A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband, “Please be gentle, I’m still a virgin.”
“What?” said the puzzled groom. “How can that be if you’ve been married ten times?”
Well…
“Husband #1 was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to be.
Husband #2 was in software services: he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he’d look into it and get back to me.
Husband #3 was from field services: he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn’t get the system up.
Husband #4 was in telemarketing: even though he knew he had the order, he didn’t know when he would be able to deliver.
Husband #5 was an engineer: he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.
Husband #6 was from finance and administration: he thought he knew how, but he wasn’t sure whether it was his job or not.
Husband #7 was in marketing: although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.
Husband #8 was a psychologist: all he ever did was talk about it.
Husband #9 was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it.
Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was… God! I miss him! But now that I’ve married you, I’m really excited!”
“Good,” said the new husband, “But… why?”
“You’re a lawyer. This time I know I’m gonna get screwed!”
What'd You Think?
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11th Time Is The Charm was written by F&J Staff on Saturday, October 13th, 2007 at 7:06 am. It was filed under Dirty Jokes, Jokes, Lawyer Jokes.
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(68 votes, average: 4.01 out of 5)
October 13th, 2007 at 3:58 pm
Haha.. smart.
October 15th, 2007 at 9:45 am
ha ha ha…boring
October 15th, 2007 at 11:08 am
it took too much to build up to the funny part. sry. not amused.
October 15th, 2007 at 5:18 pm
haha funny but it took too long to get to the funny part. Funny comment though.
October 15th, 2007 at 10:57 pm
I love lawyer jokes so that was funny
October 16th, 2007 at 11:52 am
Haw haw!!!
October 16th, 2007 at 5:15 pm
YEA IT WAS TOO LONG, SO LONG THAT I SKIPPED THE WHOLE JOKE JUST TO GET TO THE LAST PART AND WHEN I READ IT I WAS NOT LAUGHING. SORRY IT WAS NOT FUNNY AT ALL BUT KEEP UP THE WORK
October 17th, 2007 at 1:31 am
this was the worse joke eva
October 17th, 2007 at 9:21 am
nice one
October 17th, 2007 at 10:22 am
this is f@#% up
October 17th, 2007 at 2:27 pm
ha ha ha
October 17th, 2007 at 2:45 pm
It’s a funny joke but like Sally said ..it took too long to build up to the funny part.
The first time I heard this joke…only husband 8,9,10 were used in the joke…alot shorter and still to the point.
So,
A lawyer married a woman who had been divorced 3 times.
On their honeymoon, his wife told him to be gentle with her because it was her first.
‘First time? How? You’ve been married 3 times already.’
With that, she replied: ‘Well, the first one was a psychologist, so all he did was talk about it, the 2nd was a gynecologist, so all he did was look at it, and the 3rd was a stamp collector so all he did was lick it. You’re a lawyer, so now I know I’ll get screwed!’
ha ha…same funny..just shorter.
jokes shouldn’t be long unless really worth the laugh..
otherwise you loose the reader’s interest.
just thought I’d help you out for the next time you wanna tell a joke.
October 24th, 2007 at 5:18 am
too long!!!
October 26th, 2007 at 10:15 pm
seriously WAY too long for a not too funny joke…
November 16th, 2007 at 7:55 am
too long for a joke that stinks like this
January 18th, 2008 at 9:58 pm
lmao !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
February 25th, 2008 at 11:10 pm
I have heard this joke many times . . . Like Steph said it is much better shorter, she heard it with just 8,9,10. I have heard it with 1, 8,9, and 10 . . . as well as just 8,9,and 10. Honestly to sit and read through it all it takes the little chuckle away . . . do I must only offer a 1 vote for this joke.