meat in between 10 year old buns.

  825. I’m amazed Michael didn’t die from food poisoning since he liked to eat 10 year old wieners.

  826. doctor one said:
    thats it.michael jackson is dead.
    doctor two said:
    indeed.
    scientist said:
    well if my calculations are correct,we can use his body to make lego peices or footballs for kids to play with for a change!

  829. michael Jacksons body has been recycled, most of him is now plastic bags, trouble is he’s still dangerous too young children.