Obama Jokes
Look, I can’t resist. We’ve posted a few Obama Jokes already, in fact I think we’ve written something about Barack Obama five times in the past month. Between the 2008 US elections and all the national television spots running he’s been on TV more than those annoying Subway commercials. Love or hate Barack, our readers love reading jokes about him.
Obama Jokes We’ve Already Posted
- Barack Obama -vs- An Intelligent Little Girl
- Barack Hussein Obama, Can’t We Joke About Him?
- Plot To Kidnap Obama Exposed!
- Short Q&A Obama Jokes
- Spread The Wealth
Late Night Hosts On Obama Being Elected President
“See, I got to admit, as a comedian, I’m gonna miss President Bush. Because Barack Obama is not easy to do jokes about. He doesn’t give you a lot to go on. See, this is why God gave us Joe Biden.” ~Jay Leno
“Earlier this evening, Barack Obama’s 30-minute infomercial appeared on three of the major networks. … Now, if you didn’t see it, one part was a little odd. At the end, Barack said, ‘If you vote now, we’ll throw in a set of steak knives and a can of Oxiclean.’” ~Jay Leno
“But I thought it was one of those heartwarming infomercials. It had a wonderful ending. In the final scene Barack Obama is adopted by Angelina Jolie.” ~Dave Letterman
“But all this doesn’t matter because Obama keeps pulling away in the polls. Every week, he gets a little more ahead. And with almost all groups. Liberals, of course, always supported him. … And conservatives like the idea of paying a black man to clean up their mess.” ~Bill Maher
Obama Himself Cracking Jokes
“That’s what he talked about yesterday, ‘I want to drill here. I want to drill now.’ I don’t know where he was standing. I think he was in a building somewhere.” ~Obama on John McCain’s energy plan.
“I would have to…investigate more of Bill’s dancing abilities, you know, and some of this other stuff before I accurately judge whether he was in fact a brother.” ~Obama on whether Bill Clinton was our first black president.
“I don’t want to be invited to the family hunting party.” ~Obama responding to revelations that he and Dick Cheney are eighth cousins.
“But I have to say tonight’s venue isn’t really what I’m used to. I was originally told we’d be able to move this outdoors to Yankee Stadium, and can somebody tell me what happened to the Greek columns that I requested?” ~Obama at the Al Smith Dinner.
Obama, McCain and All Hillary Die And Go To Heaven
John McCain, Hillary Clinton, and Barack Obama all die and go to heaven. God looks down from his throne and asks McCain, “Do you think you deserve to be in heaven?”
McCain takes a breath and then replies, “Well, I think so because I was a great leader and tried to follow the words in your great book.” God looks down and then says, “You can sit to my left side.”
So, McCain takes his seat and then God asks the same question to Hillary, “Do you think you deserve to be in heaven?” Hillary thinks for a second and then replies, “I think so because I have been fighting for the rights of so many people for so long.” God again looks down and this time says, “You can sit to my right side.”
Finally God turns to Barack Obama and asks, “Do you think you deserve to be in heaven?”
Obama smiled and replied, “I think you’re in my seat.”
A Closing Note From Jay Leno
“Barack Obama gave a big speech on race, and there was one heckler in the audience, kept screaming crazy stuff the whole time. Turns out it was his pastor.”
What'd You Think?
(240 votes, average: 3.35 out of 5)
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Instead of working to keep America safe from terrorism and instead of working to fix the economy, Obama and Democrat comrads are conducting a witch hunt on the previous administration because they don’t agree with their policies.
So how much will this cowardly witch hunt cost us in terms of MORE dollars wasted on this PARTISAN effort?
It is clear Obama is weak, and the whole world knows it.
Several world leaders have made a fool of Obama, which isn’t hard to do.
What goes around comes around.
When the next terrorist attack ocurrs and everyone knows it will under the yellow bellied and incompetant Obama administration, all of Obama’s Democrat comrads, and Obama himself should be charged with treason.
Once again the Democrats have put their party before their country.
I know politicians waste our money. I say Obama is no better than Bush.
He will just screw things up more, just lie a lil’ different is all.
You are right. Despite all the Obama hype before the election that he was a different kind of politician, his actions show that he is just your typical left wing extremist Democrat playing the same class warfare games the Democrats have played for years.
Obama’s stategy is to blame Bush for everything.
Just yesterday Obama had one of the Air Force One copies along with two military jets flying low over New York for a photo opp.
This terrified New Yorkers, as it looked like another terrorist attack.
What a completely STUPID and ARROGANT thing to do.
The Obama talking heads immediately tried making excuses for the community organizer, that their obama didn’t know.
Just like Obama’s Dept. of Homeland Security, coming out and basically calling anyone who doesn’t agree with the obama’s policies as “potential domestic terrorists”. It was no accident this intolerant left wing extremist propoganda came out a day before the tea parties were to occur. An obvious left wing extremist Democrat attempt to SILENCE people.
If America’s Founding Fathers were alive today, I have no doubt that the corrupt Obama and his Democrat thugs would label them potential domestic terrorists.
