Just imagine sitting in traffic on your way to work and hearing this. Many Sydney folks did hear this on the FOX FM morning show in Sydney. The DJs play a game where they award winners great prizes. The game is called “Mate Match“.
The DJs call someone at work and ask if they are married or seriously involved with someone. If the contestant answers “yes”, he or she is then asked 3 random yet highly personal questions. The person is also asked to divulge the name of their partner with phone number for verification. If their partner answers those same three questions correctly, they both win the prize.
One particular game, however, several months ago made the Harbour City drop to its knees with laughter and is possibly the funniest thing you’ve heard yet. Anyway, here’s how it all went down:
DJ: “Hey! This is Ed on FOX-FM. Have you ever heard of ‘Mate Match’?”
Contestant: (laughing) “Yes, I have.”
DJ: “Great! Then you know we’re giving away a trip to the Gold Coast if you win. What is your name? First only please.”
Contestant: “Brian.”
DJ: “Brian, are you married or what?”
Brian: (laughing nervously) “Yes, I am married.”
DJ: “Thank you. Now, what is your wife’s name? First only please.”
Brian: “Sara.”
DJ: “Is Sara at work, Brian?”
Brian: “She is gonna kill me.”
DJ: “Stay with me here, Brian! Is she at work?”
Brian: (laughing) “Yes, she’s at work.”
DJ: “Okay, first question – when was the last time you had sex?”
Brian: “About 8 o’clock this morning.”
DJ: “Atta boy, Brian.”
Brian: (laughing sheepishly) “Well…”
DJ: “Question #2 – How long did it last?”
Brian: “About 10 minutes.”
DJ: “Wow! You really want that trip, huh? No one would ever have said that if a trip wasn’t at stake.”
Brian: “Yeah, that trip sure would be nice.”
DJ: “Okay. Final question. Where did you have sex at 8 o’clock
this morning?
Brian: (laughing hard) “I, ummm, I, well…”
DJ: “This sounds good, Brian. Where was it at?”
Brian: “Not that it was all that great, but her mum is staying with us for a couple of weeks…”
DJ: “Uh huh…”
Brian: “…and the Mother-In-Law was in the shower at the time.”
DJ: “Atta boy, Brian.”
Brian: “On the kitchen table.”
DJ: “Not that great?? That is more adventure than the previous hundred times I’ve done it. Okay folks, I will put Brian on hold, get this wife’s work number and call her up. You listen to this.”
[3 minutes of commercials follow.]
DJ: “Okay audience; let’s call Sarah, shall we?” (Touch tones…..ringing….)
Clerk: “Kinkos.”
DJ: “Hey, is Sarah around there somewhere?”
Clerk: “This is she.”
DJ: “Sarah, this is Ed with FOX-FM. We are live on the air right now and I’ve been talking with Brian for a couple of hours now.”
Sarah: (laughing) “A couple of hours?”
DJ: “Well, a while now. He is on the line with us. Brian knows not to give any answers away or you’ll lose. Sooooooo… do you know the rules of ‘Mate Match’?”
Sarah: “No.”
DJ: “Good!”
Brian: (laughing)
Sarah: (laughing) “Brian, what the hell are you up to?”
Brian: (laughing) “Just answer his questions honestly, okay? Be completely honest.”
DJ: “Yeah yeah yeah. Sure. Now, I will ask you 3 questions, Sarah. If your answers match Brian’s answers, then the both of you will be off to the Gold Coast for 5 days on us.”
Sarah: (laughing) “Yes.”
DJ: “Alright. When did you last have sex, Sarah?”
Sarah: “Oh God, Brian….uh, this morning before Brian went to work.”
DJ: “What time?”
Sarah: “Around 8 this morning.”
DJ: “Very good. Next question. How long did it last?”
Sarah: “12, 15 minutes maybe.”
DJ: “Hmmmm. That’s close enough. I am sure she is trying to protect his manhood. We’ve got one last question, Sarah. You are one question away from a trip to the Gold Coast. Are you ready?”
Sarah: (laughing) “Yes.”
DJ: “Where did you have it?”
Sarah: “OH MY GOD, BRIAN!! You didn’t tell them that did you?”
Brian: “Just tell him, honey.”
DJ: “What is bothering you so much, Sarah?”
Sarah: “Well…”
DJ: Come on Sarah…..where did you have it?
Sarah: “Up the a$$…”
After a long pause, the DJ said, “Folks, we need to take a station break”
And the drivers of Sydney almost crashed their cars laughing!
i couldnt read it, it was to long
lol..
hahaha that was sooo funny … abit too long tho thanks 4 the laff
THIS ONE IS HILARIOUS! I’M AT WORK WHEN I READ IT, TRYING TO FIGHT BOREDOM, SO THE LENGTH OF THE JOKE WASN’T AN ISSUE. BESIDES THE LONGER THE BETTER. HE HE. ANYWAYS I HAD TO STIFFEL MY LAUGHTER. SO DID THEY WIN THE TRIP?
