About The Michael Jackson Jokes
We're getting absolutely hammered with MJ related searches, which isn't all bad - but some of the comments are. In just the past few days we've had over 2,000 comments posted to the Top Michael Jackson Jokes page. Unfortunately, more than 500 of those had to be removed for being really, really vulgar. We're all about letting you [...]
(134 votes, average: 3.54 out of 5)
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About The Michael Jackson Jokes
What'd You Think?
(134 votes, average: 3.54 out of 5) Loading ...
How do we know Michael Jackson is really dead?
Several children have fingered him.
Kohl’s is having a sale to generate money to help cover the expense of the Michael Jackson funeral, boys underpants are half off.
NOTE: Inappropriate commments will be removed. Please be courteous to others…<— wtf does this meean ?? you mock michael jackson ! and say inapropriate thingss about him ! theese jokes ar dry ! you arent being couteous ! to him ! or anything !
Michael Jackson didn’t die of a heart attack. He died of food poisoning from eating 12 year old nuts.
i think he should have died in jail.. little boys and the world is so sad he sied
omg people he is in the best place now he will never harm another kid again he is in HELL
OMG!!! People Michael Jackson is like the best person that ever lived and he did not go to hell because he did nothing wrong so quit trash talking him.
LET THE POOR MAN REST IN PEACE AS IF HIS LIFE WASNT BAD ENOUGH QUIT SCREWIN WITH HIS AFTER LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!
I gotta tell ya, these jokes are really funny. I am REALLY upset about his death to the extreme that I have done nothing but sit on my computer, read magazines, DVR record ANY AND ALL coverage in reference to him. I honestly thought in the past that he was a child molester until all of this time that I have spent learning about him. For some odd reason, his death really disturbed me, as if he were a relative. Spending all of the time that I have, I no longer feel the same as I did before. This poor guy is just a lost soul. Think about it……..he was a famous recluse by the age of 9!!! How sad is that??? Nobody can understand, including you and I, what that is like. To never go to the store, the movies, an amusement park or anything in the general public at all……wow, what a life huh??? But, I view all of these jokes, whether appropriate or not, funny at the least. Sometimes you just have to smile instead of cry………………….
Michael had so much plastic in his body they decided to melt him into a sliding board so little boys could continue to go down on him.
How can anyone despose of MJ’s body?
Cremating him will result in toxic fumes and if he’s burried, he’ll still be around in 700 years!
Caviar was served at Michael Jacksons funeral because it comes on little white crackers
uugh…i gotta say it…i hate the person of this site…one would think that after he died ppl will have some type of moral respect for the guy whether u liked him or not….what if ur grandmother died and th world started making jokes about her right afta?…u noe damn welll it hurtz to noe ppl r being cruel like dat…i swear….ppl of this world are extreme hypacrits and it disgusts me when ppl r brain washed and CONVINCED michael molested those children…first of all…idk where ppl are gettin off the fact he supposedly molested more then just two kids…second off…u noe those two kids were LYING because the first one he “raped” ctold the TRUTH afew weeks ago…and guess wat! his father TOLD him to lie so the family wont end up in poverty….smfh…..this world is a sad place…and michael wanted to help u poor misgiuded gullabull souls….but u guys would much rather belive a guy with a camera then some michael pleading and begging for ppl tobelieve he wasnt gay, achild molester, or any of those negative things the MEDIA made up……goodness….and mr. NICK WARDD….if u ask me….ifur heart is so cold to say something like THAT?! then please question who is really the one going to hell….all i gotta say is i pray for u..let god have mercy on us….R.I.P Michael Joseph Jackson….i love you with all my being.
