Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.
Puritanism: the haunting fear that someone somewhere may be happy.
Be nice to your kids. They’ll choose your nursing home.
3 kinds of people: those who can count and those who can’t.
Auntie Em, Hate you; Hate Kansas; Taking the dog. –Dorothy.
Lead me not into temptation, I can find it myself.
I am not a bum – My wife works
I am not unemployed I am a consultant
I’m out of bed and dressed, what more do you want?
Don’t Start With Me. You Know How I Get.
A good day is when the shit hits the fan and I have time to duck.
I get enough exercise just pushing my luck!
Jack Kevorkian for White House Physician.
Humpty Dumpty didn’t fall…he was pushed.
Life is a sexually transmitted disease.
funny very funny so do u still like pickles?
STDs are like Pokemon: Gotta catch ’em all!
funny
hilarious!
i like jess hoffman’s saying
Rofl
lol gotta catch em all!!!
y would u want 2 catch std’s dumb asses
a nigga obviously didn’t make #7, because everyone knows that the only thing a black person’s wife works is the street.
OMG da 69er! You are so RUDE!
like omg those jokes wern’t good execpt the pokeymon one my some girl. ahaha i HATED IT!
“If you’re gonna ride my ass atleast pull my hair”
XD
lolz i like hunters “)
kinky.
yo “da 69er”, u r wrong dog, its da brothers who work on da street while da wives take kare of their kidz an work
I’ve seen cars that say “my other ride has tits”
“yo” “Red Riven” thats ssooo typical to say “yo” and da wives work to, to put food on the effin table if you didnt kno that..(but you prolly didnt..justtttt sayen=P) And were you meaning a “dude” or a “guy” or a husband? when you said “brothers”?..just wonderen haha
LAWLZ
kitty your so dumb
kitty……… your a penguin f*cker you know that?