Peter And The Cross
Jesus Christ is dying on the cross, his disciples are gathered around, crying. Peter looks up and notices that Jesus seems to be calling him, "Peter, come hither!"
Immediately Peter rushes over to the cross, only to be hit severely over the head by the roman guard. He gets on his feet again and wants to return to the other disciples when he hears Jesus calling again, "Peter, come hither!"
So, again Peter tries to climb the cross to get to his lord, when the roman soldier draws his sword and chops Peter's arm off. Peter is getting a little pissed and wants to go back to his buddies, but again Jesus summons. The roman guard can't believe that Peter is trying yet AGAIN to climb to the cross, and chops off another arm. Peter is now covered in blood and demented from the blow to the head and wants to call it a day. Jesus hoarsly croaks, "Peter, please, come to me!"
By now, the roman guard is tired of chopping limbs, so he lets Peter be. The faithful disciple struggles to climb the cross (without arms mind you) and after a long while he finally arrives at his Lord's side. Hurting, suffering, bleeding, Peter looks into his Master's eyes and asks, "yes, my Lord. What is it?" Jesus smiles lovingly and looks off into the distance as a weak smile plays across his face, "Look Peter, I can see your house from here!"
What'd You Think?
(120 votes, average: 3.58 out of 5)
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WEEEEAK!!
good one !!!!!!
lol.. that’s for denying him 3 times. =P
This is a stupid joke from a heathen mind.The elements of possibility and plausibility are what make a joke believable.This is not a joke.Please leave Jesus out of your jokes if you don’t know him-if you are not a true christian with a pure mind in which case pure,good,yet interesting jokes will flow from your mind.Here’s one-:
one apostle to another:why did Jesus ask us to become like children if we want to go to heaven ?
2nd apostle:so that it will not be too burdensome for him to carry us!
stupid joke leave jesus out of this
LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
bukki;
You’ve been squeezing your jesus book so hard that you’ve lost circulation to your brain. your joke is not funny, but i can’t blaim you, you have been brainwashed into a fundementilest mind set. It usualy just annoys me when i see religous people, but when i see people like you, it just makes me sad. You were never able to think for yourself, never had a true life…such a waste.
Oh, and if you expected to click on too relgous joke thinking it would be ‘jokes for the religous’ then i’m sorry too dissapoint. perhaps if you look on google for some black guys getting burnt to death or some homosexual getting stabbed you might find something that tickles your fancy.
funny, ellen, u sound like the fundamentalist. You’re annoyed when u see religious people. That hardly sounds neutral. It means u took it personal with bukki because she’s religious and ur not, and not on the merit of what she said.
If ur saying that only atheists can have a ‘true’ life that is not ‘wasted’, then u should be sad for urself
I am a christian and i think its very funny. Nothing personal, God’s people. We just have to continue praying for them. HA HA
Wow he just posted a joke give the guy a break.
Ellen,
Idk what your deal is, but you seem to know alot, so i have a question for you that i hope you’ll answer….Why do we live? what’s our goal? our purpose?,
Lil Deamer23,
Ill have the pleasure of answering those question for you.
1.) No idea you could commit suicide if you want to… really no one will stop you.
2.)We have no freaking goal – we eat, shit, sleep and work thats our goal.. ahh get over yourselves.
3.) We have no purpose, we are only the fluke of the universe… our being on this planet, this universe is only by chance as the conditions were any different we would not exist.
Why do people think that the universe operates in such a way that the question of “why” and “what” is meaningful? As far as I can tell, it’s not.
yo “beacon”. GO TO CHURCH. you sound like a freaking emo. not that i have anything against therm but dear GOD! maybe if you see it gods way you’ll find some meaning. sheesh.
it was sort of disrespectful as to being with Jesus but it was funny but i thin you could have used a different scene.
9 out of 10!Loved it. aint nothing heathen bout it,that’s why we call them jokes,not to be taken literally,dah!
Why do people take offence when jokes are made about Jesus, but laugh when they themselves make jokes about Islam and Juduism?
Hahaha.
if u dont want to read funny jesus jokes y are u on the religious jocks page.
Shut up, its just a joke not real. If you dont like it dont say anything, and give the real world a break from your whining.
P.S. Lil Dreamer, no one know the answers to those questions. There are a theorys but no positive answer so dont bother asking ok?
not that good theres a vampire bat joke like this
Hey look it’s a black gay wiccan watcha gonna do
How could Jesus do that to his faithful disciple? Very thoughtless.
The only heathenry I see, is the terrible delivery of this joke. I first heard this joke 20+ years ago from an 8 year old with much better delivery. Jesus actually called for Peter as if these could be his last words. You know, the way somebody would speak after being severly beaten, stabbed, and nailed to a cross. And Peter would do anything to see his Lord, he wasn’t considering whether to “call it a day,” even with his amputated arms.
Made me smile but I dont think you should put jokes like this up. Its a significant part in a major religion…and no im not a christian – just saying.
HA HA HA
@ Ellen- What on earth gave you the idea Christians don’t like black people? You said “google some black guys getting burnt to death to have fun”. The only way I think you could ever come to that conclusion was how a lot of “Christians” used to support slavery. However, that idea is blown sky-high, since the first people to oppose slavery were the “fundamentalist” Christians; they were the first to say people of all races are created equal. Seriously, I’m actually curious why you think Christians don’t like black people. Some say it’s because Christianity is a “white people’s religion”, which is so dumb. I mean, it started in the Middle East, and hit places like Ethiopia (read Acts 8:26-40 to see) way before England where any white people were. Yeah, maybe it seems most Christians are white, but of the Christians I know, the huge majority would be asian or african, or something other than white.
Am a Christian too and I dn’t see anything wrong with this joke, Infact if you look at the positive side of it, u realize it teaches us something. That no matter how we are persecuted even for nothing, we must still serve God. Like wot peter did in the joke here. Jesus had a sense of humour too, so pls stop making Him appear so serious like he never laughed in His life on earth. For a man to be loved by kids, u shld knw he had a good sense of humour.