First oder of buisiness..Moral respect? For a self admitted immoral person? Furthermore, If my Grandmother was an international superstar child molester, I certainly wouldn’t log onto a site where people are venting about her and attempt to be offended silly.Sorry you’re offended thay we’re convinced he molested more than two kids.I wasn’t aware of the two child limit per customer.C’MON!!Michael hung himself not the media.All the media did was shed light on it thankfully.He admitted to giving minor children wine and called it “JESUS JUICE” before he bedded down with our chilren for the night.What kind of wolf in sheeps clothing?He is no mesiah yet people want to worship someone who was supposed to be a role model for young people,musicians and artists across the globe.Whatever gifts and talents he had didn’t come from him.He just abused them publicly for his own confused drug induced peversions.Period!Thank you for praying for us.While you’re at it , Pray that you don’t look like a pedophile supporter before you meet your maker so you don’t have to be held accountable like Your Michael Joseph Jackson is right now and forever.So have some Jesus Juice take some kids to bed with you and beat it.
What do mj and baby formula have in common?
They both come in little white cans
i am 12 years old and i say:
don’t delete this, or mark it as innapropriate, because this means a lot to me.
im 12 years old and i must say(even though everyone else out there has already said it)I AM MICHAEL JOSEPH JACKSON’S BIGGEST FAN!
now, if you don’t like reading a lot of text, then stop reading now, but at least read a part of it so i know you care.
he was and still is the most loved entertainer on the planet, but, i see him as more than that!tell me, if he became a small star that no one knew, would we still love him as much? him just being a little townie with small dreams, and not a
good-looking(i must say he is sexy & HOT!) brilliant , in the spotlight star? i would, as he is a very good role model and his songs(that he wrote himself) told us all about the real him, the loving, innocent, sweet (and hot)man inside that troubled superstar.
i don’t care how many…nose jobs he had..whether he bleached his skin or not..whether he had a cleft on his chin………NO…i don’t care about that! he was still the same man inside there.He needed love…
He wanted to give love..
they would’nt let him share love…
they took away all he had… except his family & his fans, oh his fans are what kept him going, but slowly, the more rumours that went on international television, the more turned against him, throwing back his love like a silver bullet, which hit him in the heart and…killed him!!!
it was’nt the heavy dose of morphine..or whatever it was, no, that was’nt it.
the loyalty, trust and LOVE of his fans was thrust back upon him all at once, he could’nt escape the net, it smothered, strangled and choked him until every last millimetre of breath disappeared from his lungs, which were refilled will all this love he gave to our world, and…killed Him,…no..wait…not kill Him…MURDER HIM!
WAS ALL HIS WORK FOR NOTHING?
HAVE WE STOPPED OUR WARS?RACISM?DISCRIMINATION?
I SAY….JUSTICE!
HIS WORK WILL NOT GO TO WASTE!
I SHALL FOLLOW IN HIS FOOTSTEPS!
I AM A VERY GOOD SINGER (even if i do say so myself) AND I WILL VERY GLAD TO ENTER A TALENT SHOW AND WIN FOR HIM, MAKE MY OWN RECORDS, WRITE MY OWN SONGS AND DEDICATE IT TO HIM!!!
Considering my past on stage(stage fright) i will be terrified, but the love he has given me and the courage he has shown me will drive me on!
my school friends asked why the other day why i had tape round my fingers, some strands of hair out of my ponytail and why i was so pale, scrawny and why i had written MJ 4EVA! on my left hand
so i said, “iam now fasting, and am a vegetarian, i am following in mr jacksons footsteps to show how much he meant to me,if i cry, i am mourning over Him. if you have any rude or discusting comments to make, make them away from ME, otherwise you Will find yourself in Casualty tomorrow in a full body cast.”
i would quite gladly commit suicide right now if i had a chance to bring Him back alive!but alas, i know that is not possible, even though i believe in magic, no spell could bring him back. Tarot tells me he will dance with the angels and continue to sing in that heavenly voice.
as i bring this to a close, i have one more thing to say……
MICHAEL JOSEPH JACKSON SHALL, PAST, PRESNT AND FUTURE, CONTINUE TO BE THE KING OF POP NOW, AND FOREVERMORE!
I HOPE ONE DAY TO JOIN YOU, UP THERE, IN THE CLOUDS, AND HOPE THAT WHEN I DO, YOU SHALL CROWN ME THE QUEEN(or princess, whichever suits you)OF POP.
Now, those of you who were kind enough to read ALL of this, i truly thank you, and though you’ll be winging about square, aching eyes and moaning about me blabbing on, i just want you to know this hurts me more than it hurts you.
