Obama Jokes
Look, I can't resist. We've posted a few Obama Jokes already, in fact I think we've written something about Barack Obama five times in the past month. Between the 2008 US elections and all the national television spots running he's been on TV more than those annoying Subway commercials. Love or hate Barack, our readers love reading jokes [...]
(379 votes, average: 3.33 out of 5)
Loading ...
What'd You Think?
(379 votes, average: 3.33 out of 5) Loading ...
The hypocrisy of all this “go green” environmental crap is that all the fingers are pointed directly at the USA.
What about pointing the finger at China, or Russia with all their mines and massive pollutants filling the air faster then every? Or China’s duck and chicken farms that help cause most the influenza out breaks. Or India with all their up and coming factories that pump out so much toxic crap that the air and even their most sacred river is beyond repair? Not to mention all the other south east asian countries following suit?
Yet unlike the USA who has been incorporating emission laws and standards, all these countries arrogantly look the other way.
How about some of those countries start trying to meet us half way? They don’t even make an effort to meet us one tenth of the way.
As for Mr Al Gore… who is it that got sued about a decade ago for being co-owner of a nuclear waste facility that was pumping out alot of toxins? Ironically, very shortly after “as if a cover up” is when he conveniently started to go “green”. He’s a hypocrite. Yet all the bleeding hearts buy into the hype with out any questions, and if you do question, then they refer to their opponents as Nazi’s or litter bugs or whatever.
listen… it is really a pleasure reading you… i wouldn’t be able to point out all these facts you have better in my language. don’t stop because you are meeting exactly what i always go on preaching. when i said that i don’t believe in politics any more, it is exactly for the reasons you have stated… and it’s not because i gave up.. no way… never will… i’m fed up with everything… with all this apparentle nonsense where behind there are aleays very bloody interests that ruin the world… but tell me… what can we do… we should put up a global reveolution… but this is just an utopia as nobody would dare to loose what he has for the cause… and “they” know this very well… I ask you why are you so “angry” towards everything… I don’t need to know why actually because I’m furious… NEVER GIVE UP!!!
Don’t you guys start blaming India, now. India has done its best to reduce pollution, and its measures are rigorous enough. Always it’s the developing countries that get blamed. We’re trying stuff too, you know, the Indian administration is not just about blatant corruption. All countries are trying to reduce pollution, no one’s just all in for destroying the world. You can’t blame any specific country, the effort needs to be collective.
Heya obamamonkey man!
i came back
cause im a really huge hypocrite…
or maybe cause my email told me that you replied…
and i needed a laugh
The sad fact is that if john McCain takes office he might not last 4 more years. The Sadder fact is if Obama takes office America might not last 4 more years.
To John Funk, it really seems through your actions that you did give up.
As for India, there is a differance between blaming and pointing out the obvious truth, and India has done more with contributing to pollution then most industrial countries. Collective effort is a good start however its hard to be collective in responsibility when no other countries even try, yet just point to the USA saying how its Americas fault.
And as for hmmm, all everyone sees you as is nothing more then a crybaby antagonist with nothing to say. Basically just a child whining about whatever they can. Personally I could care less about your email telling you this, but what I find funny is obviously my comments about the truth bother you so much you keep a sharp eye to come back to a comment board that you feel strongly against just to make your presence known. So yes, this was a good laugh. But a bigger laugh for you “hmmm” is, you refer to me as a “Man” but why is it liberal antagonist always assume and make fools of themselves? I will leave it at that for you though and carry on…
As for McCain not lasting, you got to remember, the USA has had other Presidents that were even older then McCain was during his run for White House, and they lasted, so why wouldn’t McCain who was actually younger then some of the past US Presidents? That age thing was a communist/democrat propaganda story and nothing more.
Thing with obama, he has already bluntly lied to his zombie followers and while he hasn’t even been in office for 2 full months yet hes already begging for re-election. Hows that for a big public stroking?
oh sorry
us crybaby antagonists and our political incorrectness.
geez what was i thinking. Man is only a slang term kinda like hey guy! for just people in general
sorry if youre of the other gender or a mixture and offended
i guess i could be a liberal crybaby antagonist with nothing to say…so why do you keep reading my comments?
