Some Pretty Funny Short Jokes

Some jokes just aren’t long enough to garner their own post, so as we collect ‘em they get wadded up together and regurgitated someplace like… well here. Bada Bing!

Quacking Up
A duck walks into a drugstore and asks for a tube of ChapStick. The cashier says to the duck, “That’ll be $1.49.” The duck replies, “Put it on my bill!”

Blue Collar Comedy
What’s the last thing you usually hear before a redneck dies? “Hey, y’all… Watch this!”

Who’s Counting?
How many Deadheads does it take to change a light bulb? 12,001. That’s one to change it, 2,000 to record the event and take pictures, and 10,000 to follow it around until it burns out.

Dog Gone
Q: Why are dogs such bad dancers?
A: They have two left feet.

What’s wrong with lawyer jokes?
Lawyers don’t think they’re funny, and nobody else seems to think that they’re jokes.

Two cannibals are eating a clown. One cannibal turns to the other and asks, “This taste funny to you?”

That’s A Big Bulb
Q: How many egomaniacs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One. The egomaniac holds the light bulb while the rest of the world revolves around him.

Corny Wedding Joke
Did you hear about the two TV antennas that got married? The wedding terrible but the reception was terrific.

Love That Music
What do you get when you play a country song backward? You get your job back, your house back, your wife back, your truck back…

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