Now, i really have to stop writing this, as my arm is aching, my fingers are numb, my knee is on fire, im supposed to be asleep & my tears are going to make the lappy’s electrics go faulty!
iknow what you’re thinking…HIP,HIP,HURRAY!
that is it isn’t it?
oh well,i’ll be back to write more later.
Goodnight, King Of Pop…my sweet sexy hunky baby!
oh.. umm…well…
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX :$
RESPECT THE DEAD! :’(
For those that are offended.
what did you expect??
it says Micheal Jackson Jokes not Micheal Jackson tributes
BTW Micheal Jackson was dead long time ago. Micheal was reserected into a white woman called Michelle
I can’t believe how many morons actually support a pedophile. MJ pleaded out in trial! Paid them to keep their mouths shut. An innocent man would never plead or pay off his accusers. An innocent man would go down fighting.
in response to andrea h
AMEN! x100000000000000
i think its kinda ignorant of them to make jokes of micheal jackson cause jus cause he made a few mistakes in his life dont make any reason for anyone to make jokes of him!!
everyone make mistakes and i think i am speaking for the whole world!!when i say this and over all micheal jackson did hurt a lot of inisent people,and he did do alot of drugs and stuff but he is human jus like anyone else and him having to leave and loose to children that i kno he loved very much is just rude everyone had there own opion and this is my opion and my statement thank-youagin and we will miss micheal jackson very much!!
But it also was a Godsend because now “his children” will not have to go through the abuse he handed out to all the other children, IF he hadn’t already abused his own that is.
Hooked on phics did nt work for brebre
for everyone except brebre That is
Hooked on phonics did not work for brebre
micheal jackson deserves to burn in hell for molesting those kids.
well i hope he’s in heaven
if hes in hell, he will melt !!
haha! <3
MJ died because his heart couldn’t beat-it,beat-it,beat-it anymore.
I personally do think he had child related issues,and now he is paying for them.Probably not up in heaven either.
did you hear that mcdonalds is commin out with a new meal
its called the mcjackson
10 year old meat between 30 year old buns
lololololol
All you negative talkers, you were just jealous of MJ. He was never a child molester. That was a dummy that needed money like yourself. God is the only one that judge mj your comments, opinions, don’t even matter. Shut up who cares how you all feels. You don’t know god obviously, but guess what you may as well be a child molester or whatever you want to call because you will suffer worse than MJ because of you mouth and the stupid stuff that’s coming out of it just shut up.
The latest book out on Michael (Michael Jackson Unmasked) says the kid from the 1993 case told the police Michael was circumcised. Michael’s medical records show that he WASN’T circumcised. Some pretty basic info that his accuser couldn’t get right if Michael really did all the things he was accused of. Michael was acquitted of all charges in the 2005 case. So where the hell do you fools get off calling him a child molester? Michael did more to help children than any of you losers could do in 50 lifetimes.
So all you Jackson lovers, BE honest would you of left your kids with him for a week at the neverland ranch, cmon be honest ? ask yourself why.
Remember the “living with michael jackson” documentry, he told many many lies in that, never had plastic surgery, his postmortem said 13 cases of surgery were found. The children who are clearly white, he said that he had a relationship with the mother, then later said that he had never met the mothers of his kids, now people are coming forward claiming to be the fathers, more lies. Why did he pay off that family in 1993 ?
the man was talented,but was a case and should of been kept away from children
think guys
yo um jasmine large…uhhh whats so sexy about not having a nose
( see coments above) i do agree though, i am also young, 10, that mj WAS FRWAKIN AWSOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thats right FREAKIN AWSOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so thats all im gonna say about that.
( FREAKIN AWSOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
THRILLER, THILLER-ER!!!!!
REST IN PEACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!( OR PIECES CAUSE HE PROBABLY BROKE WHEN HE FELL CAUSE HE’S MADE OF GLASS LOL)
PS I HAVE TOTAL RESPECT FOR MJ………………EXCEPT WHEN IT COMES TO HIS JOKES
MICHAEL JOSEPH JACKSON
1958-2009
PSS I THINK ITS ‘58
What was Farrah Fawcett’s last wish? For all the children to be safe!