Seems your doing alot of thinking and putting words into other peoples mouths “hmmm”
Try sticking with actual issues instead of constant crying, such as the 17.000 “seventeen thousand” more troops obanga just authorized to send to afghanistan which we already knew was alie, but people like you bought hook line and sinker when he said he was bringing them all home?
Or will you rather play more red herring/straw man AD HOC fallacies again because you can’t stick to the issues, making you nothing more then a classic liberal antagonist?
oh, the other question is… being a anti obama comment board, which I am at home on, why do you feel so compelled to keep coming back to read and answer is the real question.
Not like you see me going to pro obama sites with comment boards ranting, but obviously you wish to have free reign that is unquestioned and unconditional; only as long as its in your corner so to speak.
This is what an antagonist cry baby is “hmmm”
In other words, to hot in the kitchen, then stick with your own comment boards that celebrate your plastic messiah called obama
you have all these great points to make
but instead of just making them in a way that would convince others, you instead antagonize everyone
even if all they say is a little neutral comment they are attacked
as liberal, communist, stupid, whiney, complaining, oh idk. you thought of them, i dont really need to list it all again
This is why you come to an anti-obama comment board knowing your views are not cared for, knowing this in advance then wondering why your views are not accepted.
Which is identical to the typical emo kiddie who goes out of their way to dress and act so out of the ordinary for attention, then once they get the attention complain about getting it.
you can list all you wish, but the fact is, police state, spreading the wealth, gun control, all aspects of communism. but leave it to monkey see-monkey do type people so wonder how liberalism is equated to communism.
No different then a pro obama fan constantly coming back to a well known anti obama comment board wondering why they are called an antagonizer.
But leave it to the liberal cry baby as usual to again, play the red herring/straw man fallacy once more.
If you read back, which obviously you failed to do so, you would see many have admired what I have to say, except for the liberal crybabies who come here to do some random name calling and no facts.
So, now this is settled… care to comment on the 17.000 “seventeen thousand” troops your commie god obama just ok’d to send over, the same one who said he would bring the troops back home which all of us rational and logical thinkers against obama knew better?
17,000 troops… stay focused “hmmm” ; now… explain this instead of your typical Naner Naner commentary
It’s always the same commenters, I used to drive a truck and we called them CBrambos. Just goes to prove that we all are not united on one specific issue.
Just saw on TV the land of Democrat corruption, Illinois, where Obama was the ever “present” voting Senator is trying to destroy the Constitutional right to keep and bear arms.
Your typical anti gun Democrat proposed a bill that would require gun owners to have a $1,000,000 liability insurance policy covering any damages resulting from negligent or willful acts involving the use of firearms. THERE IS CURRENTLY NO INSURANCE COMPANY THAT WILL ENDORSE SUCH A POLICY, so this is your typical anti gun Democrat trying to destroy true Americans right to keep and bear arms. Even if such a policy were to be offered by the insurance companies it would be ASTRONOMICAL, OUT OF REACH FOR MOST PEOPLE AND ONLY THE RICH COULD AFFORD GUNS.
No doubt your typical RICH FAT CAT LIMOSINE LIBERAL DEMOCRAT WOULD BE ABLE TO AFFORD IT.
According to the bill, the State Police shall revoke and sieze the owners guns if the owner did not have the insurance policy, so a whole lot of people will have their firearms CONFISCATED BY THE STATE POLICE.
Exactly what the socialist pieces of feces Democrats want.
If this UNCONSTITUTIONAL bill becomes law in the land of Democrat corruption, that is Illinois, look for Obama’s traitorous Democrat thugs to institute this in the rest of the 49 United Socialist States of Amerika.
If it does go into effect, youll hear the libtards say its Bushs fault because all the gangs and druggies have guns and then push for total police state like the soviet union.
i love you obama
You continue to make me laugh
all the things you say.
they are so critical yet you actaully have nothing on me
when did i say i liked obama?
and i wasnt insulting you… i DID say you had good points to make.
as for the seventeen thousand troops, i disagree with what he did. i dont think that this decision he made was right.
there now you know…
i love you to alanda…. anything to do tonight?
