We post all the funny news stories we find right here. Probably not as much as we should, cause there’s load of stupid people making headlines every day.
Mellissa Williamson, a resident of Roanoke Virginia, has had enough. Seems the sound of jackhammers from road construction is driving her crazy - in fact it’s so bad she worries about the effects the noise may have on her unborn baby. Nevermind the cigarette in her hand. Oops.
And these people are proof. Competition has been tough, seems folks are getting stupider by the year. So much for Darwin’s theory, they’re still breeding. Pretty sure these were snagged from the Darwin Awards, but I’m not positive. Funny nonetheless.
Alright I admit, we’re getting a little ahead of ourselves here but what the heck. I took a ride on a time machine the other day and snagged a newspaper from the local vending machine (actually my future self did as I didn’t have an ID chip implanted yet). Here’s the scoop on what’s going down at a later date…
At the Hartsfield-Jackson Atlanta International Airport, an individual later discovered to be a public school teacher was arrested by the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) while attempting to board a flight.
Investigators at a major research institution have discovered the heaviest element known to science. This startling new discovery has been tentatively named Administratium (Ad). This new element has no protons or electrons, thus having an atomic number of 0. It does, however, have 1 neutron, 125 assistant neutrons, 75 vice neutrons, and 111 assistant vice neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.
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