Female Jokes - Page 9

Between the ages of 18 - 21 a woman is like Africa or Australia. She is half discovered, half wild and naturally beautiful with bushland around the fertile deltas.

Have you ever wondered what Cosmopolitan (the chick magazine) would look like if men wrote the advice columns? Gone would be stuff like "How did you become a better woman" and "Headbands hurt your head because they press against sensitive spots right behind your ears." Instead, it'd look alittle something like this:

Dear Wife,
During the past year I have tried to make love to you 365 times. I have succeeded 36 times, which is an average of once every ten days. The following is a list of why I did not succeed more often:

So I'm driving home driving home from dinner last night with my wife, it's like 16 degrees out. Cold as hell. Icicles on your balls kind of cold. So anyways we're going around a slow corner and she (my wife) spots a baby skunk lying on the side of the road. Being the animal lover she is, I get yelled at to pull over and help the little guy.

A recent news story detailed a medical implant which offers women the chance to experience orgasms with the press of a button. Tiny electrodes are implanted into the spine and a small signal generator in the skin under the buttocks. The patient then controls the sensation with a handheld remote.