Obama tried to walk on water at the Reflecting Pool of the Capital Mall but it kept parting
Obama can hear the sound of one hand clapping
Chuck Norris is all powerful but he has to get Obamas permission
If Obama was the last person on Earth, he’d repopulate it , all by himself.
Here are 101 fun lies about Obama:
http://www.randomobamalie.com
P.S. Hey “obama-is-a-monkey”, this isn’t an anti-obama board, despite your repeatedly calling it so. This is a joke site that you keep posting anti-Obama comments to. That doesn’t make it whatever you claim it to be.
FAIL COULD OF BEEN BETTER
Looks like Obama and his Democrat traitors want illegal Mexicans to benefit from the stimulus plan. That’s right, its projected that 300,000 illegal Mexicans will get high paying construction jobs as a result of the “stimulus” plan. Democrats deleted from the bill, the requirement that those employed to do construction work, don’t have to prove they are legal citizens.
The fact that these illegal Mexicans then SEND THE MONEY HOME TO THEIR FAMILIES IN MEXICO DOES NOTHING TO STIMULATE THE ECONOMY HERE IN THE USA!
Just another example of the lying sacks of socialist excrement Democrats screwing over the American people for their own POLITICAL POWER.
It is obvious, the Democrats are doing this to pander to the Hispanic vote, legal and illegal.
So you unemployed construction workers, take note,
Obama and thugs has forced you to sacrifice for the Democrat Party and Mexico.
Three hundred thousand American construction workers won’t have a job because the illegal Mexicans will get it.
This is the kind of “change” the hypocrite Obama is bringing to this country.
Take heart unemployed people, while you are losing your homes and don’t know where your next mean is coming from, Obama and Democrat vermin gave you “stimulus” job to illegal Mexicans.
How about those tacos, amigo?
D Shill i completely agree with you.
thank you for pointing out that fact
as obvious as it should have been with the page being called “Obama Jokes”
ASS
Love in the White House
Mr. and Mrs. President come home to the White House after a Democratic dinner party and Mr. President is very tense. Mrs. President feels sorry for him and pours him a glass of brandy. She takes him by the hand and leads him to the fireplace where a fire is crackling beautifully. Mrs. President sits in a chair with Mr. President’s brandy without giving it to him as she unclasps her dress exposing her full supple breasts. She puts her finger in the brandy, swirls it around then rubs the brandy on her nipple. Mrs. President begins to moan softly as her nipples become erect. Mr. President likes what he sees and kneels in front of Mrs. President and gently starts to lick the brandy off her nipples. Mrs. President moans louder as she lays her head back in pleasure. Mr. President moves his hand down to the bottom of her dress and lifts it up to surprisingly find Mrs. President wearing no underwear and her well shaven lips are moist from excitement. Mr. President uses his finger to open her luscious flower and plays with her erect hood while still tonguing her nipples. Mrs. President is squirming with desire. No longer can Mr. President contain himself so he takes out his throbbing member and slowly slides it into Mrs. President’s wetness. Mr. President starts to thrust harder and harder watching Mrs. President’s breasts bounce with every force. Mr. President sucks on Mrs. President’s nipples as he pushes himself inside her deeper and deeper causing Mrs. President to intensely climax. Mr. President becomes ultimately excited by his wife’s climatic moans and peaks with her. As they both reach their zenith together, they hold each other closely. Mr. President stayed inside Mrs. President laying his head on her breasts while he softened. They both kissed each other and exchanged I love you. Mrs. President asks, “How do you feel Mr. President sir?” Mr. President replies,” I feel so good I think I may side with the Republicans.”
I would think President Teleprompter’s squawny little biceps would be a turn off. What a lying sack of socialist doo Obama is.
Obama and Democrat comrads knew all about AIG bonuses, even made a loop hole in the spendulous bill so they could keep them.
Then when the citizens of America became outraged, these same conartist Democrats pretended to be outraged for the cameras.
How much more will true Americans take from these traitorous thugs? They are bent on destroying this country for their own power.
