Top 15 Confucius Sayings

Confucius is wise, in fact we’d be much wiser taking his advice. Below are the top 15 Confucius sayings, otherwise known as his famous analects. While there are literally hundreds or thousands of them, most probably made up – we’ve picked our favorites.

  1. Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.
  2. Baseball is wrong. Man with four balls cannot walk.
  3. War doesn’t determine who is right, only who is left.
  4. Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse.
  5. Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.
  6. Man who run behind car get exhausted.
  7. It take many nails to build crib but one screw to fill it.
  8. Man who fishes in other man’s well often catches crabs.
  9. Man who go to bed with itchy butt wake up with stinky fingers.
  10. Marriage is like game of poker. You start with pair and end with full house.
  11. Man who farts in church sits in his own pew.
  12. He who eats too many prunes, sits on toilet many moons.
  13. Elevator smell different to midget.
  14. Those who quote me are fools.
  15. Confucius say too damn much.

Let’s add some of your favorite Confucius analects in the comments section below. I’ll get you started… “Confucious say…”

What'd You Think?

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (110 votes, average: 3.92 out of 5)
Loading ... Loading ...

77 Comments to “Top 15 Confucius Sayings”

Post a reply to to “Top 15 Confucius Sayings”

NOTE: Inappropriate commments will be removed. Please be courteous to others.

Since spambots sometimes comment on jokes, please follow the instructions and answer in the box below: