Meet Marvin, Men’s Answer To Maxine
Q: How many men does it take to open a beer?
A: None. It should be opened when she brings it.
Q: Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
A: Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
Q: Why do women have smaller feet than men?
A: It's one of those 'evolutionary things' that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
A: When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
Q: How do you fix a woman's watch?
A: You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
Q: If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
A: The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
Q: Why do men die before their wives?
A: They want to.
Q: When will women will be equal to men?
A: When they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
Fact: In the beginning, God created the earth and rested. Then God created Man and rested. Then God created Woman. Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
Fact: I married a Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.
Fact: Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%. It's called a Wedding Cake.
Send this to a few good men who need a laugh and to the select few women who can handle it!


(143 votes, average: 4.30 out of 5)
ummm… aha?
Those were good.
they okay
lol some of those were good……
some were guud buhh theres that sexiest humor you have
TO ME, THEY’RE MORE LIKE A GOOD FOOD FOR THOUGHT. NICE ONE.
how can i love
i could see that.
hahhahahahaqahahahahad…ur sooooooo funny!!!!!!…………….i love you dude
I THINK I FOUND IT!
JUST TYPED IN ‘MEET MARVIN’ AND GOT IT.
DOUBT IF IT WILL BE BETTER THAN “MAXINE”!
lol they are really funny dude
i almost pissed my pants
Here’s the funny thing. ALL TRUE.
Has to be the idea a man came up with. LOL It is the way men think for sure.
I don’t think they’re funny. It shows that some men are lazy and women have to do all the work and yet we barly recieve respect (through out history it has all been the same). It is also true that some women are lazy though. The duties of a man should be as equal as a womens. I know that the divorce rates are becoming higher (some I know just got divorced I barly see the kids anymore, the bipolar mom, who could KILL someone when shes in a bad mood, got the kids… SHE HAS BEEN TO AN INSANE ASYLUM BEFORE!!!) when someone becomes married they agree to HELP each other.
By the way I’m 12
Oh and by the way… WHY THE HELL WOULD I OPEN HIS BEER, HE HAS HANDS AND HE COULD GET HIMSELF!!!!!!!
Madison, they’re jokes. It’s men laughing at how stupid other men can be.
Not all of us think that way.
@ madison – get a life…
you were laughin on maxine werent you?
suck it up now
that was sooo funny lol
im a woman and THATS FUNNY!
To Madison: I’m glad that you have a mature mind despite your age and you can use it! I definitely agree with your statement about the beer can though I will not allow my husband to drink it often. P.S. I’m 14!
BTW I’m not married yet.
I love this Marvin is great!!!
THAT MERVIN–HE FUNNY GUY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WHY AREN’T YOU ON FACEBOOK LIKE MAXINE?
if you don’t get this, you’ve clearly never had a girlfriend longer than a week.
Give us more, my belly is sore from laughing so much and have got tears running down my face. Oh so true
funny but men should become less lazy and um u no, b a man at least thts wht i thk cuz if men r sooo strong then why do they need a woman to open up their beer 4 them??
btw- im 12
@Kat,
I do the house work. And I certainly do a better job than my;
Sister,
Girlfriend,
Probably most of the girl population.
By the way, I’m 14.
And I can cook.
Way better than my mother.
very funny