I hope true Americans don’t forget when it comes time to vote in 2010. Send a lot of these Democrat parasites packing and leave the phony hopenchange messiah BO all by himself.
im sick of all dis crap bout how people did or didnt vote fo him cuz he is black. im a brother, an i cant stand him, hez a socialist, and i think Joe Johnsons comment is right. obama is tryin to give gov power to control all da people, just like most da “democratic” party (aka da socialist party). america aint gonna stay a free country long with the democrats takin all our rights.
democrats just lazy fools who want gov to do everythin for them, until gov becomes dictatorship like china.
OBAMA IS YO MAMA =)
I am glad to hear there are black people who see Obama for the socialist that he is, as well as the democrat party. The Democrat Party WAS for the common man AT ONE TIME. Now the Democrats have gone so far left wing, that they’ve become socialists and have no respect for our Constitutional rights. They are always pitting one of group or people against another to detract from what the democrats are doing. Obama and his Democrat socialist comrads are going to destroy this country with thier incompetance. Look at what Obama is doing. He is cramming his socialist ideas down our throats under the guise of fixing the economy. He wants to control the banks, tell people how much they can or cannot earn, force us into socialized medicine that 93% of the country doesn’t want, because they know it will result in sub standard health care, rationed health care. Now they are trying to sneak in MANDATORY “VOLUNTEERISM” for high school age. They are trying to shut down free speech as well. Our guns are next. Don’t give that crap about “it will never happen”. It already has. The Dems disarmed people after Hurricane Katrina, the cops split and law abiding citizens were helpless against thugs.
In Washington DC, it had been unlawful to own a handgun. Again making true Americans helpless against criminals. This was NARROWLY overturned by the Supreme court, which is pathetic, because it should have an unanimous in favor of residents right to keep and bear arms. If Obama is able to appoint anti gun vermin like himself to the Supreme Court, then you can count on your rights gone.
The federal government is corrrupt to the Democrat core.
These are the very same people who led to the financial mess we are in, yet the dumbed down and uniformed who always vote Democrat put these thugs in power.
The only thing Obama and his Democrat thugs are interested in, is making more people dependent upon the government and thus voting these parasites in every election. Obama and his comrads are only interested in their party’s power and forcing their socialist agenda down we the people’s throats.
I suggest in 2010, we stick our feet up their parasitic arses and vote who we can out. And then make sure that incompetant socialistic Obama does not get another term.
THAT IS THE ONLY WAY TO SAVE AMERICA FROM CERTAIN DESTRUCTION.
If we do not do that, then we deserve the destruction that is coming. Unfortunately, all the rich fat cat Democrats, including Obama will still be partying and enjoying all the luxuries that most of us never indulge in.
We the people, the true Americans will suffer.
The pompous elitist Democrats will continue living it up and pretending to be for the common man.
Did you hear that the white house is haunted??? It is there is a spook living in it!
wtf there is no jokes in here im in in skool suspension trying to have a little bit of fun but dizz makes feel eveb worse……myspace is better but they block it in skool
I love you Obama !
You’re a great guy, I’ve never really met him. But hey, what the hell can you do ?
(:
Yeh, right Obama is a great guy. He cuts down America when he’s over with his socialist European comrads. Now he wants to get rid of our nukes and leave America completely defenseless.
This lunatic needs to do what he preaches. As long as Obama wants to destroy our defenses, let’s have the Secret Service walk away from protecting this dimwit community organizer and his family. No body guards, no protection at all.
Its a Disney World mentality, now. We’re all dancing through fields of butterflies and all is well. Lay down your weapons and the rest of the world will too.
What a moron.
Obama and Democrat comrads are well on their way to destroying America, much to the delight of Europe.
In honor of the 44th President of the United States, a major Ice Cream company has introduced a new flavor: “Barocky Road”.
Barocky Road is a blend of half vanilla, half chocolate, and surrounded by nuts and flakes.
The vanilla portion of the mix is not openly advertised and usually denied as an ingredient.
The nuts and flakes are all very bitter and hard to swallow.
The cost is $100.00 per scoop.
When purchased it will be presented to you in a large beautiful cone, but then the ice cream is taken away and given to the person in line behind you.
Thus you are left with an empty wallet, no change, holding an empty cone, with no hope of getting any ice cream.
Are you feeling stimulated?
See i find it funny that you mention that democrats are trying to get rid of constitutional rights but what about presidents bush’s patriot act or doesn’t that count. You republicans always find the faults int he democrats but fell to see your own.