Michael Jackson never touched any kid inappropriately. sheesh
don’t believe everything you read.
i grew up with him.
almost funny jokes, but you’d really hurt his feelings.
well i may only be 14 but i did know a lot of mj and i can tell u he did a lot for kids and everything and i really strongly disagree with negative comments sure he had face lifts and plastic surgery but all of his sisters and brothers did too and if u knew that his father was abusive and called him ugly and big nose then u would understand why he did the things he did to his face and about his skin color he had a skin diesiese called vitigilo but i personally think mj was sexy as hell but he never did anything bad to kids he gave millions of dollars to children charities and the only thing that was wrong with mj was that he had a skrewed up childhood and he never got to really do the things everyday children did so he took advangtage of that when he got older. i really care about mj and the jokes truly disgust me. i hurt me to my heart when i learned he had died and sitting reading these jokes i cried. and to any one who wants to be a smart ass and say i shouldnt have read it i just want to say that i read it just to see how cruel people would be even after he had died. and when the makers of this website see this and say its just buisness or wat ever then thats u. mj was a good guy…if he ever saw this u would really hurt his feellings. have a heart people..i cant reveal my identity or if 14 is my real age but i can say that michael joseph jackson was like a role model to me almost like family kinda like my uncle….and prince michael jackson I prince michael jackson II aka blanket and Paris michael katherine jackson were the most precious kids ever…mj would never to anything to hurt a child maccaullay culkin even testefied and sayed mj never touched him. what do u think neverand was all about u people hear one thing and belive it….but its all peaches and creem because one day you all will get your my mj doesnt deserve this.. someone will belive me and if you have anything personally to say to me my email address is hotgumchewer557@hotmail.com i am a michael jackson expert and i can tell u anything you want to know about him or if you have anything to say…
and this oh for pete sakes dude i would really like to speak with you…u sound interesting
I find it amazing so that so many ,apparently, sane humans gave MJ a moments thought. As a role model he was apalling to youngsters, and the media made him and destroyed him, as it will.
He was so full of drugs that you could have probably distilled him into a new strain of cure-all.
How he can have ‘fans’ that worship him is truly bizarre. But his life was like that.
Anyway, good site , laughing makes the world go round. No one should take themselves that seriously as we all vanish off teh planet one day, as will the planet also . Joke. Why is MJ like a Zebra? A. It doesn’t know whether to tick the black or white box on the census form.
hotgumchewer – your email address is just ripe for jokes too
LOL. Oman, these are awesome. xD
Dude, some of these are amazing.
Also,
Come on, guys.
It’s a joke site, not a site to honour him.
You people who have all this love for him shouldn’t be on this site to begin with.
Bashing the people who are making the jokes just fuel them on to make more.
(;
in response to “mjj dream fer a life time”
1. why punctuate after “older?” I mean that sentence was going so well….keep it going.
2. any assumptions you make about mj’s personal life are just that, assumptions. you don’t know him just like we don’t know him.
3. so culkin says he didn’t touch him? so what? does that mean he never touched anybody?
4. “i can’t reveal my identity or if 14 is my real age.” so………you’re telling us you’re not really 14? if you’re gonna lie about your age, say you’re 40, being 14 doesn’t give you any clout.
5. whether his kids are good people has absolutely nothing to do with this. although i imagine we’ll discover at least one of those kids isn’t even his in the next few months.
6. “sure he had facelifts and plastic surgery but his brothers and sisters did too.” what exactly is the point you are trying to make here?
7. “but i personally think mj was sexy as hell.” UM……wow.
