Things You’ll Never Catch A Redneck Saying
You won’t ever hear a redneck say things like…
- I’ll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.
- Duct tape won’t fix that.
- Honey, I think we should sell the pickup and buy a family sedan.
- Come to think of it, I’ll have a Heineken.
- We don’t keep firearms in this house.
- Has anybody seen the sideburns trimmer?
- You can’t feed that to the dog.
- I thought Graceland was tacky.
- No kids in the back of the pickup, it’s just not safe.
- Wrestling’s fake.
- Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace?
- We’re vegetarians.
- Do you think my gut is too big?
- I’ll have grapefruit and grapes instead of biscuits and gravy.
- Honey, we don’t need another dog.
- Who gives a crap who won the Civil War?
- Give me the small bag of pork rinds.
- Too many deer heads detract from the decor.
- Spittin’ is such a nasty habit.
- I just couldn’t find a thing at Wal-Mart today.
- Checkmate.
- She’s too young to be wearing a bikini.
- Does the salad bar have bean sprouts?
- Hey, here’s an episode of “Hee Haw” that we haven’t seen.
- I don’t have a favorite college team.
- Be sure to bring my salad dressing on the side.
- You ALL.
- Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Darla.
- Nope, no more for me. I’m drivin’ tonight.
What'd You Think?


(10 votes, average: 3.8 out of 5)
August 13th, 2007 at 10:32 am
well it was some what funny.. I am a redneck form the south and I say some of the stuff..
October 5th, 2007 at 9:38 am
im a redneck from the south and i would never say anything on that list! who drinks Heineken when you can have a good ol bud light?!
October 15th, 2007 at 3:10 pm
haha erica. maybe that’s why the joke is “What you Will NOT hear a redneck say” lol
November 18th, 2007 at 11:14 pm
ha erica are you mental or something U R NOT A REDNECK AND WEHY DO YOU ALWAYS POP UP LIKE THAT LOL
December 17th, 2007 at 11:09 am
ok redneck bulldog 4-ever! You don’t know me so idc wat you think you know! And pop up like wat? Idk wat thge hell ur tlkn about! And no i’m not mental……i suffer from natural blondism!