OMG….THIS WAS SO HILARIOUS
made me laugh ma head off!!! gd1!!!
omg that as f@#$%*! funny
LMFAOO!! THIS WAS THE FUNNIEST JOKE IVE READ ON THIS WEBSITE SO FAR..
the best 1 i ever read
LMFAO….., it’s damn funny joke i ever read…; Well, is it a real happening in sydney?
OK. I’m a bit speechless right now. That was…overwhelming and completely unexpected, but it was pretty effing awesome.
hahhahahahahahahahah! that was so funny! yup nuffin to be embarassd bout, jus few hundred viewers readin in(!) hhahahaha i wonder wat the mother-in-laws shock was??? 😀
great stuff, anyone know where ther might be a copy of the audio instead of the text..
that was the funniest thing eva!!
oh wow! that was hillariouse. thats been the funniest joke i’ve read on this website
HAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!DAMN THATS HILLARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!11
oh wow. that’s hilarious. i fell bad for them. 🙂
funny very funny
omg!!! dat was awesum!
lmfao, that is a good one, i will laugh about it for a few days
how do u get an audio for this?
i really dont think that was very funny
but ok
the fact that it really happened made the joke even better!
LMAO! This is the funniest joke on the website i’ve read
laughing so hard now! hahahahaa
I really would like to know if the did win the prize to gold coast…
Hope they gonna enjoy in gold coast as well… up the @$$ again huh? hahaha
This is so gud and I really enjoyed
The joke was good and marvellous!!!!!!!1
Oh God I can’t stop laughing! ROFLMAO
THIS IS SERIOUSLY FUNNY! One of the BEST i’ve heard so far! HAHAHAH~~!!!! I can only imagine everyone laughing their asses off!
-peace out-
ROFL…. 😀 😀 😀 Holy crap…. This is priceless…….
THIS IS THE FUNNIEST THING I’VE READ ON THIS SITE! BY FAR THE FUNNIEST AND TO THINK THAT IT ACTUALLY HAPPENED. BIG SHOUT OUT TO SARAH, MAY THAT A$$ NEVER LIE!!
It is Good! I really enjoy it alot.
THATS A GOOD ONE FUNNY I MUST SAY…..
got told about this joke mid 1990’s and according to the fella who told me it came from a Sydney radio staion so it may well be true. I was wicket-keeping in a cricket game at the time and laughed so hard I missed the next ball and it went for 4 runs…
I really like this one
i thinkn it was boring
blew my head off man, seriuosly. Good one
it was awesome.it realy cracked me
Hahaha! Seriously funny!
that was f***ing funny XD
Thats more like it!!! Its just wow, did they win?
OMG!!! thats so funny! lmao
this real fricking bad people! Oh my gosh. This is a true story. ha hah hah hahahah
it was worth the reading…lol
lol. that was funny.
where did u have it?
UP THE @$$
By far one of the best jokes ever. Brought tears to my eyes, awesome!
i cant believe she said that…
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! BEST ONE ON THE SITE!!!!
oww , ha ha ha , datz de best , nyc one ,ha ha ha ha
Oh man.. Thats soooooooo long.. Yet it got me…
dats fynny as heck
holly sh*t thats funny,sick AND stupid
o yeah and why was she like this “this is she”
is she like indian or somtin
its called proper english “gio dude”… you might have heard of it somewhere… :-/
hahahahahahahaha!
wow.. that was live on the Radio?!?!
damnnn……….poor DJ…he mustve been stunned…loool
Wow that was great.keep it up.send more
that was sick
Wooooooooooooooooooooowwww.
That girl needs a brain check. A serious brain check.
Can’t believe she said that live. I WOULD have crashed my car laughing.
So i jst read this on facebook, I bet she is blonde lol. So did they get the prize?
i dont get it? Up the ass? She mis-heard the question, someone explain to me.
I dont get the joke its a bit clumsy compared to others
hey, did they won? i sure hope they did.
So they did’nt win the trip to Gold Coast?
poor dj…
way tooooooooo long
WAY TO LONG 4 ME!! 😀
i cud’nt stop laughing, its the funniest I have ever read.
Not bad. A little long, but not bad.
lol…
Wow…just wow.
I thing this joke is funny but too……………… leanthy
That was mwaaaa….lykd it
dat sh”t was fu’king funny i cant stop crying
Well she thought of WHERE she had it… Not where they DID it.
But i think KITCHEN SEX is always fun!!
I like d joke, it’s rib cracking
BWAAWAWhahaha that was so funny
ahhhh
haha
That ws the greatest here so far….
I am from Sydney and I remember hearing that live and almost had an accident driving as I was laughing so much. In the USA they would can that long before it went live. ozi ozi ozi
HAHAHAHA!! That is so dangerously funny. Hahahaha. It is even funnier if you heard it live on the radio.
ohh poor DJ