Whole Truth
“You seem to be in some distress,” said the kindly judge to the witness. “Is anything the matter?”
Lawyer Jokes - Page 5
Lawyers are always doing sneaky, slimey, should be illegal things yet they call it the law. So we make fun of them, the dumb laws they make and abate. Enjoy our collection of funny lawyer jokes, but whatever you do don’t show them to an attorney (we don’t want to be sued)!
What Tracks?
Two lawyers were out hunting when they came upon a couple of tracks. After close examination, the first lawyer declared them to be deer tracks. The second lawyer disagreed, insisting they must be elk tracks.
What am I?
A snake and a rabbit were racing along a pair of intersecting forest pathways one day, when they collided at the intersection. They immediately began to argue with one another as to who was at fault for the mishap.
Trip to Mars
NASA was interviewing professionals to be sent to Mars. Only one could go and couldn’t return to Earth.
To the Grave
As Mr. Smith was on his death bed, he attempted to formulate a plan that would allow him to take at least some of his considerable wealth with him. He called for the three men he trusted most–his lawyer, his doctor, and his clergyman. He told them, “I’m going to give you each $30,000 in cash before I die. At my funeral, I want you to place the money in my coffin so that I can try to take it with me.”
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