Now with the Swine flue out break, Obama was trying to talk up his socialized medicine plan. He, Nancey Pelosi and Harry Reid are going to ram socialized medicine through the back door because they know most Americans don’t want it. Most Americans don’t want the incompetant US government in charge of their health care.
We the people must neuter Obama at the polls in 2010.
We must vote Obama’s Democrat comrads out of office to keep Obama in check.
If we don’t, then we deserve the destruction that the inept obama is going to inflict on this country.
Obama is using the swine flu as an excuse to ram through his socialist health care scheme despite the fact that 90% of Americans don’t want socialized medicine.
Americans don’t want the incompetant Obama Democrat government “workers” CONtrolling their health care.
The obama admin is not closing the Mexican US border to prevent more infected people from spreading the swine flu.
The obama admin also is forbidding the border patrol to wear face masks to avoid being infected.
WHY?
Its all about VOTES, the Hispanic vote.
The Democrats are willing to infect the entire country with swine flu for the Hispanic vote.
They don’t want to offend Hispanics by closing the border or by having the border patrol wear masks.
So when thousands of Americans are inflected with the swine flu and who knows how many will die, remember, they did so because the Democrats thought the Hispanic vote was more important than the safety of the American people
Are you people serious? Get a clue
What you really mean, is worship at the community organizer obama alter.
Just be a good little dumbed down Democrat and take whatever crumbs your Democrat masters throw at you. You don’t even have to think for yourself, they will tell you what you are allowed to think, what you are allowed to say and what you are allowed to do.
It is you who needs to get a clue, zombie.
Did you guys hear about the leaked white house documents this morning???
It was an expense bill….
1 million dollars for watermelons, 2 million for kool-aid packages and apparently they are replacing the west wing with a KFC.
use people are qay . have noe life’s .
like who talks bout a black president races bish .
mha president is blk mha lambo is blue nd ill be qod damned if mha rims aint to said mha money liqht qreen nd mha kordans like qrey . i said its obama forealsz dhey needa put a face on a $5,ooo dollar bill .
Bush > Obama
Bush was a good president under the circumstances. Within a year into office he had the world trade centers getting bombed. Obama, on the other hand, has no experiance and it is hsowing. He is all about now and making changes that will effect the economy now. He doesn’t seem to realized that ten years from now were going to be worse off because of him. It would not surprise me if he is the worse president America has ever seen.
hahahahahah bush!!!!!!!! gud thing hes gone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
hi
i want the massage.
I think both bush and obama are idiots.
Neihter realize how much they screwed not only America up, but individual lives.
Both were all talk.
I will admit that I love obama’s ideas, but he has no intention or means to pull them off.
If he could or would, I would be 110% behind him.
Yes, utopia sounds great, but it cannot be ushered in because man in all his flaws is not capable of solving the world’s ills.
And even if mankind could, or in this case, the community organizer Obama, who promises everything, but has no way to pay for it.
His socialized medicine will just result in health care rationing.
Other countries with socialized health care run to America for their ills, what country will we run to for ours once Obama has destroyed this country?
Yes Obama is a lot of talk, but he is also very dangerous because he is hell bent on inflicting his extremist ideas on the whole country.
That is why we need to vote as many Democrats out of office in 2010, to limit Obama’s power.
Right now there are no checks and balances, not even in the self annointed press, because all they do is fawn all over the Obama.
It was once said that an African-American would become president “when pigs fly.” Well, 100 days into the Obama presidency… Swine Flu!
I cant believe that Obama is trying to ban Aspirin??? When asked why he replied because it is white and it works!
This is a good obama joke. Ok so i showed my friend a picture of lots of bears all sitting around doing nothing. I siad there all democrats just letting everything happen and not doing anything about it. the leader of the group is Bearack Obearma.
Dave Letterman said it was quite entertaining watching Michelle Obama getting knocked up by Barney Frank Democrat. Barney thought Michelle was a man.
Obama is goin to screw up this country and we are all going to have to pay back the money he is spending. You cant spend even more money when you are already in debt (which wasnt bushs fault because the dems have been running congress for the pass 2 years befor obama was elected, and they gave loans that shouldnt have been given.). And Barrack “HUSSIAN” Obama has a very weak foreign policy.
And his health care policy isnt going to work because it has been tried many times in other countries and the outcome has all been the same… it FAILED. And all of his ideas are going to lead us into socialism which has been tried in other countries and has been proven to not work. I mean look at mexico nad france and russia, they are all failing. And if you watch news that isnt liberal you would fid out that most of his plans dont kick in until the 3rd year. and he has lied about half of the stuff that he cmpaigned on because he knows that it wont work.
And could someone please tell me why we cant say anything bad about him without being attacked by the left, but it is ok to lie and bad mouth bush.
Democrats only believe in the right to free speech when that speech agrees with their left wing extremist ideology. THAT is why you are not allowed to criticize them or their phony messiah obama.
They are hypocrites and bigots, despite thier claims to be tolerant and open minded.
