Swine Flu Jokes

Ok, these are all that great… but it’s been requested (alot). So I figured we’d post what we have. Thanks to all those who submitted these short jokes via email or as submitted drafts. Feel free to rail on them in the comments, or add your own.

H1N1 Virus (Swine Flu) Jokes

Pig Swine Flu

  • Q: Did you hear about the guy who said he would get sick when pigs Fly.
    A: The Swine Flu
  • Q: Did you here about the pig who went on the plane?
    Response you might get: The swine flu (this can be the punch line unless they say it. if so then respond: Are you kidding it can’t get on by itself; it needs a carrier).
  • I had a glass of merlot last night. I woke up this morning with a cough and a sniffle. I think it’s wine flu.
  • Someone once said that when a Black man becomes the president, pigs will fly. Sure enough 100 days later.. “swine flew (flu)”.

This Little Piggy

  • This little piggy went to market.
  • This little piggy stayed at home.
  • This little piggy had roast beef.
  • This little piggy had none.
  • And this little piggy went “cough, sneeze” and the whole world’s media went mad over the imminent destruction of the human race, and every journalist found ut that they didn’t have to do too much work if they just did “Find ‘bird’, replace with ‘swine’” on all their saved articles from a year ago, er, all the way home.

PS – Anyone else awaiting the first Policeman to be diagnosed with Swine Flu?


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