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You are here: Home / Jokes / Golf Jokes / Moses and Jesus Playing Golf

Moses and Jesus Playing Golf

July 23, 2009 by F&J Staff 36 Comments

It was a beautiful, sunny Sunday afternoon while Moses, Jesus, and another guy were out playing golf. On the first tee-box, Moses pulls out his driver and blisters a shot up the right side of the fairway, rolling fast towards a water hazard. Moses quickly raised his club, parting the water while his ball rolls through to the other side safely.

Golf Ball Hole In OneNext up on the tee, Jesus hits a really long drive right towards the very same water hazard. His ball came to rest dead center of the pond, hovering just over the surface of the water. Jesus casually walks out onto the pond, and chips it up onto the green within a couple feet of the flagstick.

Not impressed, the third guy steps up to the tee without taking any time and just randomly whacks at the ball. Rightfully so, the ball is hit with a nasty hook that clears the left OB markers and goes over a fence into oncoming traffic. It bounces off a truck’s windshield hitting a nearby tree, bounces onto the roof of the greenkeeper’s shed, back out onto the fairway and towards the same pond that Moses and Jesus hit. Before it gets wet, the ball ricochets off a small rock and bounces onto a lily pad on over the water when a bullfrog jumped up and ate the ball. Right at that moment, a bald eagle swoops down and grabs the frog, flying away. As it flew over the green, the frog squeals with fright and drops the ball right next to the flagstick, taking one bounce and landing in the cup for an astounding hole in one.

In disgust, Moses then turns to Jesus and says, “I hate playing with your Dad.”

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Filed Under: Golf Jokes, Jokes, Religious Jokes

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Comments

  1. danineteen says

    July 23, 2009 at 9:53 am

    Awesome! I did NOT see that coming! 😀

    Reply
  2. Sam says

    July 24, 2009 at 4:48 am

    dudeeee….awesome!!

    Reply
  3. jerry in TANZANIA E.Africa says

    July 25, 2009 at 6:49 am

    thas is brillianT!!
    soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo cooooooooooooooooooool!

    Reply
  4. jkmagoto says

    July 27, 2009 at 3:03 pm

    oh poor flog, had to be sacrificial fog

    Reply
  5. Sniff says

    July 30, 2009 at 5:15 pm

    ya repeated water in last paragraph, and its spelled “disgust” at the end, funny joke tho 🙂

    Reply
  6. kayla says

    July 30, 2009 at 10:20 pm

    Didn’t see that commin. Great joke!

    Reply
  7. F&J Staff says

    August 4, 2009 at 10:37 am

    Got it Sniff, thanks 🙂

    Reply
  8. ruben220276 says

    August 14, 2009 at 12:47 am

    Read before, never tired of it. excellent

    Reply
  9. Oluwa says

    August 25, 2009 at 3:35 am

    Repeater!!

    Reply
  10. LefaB says

    September 3, 2009 at 8:32 am

    Oh nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, man

    Reply
  11. sammii_x25 says

    September 8, 2009 at 4:19 pm

    😉 Good one!

    Reply
  12. rimodoni says

    September 10, 2009 at 6:11 am

    The three poor fellows, they didn’t include me, I’m Jesus’s GRANDFATHER!

    Reply
  13. Texas Gal says

    September 14, 2009 at 9:36 am

    That was so funny. I did not see that coming. Loved it.

    Reply
  14. Itachi Uchiha says

    September 25, 2009 at 10:17 pm

    Lol nice one, I didn’t see it coming

    Reply
  15. swofrah says

    October 8, 2009 at 4:22 am

    didnt see it coming

    Reply
  16. swofrah says

    October 8, 2009 at 4:23 am

    wooo

    Reply
  17. D.B. Cooper says

    October 8, 2009 at 5:19 pm

    Nice one. Really loved it.

    Reply
  18. OMG! says

    October 12, 2009 at 8:40 am

    wow. didnt see that coming. thought it was just some random guy

    Reply
  19. deniceguy says

    October 12, 2009 at 9:42 am

    PERFECT!DATZ A GOOD ONE

    Reply
  20. Mulz says

    October 20, 2009 at 9:51 am

    Hey, I love being in any game the Jesus’ Dad plays, cause I know He’s always on my side.

    Reply
  21. Michael says

    October 23, 2009 at 8:21 pm

    Hee hee hee hee! nice one!

    Reply
  22. KING AB says

    October 29, 2009 at 3:43 am

    lolo lolo thas of the hook, i lv it.GODBLESS

    Reply
  23. Anton says

    November 12, 2009 at 12:15 am

    LOL! Now that one was really funny! :)))

    Reply
  24. cathrine says

    November 16, 2009 at 7:44 am

    that’s nice one. very funny

    Reply
  25. Bobby says

    December 2, 2009 at 5:52 am

    Dat was cool,really enjoyed it

    Reply
  26. Marty F says

    March 3, 2010 at 10:30 am

    Loved it. Only Tiger could have topped that shot..lol…

    Reply
  27. kevin says

    May 12, 2010 at 7:42 am

    Lol that was awesome keep up the good work.

    Reply
  28. knowing says

    May 12, 2010 at 7:44 am

    that wasnt very funny

    Reply
  29. Nalo says

    May 31, 2010 at 6:45 pm

    That was funny!

    Reply
  30. chika says

    June 15, 2010 at 5:35 am

    uh la sweet !

    Reply
  31. tingly says

    July 16, 2010 at 10:15 am

    that was so funnie

    Reply
  32. celes55 says

    July 31, 2010 at 12:49 am

    wow caught me at the end didn’t you!

    Reply
  33. AZACHARYSAMMY says

    September 9, 2010 at 2:38 pm

    all the time reading i was trying to figure out the punch line,WOW I GOT PUNCHED INSTEAD, nice.

    Reply
  34. oladdon says

    August 31, 2011 at 5:20 pm

    Dats a impressive n outstandin joke

    Reply
  35. michelle says

    March 20, 2013 at 12:12 am

    I don’t get the moral of the joke please explain

    Reply
  36. Leo Laney says

    September 22, 2017 at 11:43 pm

    I remembered the set up but not the joke thanks to numerous small strokes. I googled the setup and the joke was one of the answers. Thank you. and thank google too

    Reply

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