8. “but it’s all peaches and cream.” this doesn’t sound like an expression a 14 year old would know or use.
so, basically…i think you’re an idiot.
leave mj alone he is already dead what more can u even do just leave him alone already cause if u r dead u woulded like it if we made fun of u right leave him alone he never even touched kidz treat him like he is inasint not a criminal dumb faces for get the mj haters and umm michael jackson is hot i love him i wish he was still alive so LEAVE HIM ALONE ALREADY OR ELSE GOD WILL PUNISH U AINT LIEING SO HA HA HA MJ HATERS
These jokes are really harsh if you guys think MJ molested kids then yur idiots he was and is the most loving celebrity in the whole WORLD. talking about someone badly after they’ve died is really shallow. see you think it funny to make fun of someone thats dead but its not. has anyone talked about farrah fawcett, anna nicole smith, bea arthur,billy mays,steve mcnair ANY OF THOSE PEOPLE!! I guess you think its okay to talk about him in that way just cuz he was ACCUSED of child molestation. JUST CUZ his skin color and nose changed. If those rumors about his father abusing are true then most of you mean people have no idea where he wuz coming from. he had NO CHILDHOOD AT ALL! think about stuff like this seriously guys just think…
They say celebrities die in threes. Leave it to Billy Mays to throw his in for free.
happy now, i love mj?
Like said earlier, Michael Jackson pleaded out in trial! An innocent man would never plead or pay off his accusers. An innocent man would go down fighting. You guys act as if Michael was a victim but he was the one who created his own monster. He killed himself!!!! Great job Michael, you did the right thing!!!
THIS WEBSITE IS A PEICE OF **** HOW DARE YOU MAKE FUN OF MICHAEL, HE IS THE GREATEST PERSON EVER TO LIVE ON EARTH! AND IF U CANT FACE THAT THEN SCREW ALL OF YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
All you haters need to stop hating. Ya haters whose cracking jokes are jealous cause ya don’t have the talent, creativity, compassion, & love & care like M.J did.
Love you Michael Jackson. xoxox 4ever
Ya HATERS talk about M.J so much with ya lame a** jokes. Ya must LOVE him. Some you men up here cracking jokes probably in LOVE with Michael Jackson (Intimacy & fantasties). The Men up here wish they could’ve been the LOVE of M.J’s life.
ok first of all in repy to mjmjmj i just gotta say that you dont know me so i dont suggest you go out and talk to me that way and by the way im not 14 im 22 and i was actually met jackson personaly many times and the kids that accused him i met them too once or twice ofcousre mac is a lot older than me but between me mac and apple head (aka what we use to call michael) we had some good times. the reason i wrote that comment the way i did was to not give my identity away or let anyone know that i personally knew michael. all i was saying was stuff that i actually knew about michael and was trying to make clear to these people sure the joke may be a little funny i mean everyone was born with a sense of humor but those jokes were horrible and and cruel and trust me michael wouldnt have liked it very much
in reply to 007jean yes if i ever had kids i would have left them with him for a weekend at never land and they would have loved i sure did neverland was an amazingly magical place if you had ever had the experience of going and meeting michael you would have though so too i was like 3 when i first went at that sleep over i dont believe he ever touched anyone becase at the sleep overs i went to with liz my moms little sister was there and she was in the pepsi generation commercial so she was one of the older kids and she can tell you even though shes like 30 something know that those parties were awesome
in reply to I LOVE MJ and Jasmine Large those are really great comments some one agrees with me you are trully caring people
THANKS FOR LISTENING
Q. mommy is god a man or a woman
A. why he’s both man and woman
Q. mommy is god gay or strait
A. why he’s bot gay and strait
Q. mommy is god white or black
A. why he’s both white and black
Q. mommy is god michael jackson
MJJ dream fer alife time… you can honestly say that you were a part of neverland…come on i don’t believe it!!! I have been a MJ fan for over 40 years now and I also know alot about the man and what he was deep down. He was tormented by his father for one, had no childhood, and was callled BIG NOSE by that lovely father of his while growing up. So why do we suppose he didn’t like what he saw when he looked in the mirror. I only hope that what you say is not BS, I’m not calling you a liar ok, but sometimes we can get carried away with the moment. I was a part of MJ’s fan club when I was a child and would run around my neighborhood singing MJ songs, ABC, I want you back, I’ll be there and I loved the movie “BEN” which he sang. He will forever live in my memory as one of the most legendary pop stars. I trully do miss him and am very saddened each day that goes by.