Gas prices seem to have been skyrocketing in recent years. I remember when gas was $0.70 a gallon (and I’m not that old), now it costs $80 to fill up an SUV. Here’s a few gas related one liners to bust off next time you’re complaining about it at the pump…
I bought a new Lincoln Aviator but had to return it to the dealer the next day because I couldn’t get the dang radio to work. The salesman explained that the radio was voice activated, I just didn’t know how to work it. He offered to show me how.
Art Fart
It’s such a beauty you want to immortalize it on canvas.
Arrogant Fart
When you think your farts don’t stink.
Finally, after all these years of trying yo-yo diets… phentermine, hoodia, cialis (no wait that’s for erectile dysfunction)… finally some diet tips that actually work. Enjoy feeling better about yourself.
Little Johnny’s teacher got up in front of the class and announced they were going to play a guessing game! The teacher said, “I have something behind my back. It’s red in color and round. It’s soft, but it’s hard.”