Chuck Norris Facts
In case you didn’t know much about Chuck Norris, this is (for the most part) all you need to know. Of all the people on this world you could tick off, Mr. Norris shouldn’t be one of ‘em… These are some of the most popular Chuck Norris jokes on the net…
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Chuck Norris doesn’t do push-ups he pushes the earth down.
Chuck Norris doesn’t do push-up’s he pushes the earth down.
If you have five dollors, and Chuck norris has five dollars, he has more money then you
Chuck Norris counted up to infinity. Twice.
Chuck Norris doesn’t hit home runs. . .he makes the pitchers run home crying to their mothers
Youu the saying “killed two birds with one stone” well Chuck Norris will extinct you & two bird species with one Round House Kick.
If Chuck Norris has five dollars and you have twenty dollars, Chuck now has twenty five dollars and ur puppy, he loves puppy’s. Then he eats the puppy!!
Chuck Norris has has a third leg……….it’s on his chin under the beard. You have sick minds you should be R.H.K.
Did you know that Chuck Norris’s tears cure cancer? Too bad he never cries…
The world could end at any time. Chuck Norris just doesn’t feel like doing it right now.
Chuck Norris doesn’t sleep with a gun under his pillow, he sleeps with a pillow under his gun… hahahaha!
Chuck Norris sleeps with the light on, not because he’s afraid of the dark but because the dark is afraid of him
chuck norris shot down a german fighter plane by holding up his finger and saying bang!!!
chuck norris can eat a pie in ten seconds
chuck norris ordered a big mac at burger king and got one!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
chuck norris is so awesome that he has his own pokemon card!!!
chuck norris does not get wet the water gets chuck norris!
the giraffe was invented when chuck norris uppercuted a horse
Jesus Can Walk On Water, But Chuck Norris Can Swim On Land
I hate America
Santa Claus actually gives everyone a present. Chuck Norris just pounds some of them into coal. Click on my name to go to my website’s Chuck Norris sections with 300+ Chuck Norris facts!!!
Chuck Norris can climb an electric fence safely
Chuck Norris doesn’t need a ladder, he just walks up the wall
Chuck Norris doent mow the lawn, he dares it to grow.
What came first? The chicken, or the egg?
Chuck Norris.
chuck norris can drown a fish
chuck norris doesnt know about this website or he would delete the internet
Chuck Norris is Too Kool To Kalypso!
(YouTube search)
the last time Chuck Norris breathed was ten years ago.d spot – sahara desert!
Chuck Norris doesn’t upchuck, he chucks up!
“Let there be light!” said God, “Say Please” said Chuck Norris
God once gave Chuck a power to fly, but Chuck traded it with a destructive roundhouse kick. Now Chuck is God.
When do these jokes start getting funny?
Just about now.
Chuck Norris doesn’t get sick, the disease can feel his anger and runs away
CHUCK NORRIS…..’nuff said
The only reason Chuck Norris and the Master Cheif could never fight is because…Chuck Norris IS the Master Cheif
When Chuck norris plays darts, he doesnt throw darts at the dartboard, he throws dartboards at the darts…
It takes two to Tango, but Chuck Norris Tangos alone… Right after roundhouse kicking his partner to space…
Chuck Norris doesnt look under his bed for the Boogey man, the Boogey man looks under his bed for chuck Norris…
Chuck Norris can speak Brail…
The titanic didnt hit an icberg, It hit Chuck Norris when he swam past….
Chuck Norris can play tennis..full court, by himself!
Chuck Norris wrestles as a one man tag team
the nuclear missle and atom bomb are code names for chuck norris
How many chuks could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris?…….. All of it.
chuck norris can make a parapalegic run for his life
Chuck Norris can do a wheely on a unicycle
chuck norris once quoted in his auto biography that steven segal and jean claude van damne are little pussies who probably 69 each other
Chuck Norris doesnt look under his bed for the boogeyman, the boogey man looks under his bed for chuck norris.
Chuck Norris doesnt wear a condom, cuz he doesnt need protection from anything.
Chuck norris can slam a revolving door.
chuck norris died 10 years ago death is just to scared to tell him
jesus walks on water chuck norris walks on jesus