Top Ten Ways To Annoy A Yankee
First of all, as a Southerner, it’s your duty to take your sweet time doing anything, which includes reading this joke (Yankee’s are always in a hurry). Call it a game if you wish, and it’s really fun to play when visiting “up North”. I’ve got family there, so this stuff really hits home.
- Talk real slow, and ask them to speak more slowly so you can understand what they’re saying.
- Pronounce all one-syllable words with two.
- Always order sweet tea and/or grits. When they don’t have it, raise a ruckus.
- Correct their pronunciation of certain words. For example: It’s “Pah-kahn” not “Pee-can”. (Amen)
- Put Tabasco on everything.
- Use the word “reckon” in a sentence as often as you can.
- “Mash” buttons. “Cut” off lights. “Carry” the kids to school.
- Never simply “do” something. Be “fixin to do” something.
- Tell them you don’t have an accent, they do.
- Be sure to include “yes/no ma’am/sir” in all conversations… Offends the heck out of ‘em.
What'd You Think?
(22 votes, average: 3.23 out of 5)
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August 15th, 2007 at 9:32 pm
so funny……lovin’ it ya’all!
August 22nd, 2007 at 5:11 am
That’s stupid… why would that offend a “yankee” all that is is acting like a stereotypical southern redneck.
August 22nd, 2007 at 1:18 pm
I thought it was very funny,but of course i am southern born and southern raised!
August 24th, 2007 at 12:03 am
that was great lol!!!!! loved it , i got family up north too !!! lol .. orginally from up north, way up[ north, lol…now way way down south, lol… sweet tea for life! lol
August 29th, 2007 at 8:59 pm
i’m from the north and i thought it was funny, not annoying
September 12th, 2007 at 4:14 pm
I am for the burgh and that was not annoying at all, infact i think it was funny
September 13th, 2007 at 3:50 pm
just for the record…it’s spelled y’all…not ya’all…
September 23rd, 2007 at 3:00 pm
here’s another, say your going to put things up not away. I had a friend from Boston and got on his nerves when I said that.
September 24th, 2007 at 9:22 am
Yeah i’m a “Yankee” too. I thought they were all quite funny. :]. Seems you need new techniques.
November 1st, 2007 at 9:49 am
Wow….
I’ve been saying “mash that button” and “cut the lights off” since I was 3.
Damn, I’m a hick.
November 1st, 2007 at 4:20 pm
sam your an idiot go kill yourself
GO SOUTH!!!
November 2nd, 2007 at 7:22 pm
im a yankee and these things would annoy the CRAP out of me!!!! exept the thing about coke thts everywhere and wtf thts wat WE do…..??? funny:)
November 11th, 2007 at 8:05 am
Sooooooooooo, racist
November 20th, 2007 at 10:08 pm
those are really stupid…i’m glad i don’t have family from the “south” but i guess being an idiotic redneck you need something to boost your self-esteem.
December 23rd, 2007 at 5:23 pm
Okay first off it says annoy not offend sam….
this was soo funny!
March 4th, 2008 at 11:17 pm
i once mixed tabasco sause with passion fruit and gave it to my couzin, it was hilarious, and yes, this was random
June 3rd, 2008 at 5:31 am
I am from the south and we are damn proud to be “idiotic rednecks”. If you have a problem with reading jokes intended to humor…..then you can get off the site u dumb bi%^*.