The yellow bellied, limp wristed Democrats have been trying to destroy our right to keep and bear arms for decades since Kennedy was assasinated. Comparing their treachery to the Patriot Act is bogus. Tell that line of BS to the people whose guns were taken away after Hurricane Katrina. The cops then fled and left citizens to fend for themselves against looters, thugs and rapists. Your precious Democrat press didn’t report that did they. It only came to light because true Americans in the NRA stood up to the socialist pig Democrats and exposed the treachery. Tell your bogus Patriot Act act to the people of DC who were barred from protecting themselves in the murder capital of the world because power hungery Democrats want to enslave American citizens in dependency upon thier useless butts. The Democrats are not for the working people. They are conning the working people. Democrats are interested in their party above country.
That is why the bogus stimulus bill was nothing more than political payback to their left wing extremist minions. Party and power first. Then their Obama went on his denigrating America tour and BOWED down to his muslim leader. Next he’ll be rolling over, exposing his yellow belly so that the Communist Chinese can pee on him. Obama is no leader, he is a follower and left to his extremist devices, he will destroy America.
i dont like obama hes stupid
hes a dummy head and i dont like him
he is stupider than poopoo
HI!
obama is gay
obama does drugs
nobody liked bush cause he made us go to war and he spent so much money on the war. well obamas stimulus plan is the dumbest idea ever. thanks to him we now have one of the poorest gov in the world. he is paying poor people who are to lazy to get off their @$$ and work for a living. and hes raising taxes. im not saying mccain would do better but obama sure isnt the best thing to ever happen to this country and id take bush over obama any day. but hey look on the bright side if hillary had been elected we would relly be screwed
I saw a report that economists had predicted the economy would show sigsn of improvement in late 2009. This prediction was made BEFORE Obama and his Democrat thugs started wasting trillions of dollars on their bogus stimulus plans.
According to these economists, the economy would have turned around even if Obama and socialist thugs would have done nothing.
So the question remains, WHAT WAS THE POINT OF THROWING TRILLIONS OF DOLLARS AWAY.
The answer is simple. To institutute Obama and Democrat comrads extremist and socialist agenda, more government CONtrol over our lives, more dead beats on the government dole, who in turn always vote Democrat, because they know where their freebies come from.
Trillions of dollars were spent to insure the Democrat Party retains POWER and continues to enslave us for decades to come.
And you thought Bill Clinton was a shrewd conman.
It is no wonder so many think Obama is the anti Christ.
I doubt that he is, but I have no doubt he will spend eternity in hell.
First things first wow.
Ok lets take this step by step first you bring up him bowing to the muslim king. Yes this may look bad but you guys always look for the bad in everything its called having respect for the man so he bows in respect. If he hadnt bowed they would of been like o look obama has no respect for other countries kings.
Now with the government control by taking away guns i may not agree with it but i would rather not have guns then be able to just be arested without knowing why and never getting my fair trial and getting stuck in a prison somewhere i guess some people are to slow to understand that every president always has there own agenda. but yet you guys seem to think that your candaite is so perfect but the democrats are so evil.
Hi my names Jeffy i like apples can i have a hug?
I honestly our country would be better off with no president than Obama
HI! Me nAmed JEFfy I like apPles cAn i haVe a HUg? Obama
i laugh at these jokes every time i read them cause id rather see a ghost run tha white house than you!!! im not racist so dont get me confused!!!! i just hate that you would sign a bill for ABORTION and yet what is your religion again?
you cant call yourself a christian because christians dont believe in abortion!!!! so please fill me in on why you really deserve to be the president!!!
your slogan is ” ITS TIME FOR A CHANGE” well when exactly is that change going to happen!!! you suppost to be the higher person so you need too get the job GOING!!!!! and make the right decision!!!!
im not the type to jump on someones case!!! but instead of getting a puppy for you and your kids you should get the world straight first!!!!
im so sick at what the presidents have done in the past that someone that i thought was you would “CHANGE” the crap that were in now!!!!
So Mr. “OBAMA” please step up and do your job!!!!
~THANKS~
Does obama really do drugs?????
i think he was high the day of his INAGURATION!!!