The press is corrupt in that they are predominantly liberal left wing extremist Democrats and only ask obama softball questions, fawn all over him. Investigative journalism is dead. Its like its no longer taught in school.
Inflation is coming because of the trillions of dollars obama and his democrat comrads are borrowing and throwing down the drain, trying to cram their socialist crap down out throats. You can expect the price of every thing to go up because of inflation.
Thanks to the democrats, the dollar is worth a lot less.
Every day obama and his demons are devising new taxes on our energy, health care premiums, gasoline, soda, cigarettes. You name it, they’re trying to tax it.
So much for obama’s claim that the middle class taxes won’t be going up. He’s a liar. You may not be paying more in federal tax, but you will on everything else.
The only people who benefit under the obama adminstration are the corrupt democrats and unions.
Democrats and left wings are the same all over the world … like in Italy… the only thing that they are good at is to yell scandal for everything that can hurt them… but never have good proposals for people but only for themselves… hope that they will never be elected again in Italy… at least… good luck USA… you really need it…
Yes, the people in Europe have seen it all before.
They have been down the socialism road and know it doesn’t work.
Socialism doesn’t encourage people to work, it only promotes laziness and dependency upon government, which is what Democrats are all about.
Unfortunately America may well be repeating what happened in Italy. Remember Musilini? He destroyed Italy for his own ambitions. Finally the people had enough and they drug his body through the streets.
The same thing is going to happen in the United States if Obama and his corrupt Democrat vermin are allowed to destroy America.
People are losing their jobs and homes. We see a corrupt American government without any checks and balances. Even the Supreme Court seems to have turned into a bunch of cowards unwilling to defend our Constitutional rights.
The American Presidentcy is starting to resemble a dictatorship.
The Constitution of the United States means nothing to Democrats.
They are only concerned about their own power and control.
When the American people have suffered enough and realize their country has been remade into a facist country, it will be then that their anger will force millions into the streets, just like Italy and they will drag the Democrat thugs through the streets.
I would rather see such traitors removed from office through the polls, but as we have seen, election fraud is very prevelant, especially with the tax payer funded Democrat fraud machine ACORN. Americans realizing they’ve been screwed may well riot in the streets just as the Iranians have.
When True Americans finally stand up for America, America’s Founding Fathers who bled and fought for a free America, will rise from their graves in spirit, bayonets held high yelling “Let Freedom Ring!”
So the constitution means nothing to democrats huh ya i see that because bush’s patriot act didn’t get rid of the freedom of speech. You republicans don’t see your own faults.
Are you willing to murder your fellow American for your obama?
Take a look at what is happening in Iran. THAT is what is going to happen here. When the American people have lost everthing they own because of obama and democrat ilk’s extremist policies.
It is no wonder your obama had such a weak response to the Iranians uprising to election fraud, for he knows he and his democrat ilk are guilty of the same thing.
He knows he is a liar and doesn’t care. All he cares about is inflicting his extremist ideology on America.
Your democrats are trying to shut down free speech by intimidation. They are trying to CONtrol ever facet of our lives.
Your obama is not about freedom but oppression and dependency.
Being a black man, he should know better than trying to ENSLAVE and CONtrol millions of people.
He is corrupt to the core, firing anyone who is a threat.
Just a few days ago, he fired an investigator who found wrong doing in the tax payer funded Americorps.
Turns out one of his corrupt friends was using funds for his own person use. This friend is now a mayor.
The corrupt democrat press is not in the least big interested in this scandal, because they are in the tank for your obama.
Money was stolen from the bond holders in the auto bankruptcy deal to give to the unions.
The corrupt democrat press didn’t care about that either.
The corrupt democrat press is just the propoganda arm of the demoncrat party, willing to spew whatever the left wing extremists want and only throwing their annointed obama messiah softball questions.
Anyone who supports such thuggery and corruption is suspect.
You are either an immoral person yourself or very deluded.
Your obama will ask you to murder your fellow American for his cause. Its coming. He is no different than the Irian dictators.
He is more charming and has a sweet smile, but he will destroy this country with his radical views. His huge ego will not allow his
socialist vision to fail.
Watch, wait and see.
Democrats are evil.
Many are seeing this and fleeing the plantation.
o ya the press total is all for obama thats why during the election almost every news channel called him a terrorist ya sounds like suport to me
Wow, I don’t recall the liberal press calling Obama a terrorist at any time. They have been kissing his ars from the very beginning.
Only Hillary Clinton had the guts to say the truth at the time, that Obama is an empty suit.
Now she’s licking his you know what too.
There are no checks and balances anymore in this country.
You have a left wing extremist House, Senate and President who have no respect for the law and have been running over it with a big fat union bulldozer. Only the unions and those who gave $$$$ to Obama are benefitting from this corruption.
The press is in bed with Obama engaging in perverted acts.
As someone said, Obama and the liberal press need to get a room.
Wanna hear another Obama joke? (Chances are you’ve already read it/ heard of it)
White people thought that when a black man enters the white house, It’ll be when Pigs fly
Obama’s in the white house and now there’s Pigs Flu