Top Michael Jackson Jokes
According to Web Usage Associates (and Public Notary), the following ten Michael Jackson Jokes are the most popular with Americans.
Q: What’s the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
A: One is white, made out of plastic, and dangerous for kids to play with and the other you carry your groceries in.
Q: How can you tell if Michael Jackson has a hot date?
A: There’s a big wheel parked outside his house.
Q: Why does Michael Jackson like twenty eight year olds?
A: Because there are twenty of them.
Q: Who does Michael Jackson consider a Perfect “10″?
A: Two 5 year olds.
Q: How does Michael Jackson pick his nose?
A: From a catalogue.
Q: Why did Michael Jackson place a phone call to Boyz-2-Men??
A: He thought it was a delivery service.
Q: What has 18 balls and 3 pubic hairs?
A: A Michael Jackson slumber party.
Q: Did you know they’re putting out a Michael Jackson stamp?
A: Fans get to vote for the white or black Michael Jackson.
Q: What’s brown and often found in a baby’s diaper?
A: Michael Jackson’s hand.
Prince Michael Jackson, Jr. - you know in a few years they’ll probably change his name to: The Child Formerly Known as Michael Jackson’s Baby.
What'd You Think?
(206 votes, average: 3.27 out of 5)
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August 20th, 2007 at 6:48 pm
that was awsom
September 9th, 2007 at 8:24 pm
[...] child returns a few minutes later and says, “Daddy, is Michael Jackson [...]
September 15th, 2007 at 11:58 pm
OMG those were soo funny. i love michael jackson jokes!
September 16th, 2007 at 10:14 pm
OMG wats wrong wit yuu all?? You are accusing someone of something he has been found not guilty of! You all need to get over yourselves
September 19th, 2007 at 4:44 pm
calm down we all know he did it. besides there jokes nobody cares who u are in a joke its suposed to be mean.
September 20th, 2007 at 3:24 pm
thats so true ( funny as f*ckkk)
October 1st, 2007 at 10:49 am
Hey them jokes are hilarious alright but guys, give Michael a break he’s human just like the rest of us and deserves to be treated with some respect. Bottom line, he’s awsome and his music rocks!!!!!!!!!!!!
October 5th, 2007 at 6:46 am
I wonder how many of you guys who are accusing Michael of molesting kids are parents or have any relation to any one of those kids!!!!!!!! My guess is there’s non!!!!! So maybe next time you might wanna create some joke, do it but about yourselves. Oh I know one, GO TO HELLLLLL!!!! Michael is one of the coolest guys alive, and are you guys blind? His charities are 2nd largest after Oprah’s. And I don’t think they’re charities for dogs or cats. They’re for children so pliz put a sock in it!!!!!!!!!
October 5th, 2007 at 10:01 am
How can he be giving money to charities when he can’t afford to pay his electric bill?
October 8th, 2007 at 6:10 pm
mike jackson sucks balls and everyone knows it
October 10th, 2007 at 5:24 pm
This is sad little kiddys.. Stop writting about me and come join me for some anal sex!!!
:O:O:O
October 18th, 2007 at 6:32 am
i have to admit it is funny and rude at the same time. lol
October 22nd, 2007 at 6:33 pm
YOU GUYS HAVE KNOW IDEA WHAT YOUR TALKING ABOUT, LITTLE KIDS DONT TURN ME ON, THEY JUST MAKE ME FEEL WORTH WHILE
November 12th, 2007 at 1:29 pm
Those jokes are really impressive!!! They are so funny and make me laugh although, I am a big fan of the King of Pop
November 18th, 2007 at 2:18 am
whats tha difference between Michael Jackson and an x-box? nothing! they are both made of plastic and it takes a 14 yr old to turn them on! (and M.J is NOT human hes made of plastic!)
November 21st, 2007 at 12:39 pm
i got one, what dose micheal jackson and an ebox have in commen? little boys play with them:3
November 22nd, 2007 at 2:20 am
Hey, I’m so like against this but i gotta go with the flo!!! I got 1 joke hope you’ll find it hilariuous coz I did. Instead of getting a new nose, Michael would have gotten an Adams apple coz wssp with his voice? did he ever break it???????
November 26th, 2007 at 7:09 am
Just stop messing with my husband. He’s so pure and simple. He did nothing to hurt anyone (including children).Once he said,”Instead of
hurting children,I’ll cut my wrist”. Why can’t people understand him? He’s so beautiful inside and out. Please have some empathy.
“JUST STOP PRESSURING HIM!!”
December 2nd, 2007 at 7:08 am
Q: What did the woman at the beach say to Michael Jackson?
A: Get out of my son
Q: When is it bedtime at the neverland ranch?
A: When the big hand touches the little hand
Q: Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a catholic priest?
A: Nothing
December 15th, 2007 at 9:56 pm
please kiddies ,, i have candy (/ and whoopens\)
who is first
oh sorry no one over 8 years old
except you
:}
:0
December 15th, 2007 at 9:57 pm
love me please
remember i have candy
February 27th, 2008 at 4:33 pm
lol
Q- whats the simularence beteween michael jackson and mc donalds.
A- they both stick there meat between two 10 year old buns
February 28th, 2008 at 10:08 am
Please SEND ME YOUR KIDS.
8=====D~~~~~~~~
March 14th, 2008 at 5:31 pm
This is a frigen amasing site
April 13th, 2008 at 8:36 am
Knock knock
who’s there?
little boy blew
little boy blew who?
MICHAEL JACKSON!
May 2nd, 2008 at 5:24 pm
Did you hear McDonalds is releasing a new burger The Michael Jackson Burger Thats 45 year old meat between 8 year old buns
May 19th, 2008 at 9:59 pm
wow melissa first its a joke and second him doing that and him singing good hav nothing to do with each other and the bigest donation everyh was bill gates he donated 6 billion one time
May 20th, 2008 at 5:00 am
Pplz
If you come on here to diss people about looking at michael jackson jokes then why did u come on here?????
o.O
So b4 u critisize other people for thinking michael jackson is weird then dont search up ‘michael jackson jokes’ or watever u searched up.
May 26th, 2008 at 6:26 pm
U SUCK
June 4th, 2008 at 9:50 am
i hate michael jackson
June 7th, 2008 at 11:49 am
In all these jokes all you could talk about was michael and kids. And he was found to be not guilty and your still talking about him, ya’ll so damn dummmmmmmmmmm!!! But i wouldnt mind some sex right now WINK WINK.
June 16th, 2008 at 7:39 pm
thats wierd
June 28th, 2008 at 3:43 pm
haha lol i tell you a michael jackson joke Q:why didn’t michael jackson know how to play chess? A:because he didn’t know if he was black or white lol jokes
July 7th, 2008 at 6:18 pm
if u dont like us joking mj then stay off this site because u r a dumb a** pu**y that should die by being a** fu***d in the A** by mj and a gang of molesters
July 27th, 2008 at 6:35 pm
hey i like that jokes and everything cause there really funny and my friends think so too and i’m not trying to defend him or anything but i think we should respect him more…….but i still think these jokes are awsom!!!!!!
August 20th, 2008 at 3:01 am
whats the diiference between michael jackson and pimples?
Pimples wait till your at least 14 till they come all over your face.
September 6th, 2008 at 2:07 pm
What do Micheal Jackson and a playstation 2 have in common? They’re both plastic and can be turned on by children ;-0