Random Thoughts

Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?

Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?

If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

Do they have reserved parking for non-handicapped people at the Special Olympics?

If you can’t drink and drive, why do you need a driver’s license to buy liquor and why do bars have parking lots?

How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?

Why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?

Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?Why does your nose run and your feet smell?

Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?

Why is there an expiration date on SOUR cream?

Why does one get in trouble for WRECKless driving?

A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

If 75% of all accidents happen within 5 miles of home, why not move 10 miles away?

How can there be self-help “groups”?

Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?

If you throw a cat out a car window does it become kitty litter?

How do they get deer to cross at that yellow road sign?

It was recently discovered that research causes cancer in rats.

Whose cruel idea was it for the word “lisp” to have an “s” in it?

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

Why do we sing “Take me out to the ball game” when we’re already there?

If you’re cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

Why do we go under over-passes and over under-passes?

If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?

I almost had a psychic girlfriend, but she left me before we met.

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?

Why do the signs that say “Slow Children” have a picture of a running child?


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